achieving the things i want in life? im 30, have borderline personality disorder, ive suffered pain and trauma half my life. but i have some clear goals i would like to achieve with my life, ive never achieved or fullfilled anything in life including a girlfriend, never worked, never gained any qualifications, never made any friends, and i would like to achieve all these and more, my big ambition is to eventually emigrate from the uk, to somewhere distant, and find a loving girlfriend that looks similar to beth ditto (the rock chick)..but all i here from people all the time that surround me is....
you cant do this.....and...you cant do that....and you ' cant' runaway from things...and you cant this, this this, and that....~well im tired of it! are these people trying to control my life? what i can do? where i can go? what girlfriend i can have?.............thats all i here, cant cant cant and cant...i feel sometimes i could dedicate my energy to battering their skulls in with my fists
2007-07-04 12:32:08 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
can anyone understand my frustration about this? ive missed out so much in life and just want to achieve happiness and fullfillment....i do wanna move far away from britain. but it feels like certain people are controling me
2007-07-04 12:33:36 · update #1
Well, you certainly can't bash in any skulls. That wouldn't solve your problem(s) anyway.
The people that tell you "you can't do this" and "you can't do that...," may be just concerned that your goals are way too unacheivable. I don't believe they tell you this out of hatred or wanting to see you fail.
Just start with very small goals. Only you can complete your goals so don't get so angry with others if you have not finished something. It is not their fault. It IS your responsibility.
Before you move from the U.K., you should make sure you can "make it" on your own where you are.
If you need some help in deciding how to achieve your goals, then seek that help. If your family and friends don't know how to help you, get outside (and/or professional) help. It is a little difficult to answer your question. Perhaps if you got even more specific, more people could understand and help you better.
2007-07-04 12:48:29 · answer #1 · answered by BLM 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I you have certain goals in life it will be necessary to develop a plan to reach those goals. If you believe people are impeding your goals, you should try to find a way to change their minds so that you can get on the right track. Fighting them will probably not succeed and they may continue to hinder your path. You need to show them that you have had a change of heart and work toward your goals. Once they are not impeding you, you can make it look like it is a seamless transition for you to move toward meeting your goals.
2007-07-04 19:49:51 · answer #2 · answered by cavassi 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know what you are saying.
Especially in this day and age, people are so cruel, that when they see someone down and out, instead of helping that person, they try to beat him into the ground.
Indeed our society is regressing to barbarianism.
The only solution to that is to trust God.
God is all powerful and controls all things - often when he intends to exalt someone, He puts them through a long period of trial first, to teach them humility and detachment, for to exalt without going through the humbling phase first, would only destroy the person, since the greater the edifice that God will construct, the deeper the foundation of humility that it must be built upon.
However, it is a good sign that you are still holding your head above water, given all that you are enduring.
.
2007-07-04 21:00:32 · answer #3 · answered by canx_mp058 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know what you mean. Maybe you could talk to them and ask them why they do this and why they don't support and encourage you. Also you have to try to ignore them. Don't listen to their negativity. I know it can be difficult but you have to stop worrying about what other people think about you, not let them get to you and do what you want to do. What about taking small steps like get a job save some money focus on what you want and believe it can happen. When you saved some money travel abroad. I think you should talk to a therapist as well about all these issues.
2007-07-05 00:12:13 · answer #4 · answered by xoɟ ʍous 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
are you looking for some reason to justify the emotions that are going on in your life. so you are a nut and that justifies you feeling like the world conspired against you. is that what you are looking for. i hope not.
2007-07-04 22:25:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
why not try AMERICA the land of oppurtunity.make your own life and find agirl who loves you
2007-07-04 19:41:20 · answer #6 · answered by Nyameba 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋