My Best friend in the world is planning to move in with me from another state. I'm 25, he's 26, he's divorced, and I'm headed that direction. I have two kids that aren't living with me anymore, and he has an infant daughter. I just left the military after 6 years of service, we've been friends since we first got in the military together. I'm going through a traumatic time in my life right now and I need some one to lean on, because I'm in a new area with no friends, and I've cut out everyone else in my life at this point. We've always been there for each other, and we have a lot of the same interests (girls, guns, trucks, fightin') lol that kind of stuff. But we are both very very strong headed, stubborn and out spoken, When we disagree, we disagree big time but always seem to deflect our aggression away from each other. ............. Getting to the point........ Can we still reamain friends and live as roommates? I mean is that possible? Or is this an explosion waiting to happen?
2007-07-02 13:46:36 · 10 answers · asked by Luke 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Man I knew I should have said that lol, Not offended, but hell ******* no. Not gay, never questioned it, can't be around it, almost homo phobe type of not gay. And he's even more so that way. Country boys don't ever go gay, I don't care what movies you see. God he'd kick my *** just for asking a question that seemed gay.
2007-07-02 13:57:31 · update #1
You know thats true about what yellow sista said, we both deflect everything because we care to much about being friends. And we're not the least bit afraid of speaking our minds about anything. There's a huge level of trust between us that I never even had with my wife. But let me be clear, our openness doesn't mean we share everything. We don't talk about sex life stuff, and I'd prefer it stayed that way. Just too girly or gay even.
2007-07-02 14:00:32 · update #2
I don't see an issue as it depends on your relationship with your friend.
Take a moment and give yourself a quick sanity test. Does he pick up on when you feel like being bothered and when you don't? Do you respect each others privacy? Are you someone who prefers living alone? Does the thought of sharing your space with anyone long term drive you crazy? Does the thought of someone touching your stuff or moving things get on your nerves? If the answer is yes – clearly you should have your own place. Are you both employed? Will he/you pay his share of the rent without being prompted, does he clean up after himself, and do you? Will being roommates allow you both the opportunity to ease the financial burden at this phase in your lives (i.e. child support, alimony etc.), what are your expectations and did you both discuss terms and conditions on this move?
Here is another thought -- How will you both handle visitation with your children? Do you expect that he will watch your kids while you go out or vice versa? How will you handle overnight guests and how long would you want them to stay? You both have habits and preferences and. if you are aware of this up front and you can live with it . . . well go for it.
Just make sure you provide a contract or lease agreement regarding payment of rent, utilities, to include -- will it be a 6 month, annual or month to month lease? Do you have to renew at the end of each contract cycle, and if for some reason things do not work out, make sure you include a clause to handle breaking the lease. The #1 way to kill a friendship is not handling your financial responsibilities (i.e. coming up short on your share of the rent). Avoid all that by including the financial terms and agreements in the contract and make sure you include signatures. Discuss these and other issues up front, come to a workable agreement and go for it.
Best of luck.
2007-07-02 14:46:22 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here's the way I look at: people that love each other, and no it doesn't make you gay if you 'love' your best male friend, can survive anything together, including being roommates. If you are truly good friends who respect and love each other, you should be able to live together. And if things don't work out, your friendship should be strong enough to hold up any storms that happened. If you doubt your devotion to him or vice versa, perhaps you should re-evalute
2007-07-02 14:10:33 · answer #2 · answered by binzy86 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would just like to throw in there that my best friend and I roomed together freshmen and sophmore year of college. We would be again but she is transfering. Everyone told us it was a bad idea, but we are so close it was like living with a sister. It actually worked out well cause we were comfortable around eachother and knew what gets on eachothers nerves and when to leave eachother alone. Do what you think is best!
2007-07-02 14:24:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I definitely think that its possible for you guys to live together and get along if you two just communicate to one another when somethings bothering you. Its good that you two deflect your aggressions away form eachother, perhaps you two care enough not to fight. If both of you take the time to see eachothers point of view, however different it may be, you'll be fine.
2007-07-02 13:57:01 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You picked the unsuitable segment you notice except me none folks on this segment have giant brains I consider they name Judas Rabbi their chief however he is best normal at great the relaxation lack sufficent sized brains. Also we P&Sers are on no account going to learn that lengthy paragraph. Be Nice on your peers Respect and peace. Hold a peace signal while you see your roomate. Look at the vivid facet Im no longer mad at you :)
2016-09-05 13:04:00 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sure doesn't seem like a good idea for you two to move in with each other. Because of your intense dissagreements it would just not be a good thing for you to do at this point.
2007-07-02 13:52:30 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would not do it if I could help it. I think you'll need him as a part of your support system and vice versa; that'll be almost impossible if you're at loggerheads.
In any case, I would not do it if I were you.
Good luck.
2007-07-02 13:52:13 · answer #7 · answered by Serenity O 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no, because once u all start to live together, u start to demand and eveything goes crazy, if u roomate with someone u didnt kno u would ease in and be like okay ima be easy on u sense i dont kno u
2007-07-02 14:08:39 · answer #8 · answered by Wayne L 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I did it with my best friend. Worked out just fine.
2007-07-02 13:57:41 · answer #9 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont get offended ok... but r u gay? or he is gay?...sorry
2007-07-02 13:52:13 · answer #10 · answered by antonette2330 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋