It is clear that children need to be supported by BOTH parents, though I'm not quite understanding why fathers get screwed over so bad. How can women get pregnant and then expect the man to pay them child support, spousal maintenance, etc. Don't these women have a financial responsibility as well? I'm especially referring to men who make a significant amount of money. These women are often considered "gold-diggers". This is not the most wonderful label, though it almost seems true. Whatever happened to each parent paying half of everything for the child? Especially when a marriage only lasted for a few years.
2007-07-04 16:41:58 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
To expand more......So the ex wife makes $75,000 and the ex husband maked $135,000. Why does she need $1,800 a month to care for a toddler? She has a higher education than he does and is doing quite well. When it comes down to it, I don't think it is the money at all. I think it is the angry ex wife who wants revenge on the husband. The ex husband is already paying for whatever the child could possibly need. Hello divorce is divorce. If she was so concerned about that childs life maybe she would've tried a bit harder to make the marriage work!
2007-07-05 07:04:42 · update #1
welcome to the men world of being screwed hard
2007-07-04 16:50:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
Too many women fall for the romanticized version of the fairy tale life, marry and/or get pregnant (and guess what, it didn't happen all on her own...they guy is the one who impregnated) before getting good education to get a decent job, some may never have had a job outside of the home and now have to go to trade school or vocation training, for which some states allow a temporary period where the man has to pay maintenance in addition to child support until she gains the skills to be gainfully employed.
As to child support, most states have a formula and it does go off of what each parent makes; therefore, if the man earns a lot more money than the woman, he has to pay a greater percentage for the child to have the same standard of living that they would have had had the family remained intact.
It sounds like you are girlfriend/fiancee/ or wife #2 of a man that has to shell out money for his children and possibly spousal support/maintenance to a former wife. Get over it or don't stay in/get of of the relationship with the man as there will be no happiness for anyone if you are resentful of his commitments to his first family.
Who knows, you might find yourself in the tail end of this situation someday and be thankful you can put a roof over you and your child(ren)'s head(s).
2007-07-05 07:30:08 · answer #2 · answered by bottleblondemama 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The interesting point of your question is the following:
"Especially when a marriage only lasted for a few years"
are you saying that child support should be based on how long the marriage remains intact? If that were the case, then what is to stop any parent from leaving upon the birth of the child and not being held responsible for supporting such child?
I suggest you compare the cost of raising a child when the child is in residence versus the amount of child support ordered by the court. Then come back when you realize that most child support does not rise to the 1/2 needed to offset the costs.
By the way, I pay $5,000 a month and it is plenty to keep my girls in the lifestyle they would have enjoyed had the marriage continued.
2007-07-05 05:25:54 · answer #3 · answered by hexeliebe 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I understand a father paying for his children's care and need but sometimes it is drastic. Would the mother not have to live in her house, pay for cable, pay her phone bill, car payment, etc if she didn't have the child? No, she'd STILL have to pay these things- so I don't see why they take those costs into account After all, the father has bills to pay too. My uncle pays his ex-girlfriend $1200 per month. I'm sure it doesn't take that much money to clothe and feed a 5 year old little girl.
ETA: And she's on my uncle's medical insurance and he buys her clothes and toys. So those are expenses her mom doesn't have to pay either. My uncle drives a 2000 truck. His ex drives an 07 Jeep Commander.....wonder how she pays for that??
Wildflower- what do you mean "half" of the rent, phone bill, water, etc? You'd still have to pay those things even if you didn't have a child. So your ex should pay 100% of his rent/bills AND 50% of yours?....and you only have to pay 50%? How is that fair? Did you live in a cardboard box before your daughter was born? Would you live in a cardboard box if you didn't have a child right now?
2007-07-04 23:51:55 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Do you have children? As a single mom I can honestly tell you that what I get in child support (significant buy not amazing) barely covers her half of the expenses... I pay $500 in child care per month, $200 in medical insuranceper month, copays for doctors, dentists, etc., her clothes (she outgrows everything about every 4-6 months), her entertainment / toys, then let's get down to gymnastics class, half of the rent, half the electricity/ phone bill/water / etc.. YIKES! But, I'm not complaining, she's my world and I'd take it all on without child support.. but it does help. Usually a man pays 20% for one child and upwards, but can have it lowered if income is low. I guarantee I pay a lot more than 20% of my income for her expenses.
PS TWO people make a child.. either could have used birth control.. if you don't want to pay, you shouldn't play.. or at least make sure to use a condom.
2007-07-04 23:48:56 · answer #5 · answered by Wildflower 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
It may take two to tango to create a child, but the courts have given women the right to choose whether to keep or abort a child. So complaining about all the expenses, and bills is ridiculous. A man doesn't have the right to choose whether or not a child is born, but must be near homeless to support someone else's decision.
2007-07-05 00:07:28 · answer #6 · answered by Sweet 5 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Most of the time the mother takes the children, and that can be tough alone. You need all of the support you need. Whether it be financial or other.
2007-07-04 23:55:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
my marriage lasted 16 MISERABLE years, and when i divorced the STATE gave me the kids, (he had nowhere to live but his parents home), and gave me child support comparing our incomes
i didnt marry him and have three kids to divorce him!
i dont like being heaped in with ALL women...
2007-07-04 23:47:35 · answer #8 · answered by bronzebabekentucky 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Some women do work and pay their part,the ones who don,t we tax payers pay for it.Compliments of D.S.S. and the courts.They do NOT make any of these girls take responsibility in any way.They usually take the woman's side no matter how horrible she is.
2007-07-04 23:47:13 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋