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i am currently in sexual abuse councelling. i have very severe depression. i have been so poorley with having MRSA superbug last year and cervical cancer this year. i also have a lot of other medical problems at the minute. my partner and i are very very much in love,yet when he wants to make love i just dont feel like it.need to know how to get myself back to my oldself of wanting to make love all the time with him too. its not that i dont want to make love,because i do,its just that my libido has gone from being very high,to almost non existant. my partner is so understanding,and has supported me through everything we have been through together. is there anything i can buy over the counter to increase my sex drive naturally. i am working very hard to come to terms with what happened to me in the past,but i dont want it to start affecting my future with my fantastic partner. can anyone help me with some advice please. would appreciate kind genuine answers only,thanks x

2007-07-02 07:06:15 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health Women's Health

*Jackie*. you are an insensative person who really needs to think before you go round insulting people. i asked for kind genuine help,not neandathol responses. did them 2 points mean so much to you. you must sleep well at nights eh!

2007-07-02 07:17:03 · update #1

13 answers

Please go and get some advice from your GP - it could be your hormone levels but he/she is bound to have something to help. I'm not surprised that your libido is low, given all the problems you have - I bet you thank God every day for your understanding partner. Hope EVERYTHING works out for you - you deserve it.

Jackie: The lady asked for genuine answers only. If you can't comply - DON'T BLOODY ANSWER! Only conclusion I can come to with that reply of yours is that you're a GUY. I don't think any self-respecting female would come out with sh*t like that.

2007-07-02 07:37:05 · answer #1 · answered by M'SMA 5 · 2 0

Maybe your partner could try to seduce you. Asking if you wanna isn't very romantic, is it? If he gives you a massage, or is willing to try some kissing and gentle making out, and you're not pressured to perform, you may naturally get in the mood. He should pretend you're both back in high school, and do whatever it is he did back then to get a girl to come across. Might work on you, too! Personally, I get more excited by a night off from cooking than I do by flowers, lol, but everybody's different!
Depression squashes libido, I know that. You should probably talk to your doctor. Maybe he or she can suggest an anti-depressant with a low occurance of diminishing sex drive. I have heard in some extreme cases, Viagra has been prescibed for women, but again, talk to your doctor. That's the person who can really help you. Good luck, Hon!

2007-07-02 07:20:13 · answer #2 · answered by baymast13 7 · 0 0

I was actually just about to post a question very simular to this. I too have a very low labido and a past of sexual abuse. I'm no longer depressed but I have never recovered from the lack of labido. I am also in a healthy, loving relationship but this doesn't seem to change things.

I plan on having my hormonal levels tested soon. A lot of times, a lack of labido is yet another hormonal imbalance. I'm told that this can be balanced out with hormonal therapy. I feel like this is my only chance at making my husband's and my sex life better. You might want to try it as well.

2007-07-02 07:11:01 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

Well the government stopped that, because there was a product that would do just that for you-- testosterone. The government doesn't want white people to have sex, or anyone who is middle-class or above, because they want to destroy the birthrate so they can bring in more and more dumb illegal aliens who will work for chickenfeed and no benefits, who are outside of the legal protection of the US or any other western gov't. You can illicitly get testosterone and give yourself very low doses to boost your libido-- and by very low dose, I mean 1mg, which has been proven to raise women's libido. @Jessica: That is exactly correct, and it is sold under the trade name, Androgel. And yes, testosterone controls the libido in both males and females, while the estrogens and progesterone are carcinogens that mostly do bad things, but there are some beneficial effects such as, positive HDL/LDL ratio profiles.

2016-05-21 03:08:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

i really feel for you. I had 2 years of no interest whatsover following a serious hormonal problem (low progesterone and oestrogen) as a result of a miscarriage. i have a fantastic partner and it was hard to go from being high in libido to nothing and i felt so bad for him and our relationship. it took nearly two years for my libido to come back, i think when our body goes through a lot it can take a long time to resettle. i honestly don't think you can rush this, you have to want to have hte desire to make love, and when you are fully healed from the cancer and superbug then those feelings should return. as i said i thought it was over for me cos it took 2 years! there are other ways you can be there for him if you know what I mean, meanwhile don't be hard on yourself. you've been through hell, give yourself a break and all the time it takes. your sexual abuse and depression is another issue but i really think if you had a high libido before then it's a result of all your body has been through.

2007-07-02 07:12:04 · answer #5 · answered by Sarah J 6 · 1 0

I completely understand how you're feeling. I can imagine how hard it is to get back to your old self after such an ordeal. But what I really think will help might sound or seem a little odd to some, but it's worth a shot. Try watching some soft-core pornographic videos. I personally prefer the older ones like from the '70s and '80s. They aren't as "wham bam thank you maam" as some of the current titles. Another thing you can try is to take a bath together. The closeness will help you to bring up your sexual appetite. Also, a lot of petting... have him touch you in the places that used to get you really hot. Try not to concentrate too much on having an orgasm because that's like forcing yourself into something that you're not ready for. Take things slowly and they will eventually come back to you. Also you can try getting him riled up... I know that's always worked for me... seeing that I can get my fiancee all riled up get's me worked up too. As far as over the counter meds... I can't help with that. But I wish you the VERY BEST OF LUCK!

2007-07-02 07:25:30 · answer #6 · answered by Lacey H 1 · 0 0

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2015-05-10 11:31:02 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

it may well be to do with the medication you are on - so becareful taking anything at all as this may interfer with your prescription drugs. i'll bet if you talk to your GP about it he or she may be able to help you. altneratively how about seeing what really turns you on.. play around a bit.. dress up, roll play etc.. you might find something is just up your street! ;-)
i am so pleased you are taking control.. thats step number one and the hardest. you are not a victim and you are going to have a great life and fab sex life with your man! keep thinking positive...

lots of luck
emma x

2007-07-02 07:12:53 · answer #8 · answered by emma m 4 · 1 0

You poor thing - you have been through so much! I have heard good things about the testosterone treatment - I don't know if you can get it over the counter, though. Please talk to your GP or your GYN about it.

Good luck - sending best wishes for some really hot sex your way...

2007-07-02 08:09:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

There are topical creams able to be purchased in your local "love store" and also romance novels always work for me...the tawdry ones.

2007-07-02 07:12:58 · answer #10 · answered by Ms. Satanique 3 · 0 0

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