can you help me, how can i behave in this situation?

Question

my marriage is love marriage, 3 years back i got married, my wife doesn't know cooking and al. so i started cooking, washing and all householding words. Because i love her very much. before going to office i finish every thing. After my child's birth, we went to her mother's house and stayed there. her father is a slave to her mother, he doesn't speak even a single word against him. After going there, my wife started beating me, infront of her parents and friends. my friends are calling me as 'wife's servant'. what to do now, don't advice me to divorce. my wife is not ready to come out her mother house. i like to do anything for her. i like to be a servant to her. i am happy to be kicked by her, but infront anybody. How should i behave now?

Answer 1

It seems you enjoy the sadist nature of your wife & want to remain like a slave to her for rest of the life. Firstly you should not have posted such a question here as after reading all your facts many married ladies out here will try out the same on their husbands as your wife is doing just to check how far their husbands can become their slaves. Now coming to your problem which as for you is not so big issue but the only thing that troubles you that when your wife behaves badly with you in front of others specially her parents & friends, right? So tell her that let her behave as badly with you when you are alone with her but avoid such behavior in front of others, you want to take home with you as now she is with her parents & her mother has taught her all such bad habits as she herself is doing same with your father in law, so in such a case tell your wife to accompany you back home or you'll be getting another lady at home for yourself if not getting married to her then as in relation partner, just note her reactions to this statement, on this either she'll come with you or tell you to do anything you want, in the later case you get freedom to indulge in such in relationship if you can get any such person ready for such a relationship. This is the only non violent thing left with you to try out as you are against giving her divorce & she is not prepared to live with you at your place & her sadist nature is defamatory for you in front of others. I don't see why you should not try this line of action just to see her reaction. I could have suggested few hard slaps on her cheeks but that will be amounting to domestic violence for which she can complain against you, but in such a situation if there was any other self respecting husband he would have definitely given few hard slaps on the cheeks of such a wife, what happened regarding domestic violence & all would be seen later on.

Answer 2

Either u r over tolerant or physically weaker than her that u cannot even defend yourself & escape being beaten when she does so. Remember that a husband is EQUAL to wife in rights & NOT less than her as u yourself has made u so. Tell her & her parents in clear terms that u 'll not tolerate any unequal thing in family life any further & if she wants to continue those unequal habits, u 'll no longer take interest in living with her. You may threaten that if she does not come back to your house to live with family like a normal wife, she would be responsible for any damage in family relation & u will no longer live like a slave. Give her few month time like three months or so to come back to your house. The moment time passes & u don't ask or call her on phone in between, she will soon realise her mistake & come back to negotiate on your terms. Beating by wife can be stopped at once in no time. In love marriage mostly people are nearly blind in love so much that many bad qualities of boys & girls are overlooked out of overconfidence & so, remain unexplored before the engagement is finalized. Divorce is not the peaceful solution for every family problem rather that should be the last extreme option when every other better option ends , unfortunately. Loving wife very much is very good quality but that does not mean tolerate being beaten & insulted in public. I think she does not behave like a normal lady & does not understand the responsibilities of a wife. Both of u should sit together in solitude for few hours to discuss seriously the future plan of passing peaceful & happy family life together & in that meeting tell her that u both will have to follow the etiquettes of true husband & wife in practical life & nothing out of etiquettes will be done at all, if she still loves to live in the family. The only solution is to tell her clearly to behave exactly like a good wife & not like an enemy. Bullies bully only buliables & not all . U have made yourself bulliable. After all, both are educated & this is simple to resolve. U may be loving her by words & not in actions in all respects otherwise this problem would not have arisen & she would not have dared to take you to her parent's house for long time. Do u go to places of worship together ? Best solution of any domestic problem comes from within the house, not outside. This must be known to both of you. Try coolly & carefully the best way u can. Good luck.

Answer 3

Ok Mr. Slave. Give me two simple answers.

What if your wife goes and sleep with another guy in front of you, what will you do? Uh!

Are you a man?

Dear loving someone dear does not mean that the opposite person should take advantage of you. Doing household things or pressing wife's leg, doing each others work is normal thing any husband who loves his wife will do, I too cook in my house etc etc but my wife will never go beyond me when there is some manly decisions to make. If I say no means its a final verdict, obviously she has her say but its applicable when she is right.

I love my wife may be more then you but still she will never degrade me nor I will degrade in front of our children leave alone anybody else.

Taking a divorce or leaving her is not the answer. The thing is you have to be a husband not a henpack husband. Nor you make you wife a henpack wife.

Answer 4

Hahahahahaha A masochist?. Be bold man. Married life is like a corporate entity. Just think of a company in which the subordinate is bossing over the superior. Will the smooth functioning of that company is possible. Likewise in case of life also there must be a hierarchy. It does not mean that others must be slaves for one person. But there should be somebody for decision strategy and others should support to accomplish the same. In your case only emotional strategy is working out, which does not have long life. One day you will become worn out of present style treatment. Then you will not have any option, but to suffer more worst situation.

See every thing will not go as per our wish, but doing nothing to correct it and cry is not worthwhile. By keeping all the love and affection you have the right to create your own life. Speak boldly, act boldly to correct it. Otherwise you will have to face more. If you are ready. I am sorry.

Answer 5

Love Psychic Margo Masters
Returns Lost Love, Restore Passion

Call For your Free consultation Today

[phone]

http://www.psychicmargo.net

Answer 6

You are a brave man who has declared your true picture. I want to tell you that in this society there is none who is not a servant for his wife but some of them declare publicly like you and some of them doing behind the curtain but you should prepare her to read some books if you agree I may suggest you to read a Little book which may help you a lot. If agree pls watch the book sanskar padyati written by Maharishi Dayanand Sarswati and Do Saheliyon ki varta jo ki Satya Prakashan Mathura ki book hai

Answer 7

if i were in u'r position , damn ! ! ... u'r wife would hav really had it from me... listen dude... i guess u'r from south india ..am an indian 2 ... let me tell u frankly... i appreciate u'r luv for u'r wife ...
but u must be really sick to have a submissive attitude...
how cud u like the fact of being kicked by u'r wife ?... u said tat she doesn't know 2 cook . fine , but y do u have 2 do all house hold works like washing , cleaning etc...etc... she's your wife...
she has 2 fulfill the duty of a " wife " & " mother "... u'r her husband... u have to fulfill the duties of a " husband "... i am not telling tat u should not help u'r wife ... am not telling that u should not do house hold works.... but waat i am telling is u can help u'r wife in doing all this kind of work ... but u dont have 2 shoulder the entire responsibility of u'r wife... its her duty & she has 2 do it... as a husband u have 2 only help her out in her work &
co-operate with her tats it ... not more... the main reason 4 this problem is ...u gave u'r wife too much ( more than waat was needed in the beginning ,& she's controlling u rite now )...

dont do the same fault again dude ... am really sorry abt u'r attitude ...

Answer 8

You married a spoiled brat and you willingly let it go out of hand.

Perhaps you can answer this question and then make up your mind. There is a child who is beaten by his parent but he is afraid to be abandoned. So the child figures as long as his parent beats him up at home, he can take it and he prays that he won't be humiliated in public or seen by his friends like that.

Answer 9

ask her if she loves you truly, tell her if she needs you then she should come along with you, tell her that you are missing her and you want to stay alone just with her and your kid, talk to her, tell her how embarrassed you are when she treats you bad in front of others, and dont feel bad to check her when she is wrong, too much of showering of affection is also dangerous. its not bad scolding her when she does something wrong but dont encourage it, dont allow her to be with her mom too much, she might be the one responsible for all her behaviour. and start making her to do the work this is not good for a personal and social life you can help her in doing the work but you cant be doing everything all by yourself. this will lead her in doing wrong things too so be cautious and check her when she does something like that.

Answer 10

They say Love is Blind, but too much love given blindly, spoils everything. U are a man, and u must be strict. U should have been strict from the day of marriage, but still it is not too late. Be strict, be fair, and everything will be okay.