What do you think of this poem I wrote?

Question

It's my first positive one because its the first positive mood I've had in a long time. I write to express my moods and make sense of them.

Peace

Is there such a thing?
Life is full of pain.
This we all know.
We live it.
Peace exists, it really does.
You just have to start looking.

Do you feel it or see it?
Yes if you are really looking.
The gust of wind brushing your face,
Do you feel it?
The sun going down as night comes,
Can you see it?

If not, then there is always tomorrow.
You will have your chance.
Peace surrounds us,
Only if you embrace it.
Enjoy it, breathe it in and hold on tight.
It might just embrace you too.

I am happy to read any positive criticism. But ever hear the saying if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all?

Maybe for some of you who don't get it. You have to live in a world of darkness for a long period of time where you see nothing but death. You are trying to find a way out and finally I see a light at the end of the tunnel. There is some hope. And if just one person sees something good in what you wrote, then its successful.

I do believe in myself.

Answer 1

Oh, wow... I Love the ending! I liek how this poem progresses, sort of bleak to more optimistic. This did make me feel better, glad you shared it. :)

Keep writing!

Answer 2

Yes, your poem is great. Perhaps this reply will make you think. Sometimes I sit and wonder why are the birds so free? They go singing merrily as they fly along... Sometimes I sit and wonder why are the insects so independent?... They never need any help working busily as they help themselves... Sometimes I sit and wonder why are the butterflies so beautiful? Their wings are colored by nature fluttering beautifully through the air... Sometimes I sit and wonder why are the deer so graceful? They never fall or stumble running gracefully through the woods... Sometime I wonder why are people so complicated? Always confused and never sure wondering slowly around in a fog... Look at the beauty in yourself, you'll see clearly most of the time instead of some.:-)

Answer 3

It's ok but I am having a little trouble feeling it. Maybe it is just the mood I am in. I hope to feel peace soon because ....... Well I had something here but I was interrupted so know it is gone lost in the unknown place in my mind. it will surface again but when is the question. I agree, with one of the other answers on this question keep writing you never know what will happen

Answer 4

I love it! You get a gold star. I especially love these lines:
Do you feel it or see it?
Yes if you are really looking.
The gust of wind brushing your face,
Do you feel it?
The sun going down as night comes,
Can you see it?

Answer 5

WOW, sweetie, that was BEAUTIFUL, thank-you.......I am very serious what I said. You really touched me with that, and I thank you again.I know we joke so much around here,but sometimes something very special pops up, and this is one of those times.Thankyou, and in Hawaiian Mahalo............Aloha.

Answer 6

it was a great poem i love it,it has a point.I write poems too,but i can not write unless i feel something,it is to express my self,any time i feel something i write it in a poem.Contiune write.

Answer 7

It's a nice peace of work.

Answer 8

keep writing it is not a poem that I would go for but you should write for yourself first and others second. remember to believe in yourself

Answer 9

very nice simple and soft and true ! check out mine and give me some feed back too! heres a link to my page

http://www.postpoems.com/members/poetrystouch/

Answer 10

If you really want me to read this, I will have to get my knife and cut myself again...