Homphobic family (friends)....?

Question

I have a uncle that takes care of me, and do things for me, but yet he treats me different from my other male cusins, like I'm lessor than what a "real" man supposed to be like. My granny always question me why I neer go out, and stuff with my other cusins, that I need to start being like a normal teenage boys are. I like staying to myself, and I dont like hanging out with my male cusin, because all they talk about is girls and stuff, and they can go find them like 4 girls a piece, but I cant find me no boy, because I'm closeted bisexual. I just dont feel right being sround a group of str8 guys that has no taste for gay/ bi guys, and is all about girls and stuff. I dont like it when a guy brag about him and his chick. I think girls should not be done that way. No offense str8 guys, but I think some str8 guys are all about sex and stuff, and not just seeing the beauty and stuff in a woman like I see

Answer 1

You sound like a very sensitive individual, and I appreciate your mature thoughts on how women should be treated. Unfortunately, most boys your age are very immature when it comes to sex and girls, and if they knew you were bi, they probably would persecute you for it at this time. You are right to stay away from these cousins, as they sound like bad influences, regardless of a boy's orientation.

Maybe next time your uncle makes you feel different from the other boys, try to take it as a compliment that you aren't the same as those Neanderthals, LOL. It's probably very lonely for you, but sooner or later you will find a group you fit in with and you won't feel so lonely anymore.

Another tip: Could you maybe try to steer the conversation away from girls by mentioning some interest that you all might share, like a movie or TV show for instance?

Answer 2

OK, so what's your question?
I think it may be something along the lines of how you can deal with your family and be true to yourself?

I would suggest that you see if there are any LGBT youth groups in your area, or a GSA at school. In this way you can be around some supportive people at least part of your week.
This will also give you the opportunity to go out occasionally and get those complaints removed.

You accomplish two things at the same time! :o)

"Normal" is overrated, and is different for every person.

Good luck!

Answer 3

Well sorry to tell you that it isn't just straight guys that are all about sex and stuff. I'm not sure what exactly your question is, though my advice to you is go out and find friends more like yourself. There are people out there. I don't know where you live but there maybe some groups that may be able to help like PFLAG. Our local chapter of PFLAG is very supportive and helps many people come out and deal with issues such as yours. As far as people treating you differently, that is ok, everyone is different and if people cannot deal with that is their problem. I understand that being a teen and bisexual is hard, though you can get through it alot of other people have, and as long as you know this you'll be fine.

Answer 4

True, some straight guys are morons that only look for a girl with a nice rack. If you're bi, you still have somewhat of a girl preference right? Look for a girl with a great personality, one that's fun to be around. If you're just looking for hot chicks, that's what the Internet is for.

Answer 5

yeah what is your question?
So you see inner beauty in a woman...wow.
And you think guys it's all about sex...have you been living in a basement somewhere? And with women they enjoy a mans personality...it has nothing to do with his money or his virility. All this happens on Fantasy Island.
It's always about sex. What made you think any different?
And you don't like hanging with the boys. There is always books and libraries.
I think you harbor ideals that don't exist in this plane of reality.
I used to too but I realized if I did not get my head out of the clouds that life would walk all over me.
My advice is prepare to stand up, or write WELCOME across your back.
This world has no time for the naive and day dreamers. If you don't clue in first you will end up being hurt repeatedly.
If you feel an outsider and don't like that feeling do something to change it or get comfortable in your current situation.
You call your family homophobic but they sound like the run of the mill American family.
I suspect your expecations and the facts of reality just are not meshing.
Hint: Reality is not about to change for you. You change your reality or you change your preconceived notions.
The quest for personal happiness is all on you.

Answer 6

If your uncle is giving you special treatment is must be because he assumes that is what you need. If you wish to correct the behaviour then do so, encourage more manly things that you can do together.

As for granny maybe you should tell her there's more to life nowadays than just skirt chasing, and tell her you refuse to be low brow just because other family members like your cousins are.

Answer 7

It all sounds normal to me.
I to spend a lot of time alone and sorta prefer it that way.
If you can't find any guys maybe you should ask if there are any in your area and around your age.
You never know there might be one right on your block.

Answer 8

I think you're the one with the problem, not your cousins. You are the one who distances yourself from them, not the other way around.

If you get over this bigotry of straight people, you will have better luck fitting in with others.

You shouldn't feel bad for them, after all, they were born that way. You need to accept them.