How do I get my 15 month old baby to stop hitting me?

Question

My 15 month old waves his arms flailingly when he's upset. Likeone time scolded him for climbing the chair, he got upset, shook his head and waived his hands in the air. Unfortunately, I carried him while he was having this episode so I got slapped. I know he doesn't mean to hurt me but am just scared that would develope the habit of hurting people when upset. Is this just a phase that he's going through and will out grow? I have l already started telling him off and saying very firmly 'NO' or ' Don't hurt mommy!' but he still does it. I don't know where he got this from.

Answer 1

This is typical behavior for a child this age. That doesn't mean it is acceptable behavior.
At a quiet time when you and your son are relaxed. Tell him that it is not good to act like he does when he gets frustrating.
And tell him `that you want him to come up with new ideas of how to handle the times when he wants to throw a fit. Give your ideas too. Like tell him to find words to express his frustration. Kids this age understand more than you realize
Also, tell him that when he acts that way you will walk away and not talk to him until he is done.. Don't lose sight of him, but don't look concerned, don't let him push your buttons. Don't reward him for his fit. Don't comfort him. Just be matter of fact. and tell him that if he starts up again with his fit that you will just leave him be until he calms down again. You need to be consistat. that is important. If he knows that you cave in eventually

Next time he throws a fit stick to your plan. You are teaching him how to manage his emotions. You dont need to deny him emotions but it is your job as a parent to teach him to be a well adjusted adult.

Answer 2

I think he got it from someone. He simply immitated or did anyone try teaching him this way as a sort of fun?
Even if he's still young, in child psychology, there should be a reward and punishment. When do you start bending a tree? when it's too old and it's already hard to bend? while it's still young right? No one should try to laugh when he does this thing coz he might think that it's okay and it's good. Yeah, it was right that you said "no" or "dont hurt mommy", and show him in your face that you're upset or that you're hurt. If he does this often times, you should try to spank her a little, for example if he used his hands to hurt someone, give him a little spank in her hands. I know that you love him, but doing it doesnt mena that you dont love him but it's a way of telling him that it was wrong and you're doing it out of love. I learned in psychology that if a kid makes a mistake, you shouldn't wait for tomorrow to scold him up. Do it right at that moment, and after that you can explain to him why you were upset at him. so he can understand otherwise if you dont explain it to him, he'd get confused why mom was upset. But at this time, your baby is still young, so just take it slowly. Remember, it isn't good also when you spoil the rod.
But so far, i guess, you're doing good as a mom. I hope you won't just spoil him coz eventually you'll suffer the consequences when you can't stop him anymore.

Answer 3

My son had tantrums around this age. He would throw himself on the floor, start crying, wave his arms and kick. He just turned 2 and he no longer has these types of tantrums. ( knock on wood ... l.o.l )

I did 3 things. Depending on why he threw a fit in the first place.

1. Ignore it then he would stop after 3 minutes or so.

2. Firmly state his behaviour is unacceptable in a low tone then attract his attention elsewhere.
ie. wash his face, wash his hands, get a book, get some toys, anything fun and distracting.

3. If he did something naughty then you need the naughty chair.

Whatever you do never give into his tantrums if he wants something. Stay strong and consistent. ( even in public )

Answer 4

It's just a stage, my son went through it, if you are firm and consistent and give him a time out everytime he will eventually stop, try carrying him while holding his arms that way he doesn't hurt anyone. For some reason toddlers go through this stage, it's mostly out of frustration and they need to learn right from wrong at an early age, it's better that he learns it now than later, i've seen many 5 and 6 year olds act this way, because it wasn't dealt with right away. Sound like your doing the right thing.

Answer 5

I have a 16 month old and she starting to do this "throwing" thing. My personal advice to you is when he starts throwing these fits and throwing his arms around.. Do NOT pick him up. Let him sit there tillt he fit is over. Very calmly take his arm after he is done and put him in time out. I know how hard it is at 15 months to put them in a "time out" but it can be done. Either in a corner, on the couch, on a chair, or even putting him in his room. Time outs are supposed to be in minutes of their age. Since he's 15 months it'd be one minute. Might not sound like a long time, but it sure is to them. As far as saying "don't hurt mommy".. He might understand what you're saying, but I doubt it. He won't understand the severity of it. I've learned to give my kids a look when they know they weren't supposed to do something or they're doing something bad. They know, they stop.. They usually cry cause I didn't speak any words but they know it means no. Someone might not be teaching him this but he is picking up on it from somewhere. Our son picked up on my husbands wrestling and started doing things he shouldn't have been doing. Solved by not watching it around him. I'm not sure if you "spank" him or not but, he could be picking it up from any punishment he's getting. Or punishment other kids are getting from their parents. It's crazy how smart kids really are. I hope this helps! Good luck

Answer 6

our son is 16 months and he also went through a phase where he would hit mommy and daddy. (thankfully he never hit anyone else's child!!)

If we were at home when he hit us we would put him in "time out" for one minute by holding him on our laps, facing out, and we would hold his hands still. He would cry and squirm and we would just calmly repeat to him that "hitting is a no-no"

If we were out in public and were carrying him we would just hold his hands in our hand for about a minute and tell him "that's a no-no, you don't hit!"

It seemed to be really effective for him. We dealt with the hitting problem for maybe two weeks, we were very consistent with our "punishment" and we made sure the consequences immediately followed his naughty actions. finally one day it was like it clicked in his head and he realized he wasn't supposed to hit. (thankfully!!)

Answer 7

put him in a noddie chair or car seat and in a chair put it in a corner make sure no toys around him or tv on and if he cries say when you stop crying i will get you out but DO NOT YELL no mattter how much you want to just talk in a stern voice. to begin with put them in for a 1 min. and if they don't cry take them out after the min is over. if they cry add 30 sec.

Answer 8

Sounds to me like he needs a good swat so that he knows who's boss. Good luck
Toni Lynne

Answer 9

maybe a past life. who knows where he got it. but he needs discipline. babies do whats effective. so since he is hitting you:

1. you need to not give in no matter what. if he is asking for soemthing dont give it to him. or ignore him.

2. you need to move away so that he cannot hit you.

3. not to treat him like a dog, but if he is hitting you you need to restrain his arms. let him know who's boss. dont hit him or hurt him, but prevent him from hitting you, in a way that he knows what he is doing is wrong.

Answer 10

i would pin his arms to his sides until he calms down and put him in his crib in his room for a time-out if he needs one.