Men how do you separate sex from love? Help me understand.?

Question

If it's really separate, then why do you mind if your wife or girlfriend sees someone else?

Ladies' replies are very welcome as well.

Answer 1

I would have to say that for a lot of men, not all, there can be sex without love..guys focus is on the act of sex and not necessarily the feelings involved in the act..as far as seeing their wife/GF with someone else, I would say that is a pure ego thing..just an opinion.

Answer 2

To me there is a distinct difference. Sex is the act of satisfying hormonal urges that humans have and that are left over from the days of an animalistic need to procreate enough to assure the survival of our species. Sex is best done alone these days. Love is an emotion, a desire to please someone, to make them happy, to make them feel wanted. Making love (as cheesey as that phrase may be) is the physical expression of that emotion. Love can be shared and felt between any two people and in many different forms.

Now is when I become the exception. If my wife were the type of person that understood and could feel true love, then I would not be upset if she were to express that emotion in a physical way with someone she loved. She isn't so that is not a factor in my life. However, physically expressing the emotion is just that, an expression of the emotion. Just like a hug or a kiss on the cheek is seen by society in general.

The difference between the physical expression of an emotion and marriage is the desire to spend and share your life with someone. Just because you have that desire with one person does not mean you can not feel or (in my mind) express love for another. The problem is when the desire to express an emotion becomes the desire to share your *whole* life with the other person (if you are married to someone else).

So, as you see, in my mind, sex, making love, and marriage are three separate and distinct things and although there maybe more than one involved in a relationship, none exclusively go with another.

Answer 3

They do, I don't know how they do, but they do. Just like I don't know why woman crave romance and men don't. Many years ago(15) kids were young, my husband worked swing shift and we kind of hit a stale mate in regards to sex. We both wanted it more, but were blaming the other for the lack of it. After a heated "conversation" about the subject, I realized I wanted the romance before the sex, and he didn't feel much like romance untill he got the sex. Complete opposites.
I think the reason they get upset when their wife sees someone else is because they know we don't seperate the two, if we are with someone it is for more than sex.

Answer 4

Love and Sex is not separate. Sex is the essential part of being loved or loving someone. It is the physical way to show your love and touch and desire.

Separating Sex (Lust) from the Sex (Marriage) is easy. Lust is for physical fulfillment, it nevers provides emotinal satisfaction arising out of sex. It gives only physical relaxsation/satisfaction.

Sex (Marrigae) provides you with a partner more willing and the one more loving. Partnership in sexual act is both ways fully and it also strengthen the relationship between a couple.

Coming to third part of seeing another girl or man is a human nature, everyone does it,every one wants it and everyone likes it. No issues in that till limits are maintained and marriage is not made to suffer. Again common agreement between couple plays an important role.

Answer 5

I don't understand the question. It's not just men who separate sex and love, you do too. I mean, you love your father, but you don't want to have sex with him, right?

Well, if you can love someone and not want to have sex with him, I don't see why it's hard for you to understand that you can have sex with someone and not love the person, or at least not involve feelings of love in it.

My wife "sees" other people every day, so I don't know what that means. Date? Fall in love with? Have sex with? All of the above? Even if I can (and sometimes do) separate love from sex, it seems completely reasonable for me to say that I expect my wife not to have a romance nor sex with anyone but me. I do the same.

Answer 6

well its an interesting question, but i don't know that anyone separates sex from love, because in my opinion, sex is part of love. But why do guys mind if there girl goes seeing someone else, because it means that, that girl isn't interested in the guy anymore. If you were really happy with the guy... why would you look at others?

Answer 7

For men, sex is a follow up action of an impulse, much of which is generated by visual. So men may respond to their wives or porn video/magazine. They just have the big urge to act on it until relief. But just like the animal kingdom, the alpha males have territories to protect and that include the females. That's how men are wired. There was a National Geographic episode that recorded a group of apes. There was the alpha male and he had all the females. Another male not strong enough to challenge the alpha got horny and tried a sneak sniff with one of the females. The alpha saw it and beat that male to death.

Answer 8

LOL!!!

I laughed at the first answer......sex is only for married couples??? I've been having sex for years and years without marriage! About time SOMEONE told me! LMFAO!!!!!!

Most married men are thinking about other women when they are with their wives by the way. LOL!!!! They CAN separate love and sex...so can a lot of us women.

Answer 9

Sorry, but not ALL men are pigs so I'm not really able to separate love and sex.
FYI, some women are even bigger pigs than men so you might think of opening up your question to women as well.

Answer 10

Men and women's brains are made differently. It goes back to when we were evolving. Men were programed to mate and spread their seed to as many females as possible. Women were programed to find the best mate to raise a family with. That's why women like a man she feels protected by. That's why men respond so well to visual stimulation. Separating sex and love is an instinct to men. We can't help it.