Well, I am 18 years old, and my boyfriend is 20, and we have been together for a year and a half already, and knowing each other for 3 years. I love him soooo much, and i know he loves me back, but he can be the biggest asshole sometimes, but he can also be the sweetest guy in the world. There is not a month that passes by that he has not made me cry. This all started, probably when I gave it up to him. He is a very controling guy, and very jealous, But let me not seem all innocent, I am even more jealous than he is. Every time we try breaking up, we both cry, because he knows he is hurting me, and i love him so much i cant see myself without him. Guys, Is it something that i do that makes him an asshole? From a guys point of view, Why would you be an asshole to me, a sweet, cute, down to earth girl? Please dont tell me to dump him, or that i am too young and i will get over him ( I may only be 18, but i am a very responsible girl). I really want us to work!
2007-06-30 00:19:50 · 8 answers · asked by .. 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You need to go deeper within and ask your intelligence the reason for this problem.The solution is not outside but its with the problem.Now you tell me what is this jealousy ?why does this happen , is your relationship purely on physical basis and you do not want quality happiness in life? Ask yourself honestly this question.For god's sake writing slang is not fashionable it shows your attitude towards the person you seem to think you love , now pray to god asking him to give you the power to change the things you want and patience to understand those things which you can't change and wisdom to know the difference.May god bless you with peace of mind
2007-06-30 00:35:33 · answer #1 · answered by s9consulting 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first things first, don't mistake "a very controling guy, and very jealous" guy for being love. Too often people mistake that as being about caring. It's not. If you are that way too, then essentially what you both feel for each other is obsession, not love.
Sounds like you both have low self-esteem and anger issues, both of which can make a "normal" relationship damn near impossible. The root of issues like that is often some sort of abuse (sexual or otherwise) or neglect as a young child, and unfortunately those issues don't usually fix themselves.
If you don't want to hear the obvious ("to dump him, or that i am too young and i will get over him") then find a good couples therapist and see them weekly.
At some point you may have to make a choice between a life of misery, and a life of short term misery and long term happiness, and since you've got your whole life ahead of you, don't settle.
2007-06-30 00:40:55 · answer #2 · answered by whiskeyman510 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hi,
Seems like you two have a history and a bond.
But it at also seems that you are doing things to each other that cause repeated hurt and pain.
You need some help outside of yourselves to sort this one out.
Try seeing a relationships counselor and learn about yourselves and each other. This help is available for all people not just married couples.
Try and see...
regards
Peter
2007-06-30 00:44:15 · answer #3 · answered by Peter H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
welcome to life. people can be like that. in this whole description i noticed something interesting. no concept as to ...why. as nice as you see yourself all people are like diamonds, you see a different facet every time you turn and you, as most people, apparently dont see when you can be difficult. perhaps you have heard it takes two to tango. find out what you do that might contribute to this and work on changing TOGETHER. this is no ones fault singularly but you need to work on action as a couple if you want to stay as one. never assume its one persons fault. as John kennedy said, ask what you can do not what can be done for you....good luck.
2007-06-30 00:35:01 · answer #4 · answered by koalatcomics 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey.....i m going thru same situation.n my bf makes me cry almost everyday.well i think coz v r innocent n sweet they think they hv al rights on us n they try to dominate us.they want everthng according to them n even us.simply i think they hv taken us 4 granted.
so many times v too tried to brk up bt v jst cant.best of luck 4 ur love life.....
2007-06-30 00:28:11 · answer #5 · answered by Sharmishtha s 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, in your question you called yourself sweet, cute, responsible, etc.. Could it be that you are not giving enough in the relationship, and that you are only focusing on yourself?
2007-06-30 00:24:39 · answer #6 · answered by mel s 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your jealousy is driving him away. Be less needy and give him some space, and be less controlling. Then he won't pull away and fight with you so much.
Good luck.
2007-06-30 00:26:33 · answer #7 · answered by A Military Veteran 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
.maybe you should two should take a break, and make him realize how important you are to him.
and if you two are really ment to be, he'll change his ways and your relationship will probably be stronger.
2007-06-30 00:28:37 · answer #8 · answered by jojo 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋