I have always worked, ever since he was 3 months old. I am now only working 3 days but leaving in the morning on those days. He starts crying the night before i have to work, telling me how much he will miss me. He wakes up all night long those nights and then in the morning seems to know right when i am leaving and jumps out of bed and chases me to the car, crying hysterically. I am not sure what to do anymore but it is affecting his sleep and my work status. Not sure what to do anymore!!!
2007-07-03 03:26:05 · 17 answers · asked by Kerry D 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It's just a phase. There is not much you can do but it will pass. Maybe you can call him while you are at work. That way he will have something to look forward to.
2007-07-03 03:30:01 · answer #1 · answered by thesweetestthings24 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The behavior of your son is normal. I think the problem is that you put him in his bed by saying that in the morning you will not there, and frightened him with this. Anyways how could he knows that you are going to leave him? I do not know who is with him when you are at work, but if that person is good enough (and why not?) then I would not say any word about your going to work, I would behave normally (he can be very sensitive for any change in your behavior and mood!) and when he wakes up in the morning the person who is with him may tell him that, you are at work, and will come home in the afternoon. Maybe you can "send" him a trifle, and of course some kisses. Also, this person may say that you went away to get some present for him. Do not forget: for him a half of a pencil is present. You should stay at the level of his logical ability. Good luck!
2007-07-03 04:36:35 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi...
my grandson was the same way when his mother left him with a babysitter -- didn't matter if it was someone he loved and trusted, even me or his other grandmother.
he had a rocky first few years of life, and he heard a lot of arguing and "i'm going to leave you for good" from his parents.
could something have happened to cause your son to feel as if you are abandoning him? you know, things affect kids dramatically sometimes.
if you have to work, then i suppose you might want to try and get to the bottom of this problem? have you asked him why he is frightened when you leave? he may have seen something on television to cause this feeling... it might not be anything he heard or saw at home.
perhaps you could check at the library or your local book store for a children's book about this sort of thing? there are so many written for children, in a way they will understand...
human beings are certainly complex, and we all have our share of anxiety and fear.
i suppose that trying to get to the bottom of this, would be your best bet. and i hope it works out. i know you're very concerned for the little guy.
take care, ok?
2007-07-03 03:33:44 · answer #3 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him although you leave for work, you always come back home to give him lots of hugs and kisses. If he is left with a child care provider, ask them to meet you at the door so they can holdthe childs hand, and have your son wave good bye and blow you a kiss. This will keep in busy thinking of how to do those things better.
He will be ok,you just have to not allow him to make you feel andlook guilty. That is what he sees and feels from you.
Once your happy and content, he will be.
2007-07-03 03:34:35 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG! You poor dear!! I went through the very same thing with my daughter when she was in the 4th grade. I talked to the school counselor and her teachers. We discussed what was going on and how best we could work together to make going to school, the sitters and my going to work easier on her.
What we came up with was this.....
I would send her cards to school and the sitters by US mail. This always made her happy and made her feel special too.
She was allowed to call me from school during recess or lunch and I would schedule a time to call her during the day making sure I wasn't disrupting her studies or her class.
This is a REAL problem. Don't shrug it off!
The death of my mother is what triggered my daughters separation anxiety. Has something happened to set your child's off?
Get him into counseling at school. My daughter ended up helping the school counselor with grief/support groups for kids that had lost loved ones! It was truly a great experience for her and helped a great deal!!
God bless and good luck! I hope this helps.
2007-07-03 03:44:53 · answer #5 · answered by justme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who's with him while you are working? Maybe he has an issue there. Most kids do go through a separation anxiety, but not usually when they are used to it. Maybe get a tape recorder that is voice activated and leave it some where so you can listen to it. I would be concerned if I was you too. This just seems a bit extreme.
2007-07-03 03:33:43 · answer #6 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
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2015-01-28 15:10:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, it might be a good idea to be certain you are correctly identifying the dis-ease. Are you certain it is "separation anxiety" which would be a baseless fear of your leaving? Or is it possibly some based fear of what will happen while you are gone? Where does he stay when you are gone and what has changed in that circumstance? Be very certain of the diagnosis before treatment.
2007-07-03 03:37:03 · answer #8 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe you should try change his schedule the night be for you go to work. Making that night fun and something to look forward too. Also you could try when I get back from work you and I can watch a movie with popcorn or something fun to give him something fun to look forward too. Who are you leaving him with? Something might be going on when you are away from him. Maybe set up a camcorder just to check?
2007-07-03 03:34:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most children do go through a separation anxiety at some point. You could go and make one of those stuffed animals with him and kiss the heart - tell him that this means that mommy is always with him and try to make a game out of it. Think of things to do when you get home...
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2007-07-03 03:30:10 · answer #10 · answered by Animal Helper 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋