my sister in law keeps trying to break me and husband up saying that Im try to keep him away. And saying lies like I tried to report her and her children to C.P.S. Last year she asked to borrow my car for a trip I didnt want to say no so I said my car needed new tires. she and her boyfriend said they would put new tires before they took the trip. when i got my car back i found out that they put used tires, the service guy told me that I should not continue to drive my car without new tires. I'm tired of the bs. She makes me so angry that I have not spoken with her for almost a year. Do you think im over reacting. Do you think I should just let it go?
2007-07-02 15:57:22 · 24 answers · asked by mysteriously me 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If I were on your situation I might feel the same way too. Sometimes we need to be hard and show them how we feel to let them know that we don't like what they did to us but it doesn't mean we dont care about them anymore. But to be fair, since you did them a favor they should take extra careful of that and take responsibility of the things that they borrowed even if its there brother's or sisters. Show them than you are mad and someday they will realize they did wrong and so they might say sorry in return. And hopefully when that day comes you are fine again. Good luck!!
2007-07-02 16:05:31 · answer #1 · answered by elyzia 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
God says you must forgive everyone for everything. That doesn't mean that you should lay down and be a door mat.
You are angry at yourself too because you didn't want her to take your car, but you didn't come right out and say "I don't want you to take my car." That is what you should have done.
Instead you lied and said it needed new tires. There is nothing wrong with telling someone they can't drive your car. You were just afraid you would look bad if you said no.
I would imagine you let a lot of people walk all over you. You should stand up for yourself. Forgive your sister in law and yourself and don't let her Or anyone else have anything you don't want to give them.
She can get mad if she wants, but you will feel better knowing you stood up for yourself.
2007-07-02 23:41:10 · answer #2 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
God comes first, and if you really listen to what he has to say, you will hear...Family is verrrrrry important. And sometimes
they will hurt you very bad. YOU HAVE TO TURN THE OTHER CHEEK> You never know what might happen in the next hour, or day coming. That person could be in an accident.
ANd this would mean that you never made things right. YOU,
be the leader, reach your hand out and lead this person. YOU do the right thing. God will see, and things will change if you believe. This person is in need of help from someone who loves them. If you turn the other cheek, and live for god, you will be amazed of the things this does to a persons life.
You will finally feel at peace , and The things that seem to hurt so bad, won't hurt so bad any more. What i'm saying is.....
If you believe in god, sit now and pray about this. Then, you need to pick up the phone dial this person. The first thing you need to say,,,,is IM sorry for everything. Please, lets work this out. Let us be friends. Your brother ,,,,,,,,and I need you to be a part of our life. I love my husband, with all of my heart and, i'm willing to make a comprimise, Please forgive me, you are my family and i love you.
2007-07-02 23:15:05 · answer #3 · answered by diane 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The used tire thing is not a big deal. If they put brand new ones on there, you'd be the one who got the most benefit from them. It was nice of you to let them borrow your car, and they did their part by putting safer tires on there, even if they were used.
If you don't get along with your in-laws, then i would try to avoid them, but be civil when you must see them. Your husband needs to be able to visit them sometimes, cuz they are flesh and blood. If he visits them without you sometimes, so be it. That's common.
2007-07-02 23:05:47 · answer #4 · answered by PH 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you're doing nothing wrong, your husband knows it and you shouldn't have to worry. His sister is obviously worthless and wants to cause trouble for you, so why not let your husband know that you don't appreciate her treating you this way and ask that he talk to her about it. If your husband won't stick up for you to his own family, you and your husband have a problem that needs to be addressed. Either she will grow up one day, or she'll cause enough trouble with everyone that she'll be pushed away from other family members because of her actions. Make sure your husband understands where you're coming from and is on your side and ignore the drama she stirs. It's not illegal for you to tell someone 'No'. You're not wrong for denying someone the use of the vehicle you are paying for. If your husband or his family can't see that that's overstepping, then they might all be crazies! She's obviously a user and it may be best for you to keep away from her. She will cause her own troubles, don't worry. Just make sure you and your husband are seeing eye-to-eye and release yourself from the drama she's creating. Good Luck!
2007-07-02 23:11:12 · answer #5 · answered by lys 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No, don't let it go. Stand up for yourself. Don't do it out of the sight of your husband, either. Make sure he's a part of this conversation.
Nothing is worse than a she said / she said conversation. Second and third-hand information has a tendency to become breached. Don't let any more time go by.
Good Luck.
2007-07-02 23:11:19 · answer #6 · answered by DAWN 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I say let it go.. hurt feeling only fester and cause more harm than good.. but proceed with wisdom..you know how she is so stand your ground and don't let her use you or abuse your relationship. You don't have to loan her or give her anything.. and the people who know you and care about you want believe the lies she spreads. Plus you don't have to have an active part in each others lives.. but it helps the rest of family if you can at least be social.
2007-07-02 23:04:08 · answer #7 · answered by donna 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well first of all it was not there responsibility to put new tires on your vehicle even if they did say they would put new ones on. afterall it is your car and your wear and tear on the tires. then if you did call the cps then that is good if there was abuse going on. no child should have to be abused even if the abuser is a relative.
2007-07-02 23:07:39 · answer #8 · answered by feb29 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you have a problem. What does you husband say about all this. You should stand by your husband but do not need to take her crap. Under no circumstance get in a big fight with your husband about this. Do what ever you and your husband decide together to do.
2007-07-02 23:04:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Seems your husband is playing right along and he should be the one to put his foot down first and if that dont work then you can step in... its better to stay away from those kind of people anyway your husband can visit his brother on his own.....
2007-07-02 23:13:13 · answer #10 · answered by Renee 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋