I would think that people who view porn feel they need a sexual release. Wouldn't having more sex with your spouse provide this release and therefore remove the desire to view porn. Wouldn't it be healthier to give a spouse an outlet like sex than just telling them that viewing porn makes you feel bad? Shouldn't the sexual needs of the spouse be accounted for?
Is it as simple as have more sex with your spouse to avoid them from watching porn?
If your spouse does prefer to watch porn over actual sex what does that suggest of your skills as a lover?
Can increased sex with one's spouse get rid of the desire to watch porn?
2007-07-03 10:41:09 · 43 answers · asked by snack_daddy10 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The amount of sex usually has nothing to do with porn. My husband & I were having sex 3-5 times a day & were into swinging & he still looked @ & used porn. Its just part of being a man. Most women think men go to porn because they are not enough to the man. It leaves the female feeling ugly, useless, & not wanting sex. Over time I have learned that its not me.
Anyhow its nothing to do with if they want porn over sex with you or your skills for that fact in most cases. I know men who like porn, but use it to better their partner. Others use it to spice up the bedrooom. Sometimes porn is a good way to see taboo things you & your partner may not do normally.
I rather have anyone pop in a porn then cheat anyway. Isnt that really what matters?? You are still having sex. Just be happy. Its what people do. Maybe talk to the person & let then know how it makes you feel. (A porn is not cheatting, its an image of someone they will never meet. If porn is cheating so is shooting a horny glance @ someone who turned your head.) Also, if the porn is taken over sex, they may have a deeper issue. You can be addicted. Try not to over think it tho. Im sure it will be fine. Just talk the the person. If youre like most people get, you are seeing it as more of an issue then it is. ( I dont mean that rude, Im one of those people LOL) If you can have sex with them, then it should be easy to talk to them how you feel about their porn use. Good Luck! Hope it helps.
2007-07-03 10:58:17 · answer #1 · answered by Raven Punk 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
More sex is not the cure for a sexual addiction. Some men will continue to rely on porn even if offered more sex with their spouses. Its an addiction. It has nothing to do with the spouses sexual skills. I know a woman who was just in this position, her husband was addicted to porn to the point that he prefered that over real sex with her. So she began having affairs to get her release. During these affairs, as you would imagine, she learned a myriad of new sex skills. However, her husband continued to rely on porn for his sexual release. Too much porn leads to addiction.
2007-07-04 02:38:47 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes having sex with people who are addicted to porn is not enough. After the momentary sexual release, they'll be back to their old vice. A normal woman cannot do to him all the nasty things that the porn women do on the internet or wherever. That will still leave him craving or wanting for that.
People who are addicted to porn need serious counseling to remind them of the value of sex in relationships. Sex is a bonding experience not some animal activity that should just be done and forgotten about.
That's why they say that whores ruin everything for regular women. They make it hard for real women!
2007-07-03 10:49:41 · answer #3 · answered by bluepassion_life 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hmm, this one is hard because I am the sexual agressor in my relationship. Sex is much better for a person and a relationship, but many do need porn. The need to watch porn is not just based on how active one's sex life is. People turn to porn because they are bored or they are addicted and can't get enough. You had so many questions I hope this helped. Maybe have her watch porn with ya and see if it helps both your sex lives and throw the porn away.
2007-07-03 10:51:53 · answer #4 · answered by Doll_Partz 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't help to tell your partner that him/her watching porn makes you feel bad or not hott enough for them... trust me, it doesn't work. SO I actually went to the adult book store with him, and we picked out a porn together, and it has actually brought good and bad to our relationship. firstly, we have lots more sex than we used to... like I used to always want sex, but he rarely did.... and it brought bad, because now he's so obssessed with it he has started looking at it at his work, and is now in BIG trouble for that. He's in the Army so he's haveing to stay in the barracks, and we don't get to do anything on the 4th of July:(! I'm not sure if I regret allowing this to be in our house now because I'm getting all the sex I want, but then again, he's too addicted.
Shouldn't the sexual needs of the spouse be accounted for? Yes, they should, and like I mentioned above, porn actually helped our sex life.
Is it as simple as have more sex with your spouse to avoid them from watching porn? Nope!!!!! I tried, didn't work.
If your spouse does prefer to watch porn over actual sex what does that suggest of your skills as a lover? It's really sad!! It hurts the ones you love. But what we do is watch porn, do our foreplay during this, and then turn it off and have hott sex!!!
Can increased sex with one's spouse get rid of the desire to watch porn? Once again, not in most cases!
Hope all this helps!
2007-07-03 10:51:09 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No and i just posted a question on the whole girls against porn thing after asking a question on how to spice up my love life with my husband i really shoudn't answereing this cuz i don't know what the big deal is about porn i see it as something a guy does but then again i also have alot of guys friends and when it comes down to it i allways take the mans side
2007-07-03 11:01:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're turning the issue back on the woman. Not fair.
Scenario...woman marries man who is already a porn addict and subsidizes his porn sex life with real life a few times a week, but still "uses" porn more than has sex with wife. Hides porn from wife, never suggests wife watch with him, lies about porn after she finds out, hides the porn in sneakier places, makes it a cat and mouse game, continues to lie even when asked directly with computer evidence from that very morning on several occasions. New wife is completely baffled. NOW she has an issue with porn because it is coupled with sneakiness, dishonesty, and she can't understand why a man so loving is suddenly betraying her with lies.
Is it still her fault when she was willing and able and the ink on the marriage license wasn't even dry yet and she had NEVER turned him down?
Get a clue...Stop turning blame onto all women who have issues with porn. You haven't been in my shoes.
2007-07-03 12:30:17 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
We have porn in our house and my hubby rarley watches it at all and that is because i give it to him when he wants it, even if i don't feel good, so, i guess that answers your question...having alot of sex removes the desire to watch it so much yes...it is healthier to have sex than to watch porn to much....if your spouse watches porn more than have actual sex it doesn't mean your a bad lover that means he has a promblem, no one should pick porn over the real thing if they do they really need help yes, i really believe the more sex you have the less porn is needed,,,talk to him about it and tell him it's bothering you, tell him you'll try new things...
2007-07-03 10:46:37 · answer #8 · answered by Nita and Michael 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Most men a visual people and enjoy looking at porn, no matter how often/little they have sex with their spouse. It would bother me more if my husband would much rather watch porn than have sex with me. Then I would know there was a problem.
2007-07-03 11:03:48 · answer #9 · answered by DelinquentGurl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my husband wouldnt need porn because i would do everything i could to keep him satisfied. i think sex is an important part of a marriage and most people take advantage and let it slip away. variety in a marriage as far sex is important. you have to keep it interesting because porn is always the extreme in a sense. for some people nothing could stop them from watching porn...they need to get a life if more sex doesnt help that lil side activity lol
2007-07-03 10:45:23 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋