Why is everyone so quick to get a divorce these days?

Question

It seems like no one is willing to work at their marriages. The phrase "til death do us part" should be replaced by "until you screw up or I find someone that I like a little bit better". I just don't understand. When did marriage become something that could be thrown away like yesterday's garbage?

Answer 1

I think for the most part we have become a me first society my needs are all that matter, and with this mentality there is no room for compassion and understanding.

The idea of having to work hard for something is just to painful add in the fact that divorce is easy and I think you have your answer.

Answer 2

Aaahh! A sign of the times. I don't think that people realize what a commitment it is (on all levels) to be married. There are too many secret truths about marriage that have always been taboo. Now days, people enter into a marriage with the mentality that if it doesn't work out . . . there is always divorce. As a society, we are about bigger and better and keeping up with the Jones'. If something is no longer working we junk it and get a new one.
If only most of them new how hard it was going to be . . . they would wait. There is a misconception that marriage creates love and happiness and fills a need.
My favorite quote applies here. "The problem with doing something right the first time is . . . Nobody appreciates how difficult it really was."

Answer 3

In brief: Community propety laws, and women's rights. Not that either of these things are right or wrong. In the 1950's people rarely got divorced, because women were so badly repressed. Now it's quite the opposite, and so there is horrible divorce everywhere. Is it good? Better? Worse? I can't honestly say. I think the issue is, for whom?

For some women, it's way better. Escaping from an abusive relationship is essential. For other women, making it big in business has been a bonanza. For many women, half the assets, the kids and child support is way better than living with the dead weight guy. But for other women, for the children, for families, I'm not really sure. For a bazillion financially wiped out men? For most guys, divorce is simply a disaster.

The net for all people? Very hard to say. You're asking a very hard, but very good question. I wish more people would think it over very carefully.

Answer 4

I know what you are saying. It used to be an embarrassment if you were divorced now its lets see how many times one can divorce. lol
Marriage is tough bot worth the trouble. Unless you are cheated on, abused or other bad thing divorce should not be so easy to get. If it was made hard to do and not just written off like a grocery list then maybe people would think about it a bit more.

Answer 5

I was married 27 years, for 'the kids sake'. I was a door mat. When my first daughter joined the Navy and my younger one was a senior in high school I filed for divorce.

My older daughter, finally after 10 years has a real life, love and a husband. My younger one learned watching her parents divorce that a woman can stand up for herself and expect to be treated with love and kindness. She is happily married with two little boys!

Marriage is to be entered into equally. Previously, it was just a fact of life, women endured 'infidelity' and 'abuse' to avoid the shame of divorce.

There are good marriages out there; love is not just thrown out with the garbage. If you are in love; both people are willing to work out the problems. It is a two way street, if not it is not worth fighting a losing war!

Answer 6

i think it starts back with our parents generation, for them to sleep together (or even just have a relationship) society expected them to be married, so they rushed into it, often it was because the girl was pregnant, and even more often they had not lived out of home littlelone been in a full time relationship so they didnt have the skills to deal with what was happening, when the initial attraction was gone from the relationship (seriously who hasnt decided after 6-8 months that sometimes a person just isnt right) they had nothing so divorce was the only option, and its only in the last 20 or so years that women who have been brave enough to leave a relationship have been able to divorce and not bring shame on thier family (yes even in the "western civilised" world). often in the old days people would just put up with bad marridges because they had to. i think the problem these days is people still rush into relationships thinking that the next step they need to take is a wedding(society still pressures people in this way), i think there should be a law passed that you have to have lived with a person for at least a year or 2 before you get married thats the only way people are going to take it with the seriousness it deserves

Answer 7

What happens when a wife of 10 years comes home and says "I want a divorce" - and you work and try everything you can - counseling - everything she asks of you - to then have her say after you have spent nearly a year and untold amounts of money "I don't care what you do...I am getting a divorce anyway?"

You then find out about the guy she had been seeing for two years - and the money you gave to the counselor - she never attended "her" sessions, but was with her boyfriend?

I agree that marriage - actually people in general have become disposable - but what would you do in a similar situation?

Answer 8

Because people get into relationships and get married before they really know themselves... too many marriages are based on false pretenses, and on trying to live up to pressures that come from familial or societal influences.

In addition, too few people actually have a clue what LOVE and COMMITMENT are. They "fall in love" which is really based on attraction, and expect that romantic sentimental nonsense to persist over decades... that is not reality. If you ever talk to couples that have been together for decades, you'll find that they have fallen in and out of romantic love a few times over the years; BUT their devotion to each other and dedication to the marriage is what gets them through the challenging times.

Answer 9

My cousin and his wife are seperated. About three weeks after they got married she was yelling divorce. She wanted the married life but at the same time wanted the single life. So right now they've been seperated a year and she got pregnant by some other guy. I don't know the whole story as to why things didn't work or whatever went on there.

Answer 10

Sometime in the 60's when women found out they could support themselves, and didn't have to put up with a controlling husband. No, really. That is when the divorce rates started to climb.

I think a LOT of times now...people marry too young. If you marry at 18, you barely know yourself. You WILL grow as a person, and often times...the person you grow into is not compatible with the person your spouse grows into.