i lost my virginity last night but why am I so freaked out?

Question

i lost my virginity last night but I'm freaked out because I didn't lose it how i wanted to...
I wanted to lose my virginity to my boyfriend but instead i lost it to a guy i met yesterday... I'm really confused right now and i don't know what to do because I'm stressing over it because i feel that I made a huge mistake I mean i jist met him. The guy didn't know that i was a virgin either so it hurted alot... and i don't know what to tell my boyfriend because he still thinks I'm a virgin and i know i have to tell him eventually. I'm also scared we used protection but I might have caught something or I might be pregnant because from what I've heard protection doesn't always work. I want to get on birth control but i could never tell my father how i lost my virginity and to who... what should i do about my boyfriend, how can i get over what I've done, and how can i get birth control without my father knowing?

Answer 1

i'm sorry to hear about this. you know, i ended up losing my virginity to someone i didn't plan to, in a way i didn't plan to, and i was equally freaked out the next day. stuff happens... try not to be entirely too hard on yourself, okay?

as far as concern over pregnancy, diseases, and birth control look for the planned parenthood facility in your area. they will NOT tell your parents, unless your state has some law that they have to. its too soon to test for pregnancy or diseases, but honestly, chances are you are okay. now, thats not always the case. i know a girl who used a condom and got HPV her first time. just take a few deep breaths, forgive yourself and go to planned parenthood.

as far as telling your boyfriend, i'm sorry i don't have any answers for you in that regards.... you'll have to look within for the right way to tell him, but you are right that you need to let him know.

hey, feel free to email me if you need any more advice or just need someone to vent to, k? i'm here to listen.. and i'll be online all day because i'm at work until ten thirty this evening, and its only 10:50 am.

Answer 2

First of all, Don't tell your boyfriend unless you want him to dump you! secondly, don't worry about telling your dad, you can get birth control without him knowing, there is some good advice from some people here about that... thirdly and most importantly, Don't worry about how you lost your virginity... there is too much emphasis on the whole virginity thing. what happened to you is very normal, and it was probably intensely hot erotic and memorable!! Sex and love do not have to go together. Just because you have a sexual experience with someone does not mean that you should be stuck together for the rest of your lives.
Your boyfriend will not know any difference when you actually do make love, many women no longer have a hymen due to masturbation, before they ever actually have sexual intercourse, so don't worry about that. You do not have to experience pain the first time you make love, and you do not have to experience lots of blood either. Just relax, take a deep breath and feel happy cos you are in control of your own life, no one else. Now you can make love with your boyfriend without it having to live up to some fantasy about losing your virginity.
Embrace your life and enjoy every minute of it, without regrets, and be thankful that you are in control and that your virginity wasn't just taken from you without your consent as it is for so many young women on this planet!

Answer 3

Relax. No one ever loses their virginity how they want to. God knows I didn't lose it how I wanted either but it was an experience that I will never forget.

If you used protection you are 99% safe that you are not pregnant and 99% safe you didnt catch anything.

As far as your boyfriend goes... obviously you haven't had sex with him yet so he doesn't know what you feel like. Now you have an idea what sex feels like and you can be prepared for it.

Dont worry everything is going to be ok.

There should be a planned parent hood or other organization in your area that will supply condoms and other contraceptives to younger folks. Check in your phone book or online.

Answer 4

There's no way to change the past. You made a decision, and although you regret it now, its over. You'll never get your virginity back to do over again. You don't have to tell your father that you've already lost your virginity. You can tell him you just think it may be time to get on the pill incase you and your b/f were to take it to the next level. Or you can always go to a place like planned parenthood (thats what its called here where i live, you can get on the pill being underage, at a low cost, and without your paren'ts conscent.) You are going to have to tell your boyfriend. There's no way around that. Explain to him that it was a mistake and you sincerely regret doing it, but you just want to be honest with him. Its a messy situation now, but its not going to go away, so you will just have to do the best you can with it.

Answer 5

whatever happened, happened now. You cannot change it. Find out within yourself why do you really have sex with a guy you didn't know, but made your boyfriend wait. When you figure that out, you're probably may understand that the current boyfriend isn't who you really want. I don't know about the birth control situation because I am a man. But I think you can get the morning after pill over-the-counter.

Answer 6

You need to calm down and don't regret anything because you will always blame yourself every time you think about this. It's not completely all of you fault; you laid down with him and he went in so it's both on you. Sit down or call you bf and let him know the deal; that's part of a stronger relationship to be honest with each other. If he accepts your apology and gets over it don't do it again. If he doesn't you just lost a good thing and made the biggest mistake of your life. Tell you father or mother and be honest don't hide anything from your parents because it maybe the biggest mistake you ever did. Tell them you want to be on birth controls because you had sex and you don't want to be pregnant because you had unprotected sex once.

Answer 7

okay lots of questions, you should have taken more time to get to know the guy but my cousin went through the same thing except she didnt have a boyfriend at the time, so you should tell your dad but if you dont want to go to your local health clinic and get birth control it shouldnt be very expensive and they wont tell your parents unless you want them to and about your boyfriend there isnt much you can do without breaking up with him or him breaking up with you except lying to him and that never works i should know but im sure you arent pregnant if you used protection and next time you could be persuaded into doing drugs or drinking so i would remove yourself from those situations and if your friends or boyfriend judges you they are not worth it, hope this helps because i know i would be freaked out too but good luck!

Answer 8

I hate how everyone is lecturing you. They don't know you, and they're judging you you on this one incident. But anyways.

Alright, so what you did is in the past now. Go to an STD clinic and make sure that you didn't get one. Plus, you can go on birth control without your parents knowing. Make a doctor's appointment and talk with your doctor about it, and they'll sort everything out for you.

You should tell your boyfriend - he might break up with you, but it's better to be honest instead of deciving. Just tell yourself that you made a mistake, but by owning up to it, you should be able to move on.

Answer 9

you should be honest with your boyfriend and tell him the truth. The longer you wait the worst you are going to feel. The only truth way to get over what you've done is to accepted what you've done and hope that your boyfriend forgives you. You can go to your local clinic and ask for the shot. The shot last for three months. The only thing about getting the shot is weight gain and spotting.

Answer 10

You feel bad because it is just guilt fromit not being your bf and feeling cheap from a guy you just met. Slow it down... Tell your father hey look when I start having sex I want to be safe about it by not only condoms but by birth conrtol also. I know you may feel uncomfortable but I feel safe coming and talking to you about it and I also want to know if you could talk to me about safe measures for sex so I will be well informed ahead time....that will make him feel as if hey shes being smart by coming to me and she feels safe coming to me.... As for your boyfriend break up with him so you dont have to tell him anything. b/c if you tell him your not a virgin and you cheated on him he may become vindictive and tell your dad about the whole thing so play it safe and let him go and then you dont have to explain a thing... And if you used a condom you're not pregnant and when you ask your dad about birth control ask him about semi-annual check-ups also.. Its not going to be comfortable but it will get everything to work in your favor. again slow it down with the sex buddy dont sleep with a guy b/c he looks good or treats you nice give yourself some time to grow up a little bit more