my 16 year old son went to his school prom last night and came home drunk. Should i punish him?

Answer 1

no, it was his prom i'm sure everyone was drunk-i was going out into town at 15. at least you knew where he was and he came home safe-this is only the start he's going to be getting drunk from now on for many years to come-thats life

i dont know why people are giving thumbs down-do you walk around with rose coloured glasses or what-kids get drunk!! whats punishing him going to do-make him stay out all night and get drunk so he doesnt have to confront you!! isnt better he comes home to you drunk rather than worry where he is-i think yes!!!

Answer 2

Most definately not! Punishment will make him resent you and doesn't bring understanding.

Talk to him, let him know that you are disappointed but don't shout or lay the blame on him. Peer pressure and excitement contributed to that hugely! Take no more than five minutes to explain rationally and reasonably. Then explain to him that he is allowed to drink on special occasions so long as he recognises when he has had enough.

Asking him to cook tea or do the dishes or some other chore for a week or so is not a bad idea though. Don't force an apology out of him, it won't be heartfelt.

If you treat him exactly as you would treat your husband after coming home a little drunk he wil feel as though you recognise him as an adult and is more likely to behave as one. If you try and clamp the behaviour down he will try to rebel just because you told him not too. Letting him know it's ok to drink in moderation from time to time will mean he's less likely to actually drink in the first place as it's less of a rebellious act!

Answer 3

I can only have these explanations for such a question:

1.- It's been a long time since you've been a teenager

2.- You're American.


OK, I agree it's not good to get drunk, especially at such a young age. But I was always a responsible girl, had really good grades, didn't smoke, your know the type. And the first time I got drunk I was 14. It's just the way it goes nowadays. The new generations are starting to drink even younger. OK, I confess I wasn't getting drunk every weekend (although many of my classmates did, private school and everything), but I was starting to experiment things. I'm not saying you should forget it either. I would say speak to him and say you understand he was trying new things and testing his body, but that getting drunk is pathetic and although he may feel more confident, it's a fake and he's making a fool of himself and even damaging his health. But I wouldn't be very serious, because if you get really angry he will keep on drinking but he will make sure you don't realize.

Answer 4

ur kidding right? no you shouldnt punish him its just part of being a kid.
I'm 13 by the way and if your gonna be mad about ur 16 year old then you couldnt survive being a parent at my middleschool just about half the school are always drunk, and high you cant even count how many kids have been sent to juvi and at least 10 girls have goten obartions.
be happy your son got drunk this one time when he was 16.

Answer 5

I don't think you should punish, that might cause him to rebel. Could you have a laugh with him, take the mickey, about it mixed with a im trusting you not to do this again message? my parents were always cool about me trying alcohol and i never went behind their back. If he's going to do it he will and isn't it far better for him to be able to talk to you about it and so that you are there to help if he needs it. What did you do at 16? I not saying don't hit home that it's serious drinking at a young age, just think whats best for your relationship.You know him better than us!

Answer 6

Unless you suspect that he's drinking at other times then I'd say just sit him down and tell him that you're disappointed that he got drunk, and explain the dangers of drinking to him.
Try not to talk down to him though, or it'll encourage him to go out n drink even more! But just alert him to the dangers.
Maybe even work out how much so many cans or bottles are and work out how many weeks of not drinking it'd take him to save up for a new game or computer console, something he enjoys.
I was the same with smoking. I scoffed at everyone who told me about it, but the amount of money I've saved since giving up is like, Woah! How much!?

If this is the only time he's been drunk, then it's probably just because it was his prom and you probably have nothing to worry about. But just try talking to him as an adult.

Answer 7

You should punish him. But don't be to harsh. You can't let him think it is ok, but it was prom and really what did you expect. When i was 16 I got caught drinking, I got grounded for 3 weeks. (Suppose to be a month got off early for good behavior) I was a good kid, honor role, active student in school, all that stuff. It didn't stop me, but i was more careful.

Answer 8

Punishing him isn't going to stop him doing it again. It will only make him more sneaky about it. Take the novelty away, allow him to have a few in front of you with a couple of mates. I did my son is now almost 20 he doesn't drink at all anymore. I knew where he was and how many he was having.

Answer 9

Prom or no prom underage drinking is nothing to mess with. If you don't stop it the first time you can never do it. Talk to him seriously ,be firm and understanding at the same time. I don't propose a harsh treatment but extra chores and\or grounding would not be that bad an idea.

Answer 10

no i don't think you should punish him but make him understand that being drunk isn't as fun as it seems accidents happen very easily when you have ost the capacity of thinking straight...also tell him that he can be the cause of an accident or even worse be to drunk to realize an accident has happened and react in time...tell him this time it was a try out...and that next time he its not gonna be punishment..but he will just not have your trust anymore...and then how can you ever let him go out??? if there is no trust there is nothing...good luck...