My first wife enjoyed oral sex and was passionate about sex, but we didn't get along outside the bedroom. I get along great with my current wife and we are like best friends, but I don't feel like she is my lover. She doesn't get into sex at all. It is impossible to please her. During sex she looks disinterested no matter what I try (and I have tried many things).
2007-06-30 04:24:29 · 24 answers · asked by Willy 444444 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
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2007-06-30 04:26:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you really expect the perfect woman? C'mon - great sex in the first marriage didn't get you real far, did it?
I would suggest that you omit the details about marriage #1 and talk with your current wife about it just the way you have here. Ask her if she feels shy with you, if she is interested, and what it is that she really likes in the bedroom. Instead of comparing her to your first wife, try to please her. Not the way you think you should, but the way SHE wants. Maybe you bring your first wife in the bedroom without even realizing it. Women can sense these things - this would be a major turn-off to your wife. I sure hope you haven't brought up any of those sort of details about your first marriage. That would be enough to make any woman not want to sleep with you - ever. Maybe you are expecting too much from your current wife. Maybe she does get into sex, but just isn't as uninhibited as wife #1.
Sorry, but the way you wrote your question makes it pretty clear that you compare the 2 which really isn't fair.
2007-06-30 04:51:30 · answer #2 · answered by Mrs. Goddess 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
All I can tell you is that you have to find her spot. Look for that spot that drives her wild. It could be behind her neck, or her ears. Many have it in her breas area. Talking to my other male and female friends I have learned that kissing the feet and working your way up is one of the many favorite spots for both the woman to get and the man to give.
You can also try a romantic getaway where no one knows you and you can tell her that she has the freedom to go as wild as she wants or you can plan a nice dinner with candles and work your way from there. You say she is your best friend so you and her have great communication. Talk to her and find out what she likes and what she doesn't like. Good Luck!
2007-06-30 04:45:30 · answer #3 · answered by csprincess2000 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I know just from talking with my women friends that some like sex more than others. My husband and I were even talking about it last night, trying to guess how many of our friends are living in what's called sexless marriages. We know of one couple that we're good friends with, that rarely have sex. The wife does it to basically keep her husband around--and then only when she has to. She thinks it's dirty and disgusting.
I honestly don't know what to do about that, if I were in your shoes. I know neither me nor my husband would last long in a marriage that sex wasn't a part of, it's a major part of our relationship. However, I also know that I have a hormonal imbalance--I have a little too much testosterone in my system and not enough estrogen--and my doctor has told me that women who have this generally enjoy sex a little more than most. ;-) But, I guess it could also work the reverse way as well.
You might want to talk to her about it, outside of the bedroom. Tell her how much you love her, but that you want this to be a bigger part of your life with her, and you want to make her happy. Maybe, if it goes well, suggest she talk with her doctor about it. Best of luck to you both!
2007-06-30 04:36:33 · answer #4 · answered by basketcase88 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes some people enjoy sex more than others and the reasons vary. Sometimes its just a lack of confidence and not being able to let themselves go and enjoy it. Cant say I have that problem now but when I was younger I just couldnt enjoy it found the whole thing scary.
2007-06-30 04:32:15 · answer #5 · answered by Magster 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know, being a woman myself that it varies between women how large of a sex drive they have,,,,, some women are sex maniacs and others may never really want it at all. But if you continue to try,maybe with some toys or something that always brings excitment, you dont want to lose your great bond as partners because of miscommunication in bed. you should try to talk to her about it, tell her you have noticed that she doesnt seem to get into it in the bed,,,and you want to know what you can do to pleasure her, what does she enjoy? what does she wan tto try? i always find that when my man seems determined to find out what works for me and how i like to get off, it turns me on even more knowing that he cares so much about me reaching an orgasm! try it!! dont be afraid to speak to her, communication is the key in any circumstance,,,Good luck!
2007-06-30 04:48:20 · answer #6 · answered by Life....it blows! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What an odd question. Of course some women enjoy sex more than others...why would anyone think all women would like it exactly the same? All men don't like it exactly the same.
Your own experience with your two wives has shown you that not all women enjoy it alike...
2007-06-30 04:28:30 · answer #7 · answered by . 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First off if I were you I would turn off the lights while having sex. You have answered your own question, by telling us about both your wives here. I can't imagine though, why you would believe that all women would enjoy sex equally.
2007-06-30 04:29:04 · answer #8 · answered by Anthony F 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you guys are truly best friends, then you should be able to talk to her about almost anything. Ask her whats makes her satisfied in bed. Talk to her about ways to please her, then you can tell her things that please you.
I think everyone enjoys sex in thier own way. Some are very vocal if you do not please them right while others just go along with the flow.
Communication is the key to every relationship! Without communication, you have nothing!!
2007-06-30 04:31:23 · answer #9 · answered by april s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you've answered your own question. :)
Seriously though, I feel for you. I have an on again off again boyfriend who is absolutely terrific in the sack. We fight about everything when we are not having the most incredible sex on the planet. When we are on the skids, I go out with what seem to be nice guys.......they do nothing for me. I go home from a date and think about having sex with my crappy boyfriend. Just thinking about him turns me on. A horrible dilemma. Good luck to you.
2007-06-30 04:31:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
true some people enjoy sex more than other but its not a myth. you just need to hit that spot for your current wife ask her how you can pleasure her.
2007-06-30 04:33:48 · answer #11 · answered by Vanessa W 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋