Would you be mad if someone told you this about your husband?

Question

I'm at the pharmacy and this woman comes up to me and says, "I dont know how to tell you this, but if it were me I would want to know....I saw your husband at the bar the other night and he was bumping and grinding with this woman on the dance floor. She said, in her opinion, he should only be dancing like that with his wife. To me, it must have looked very bad for someone to feel so compelled to tell me that. I just think thats wrong. If you are married and cant "reasonably" dance with someone else, then you shouldnt be dancing at all. Am I wrong? I dont dance like that with other men. The only one i want rubbing all up on my body like that is my husband; and he obviously dont' share that point of view.

I"m mad at him for doing it, not this woman for telling me, duh, i though that was obvious, obviously not, sorry!

Answer 1

You need to realize that woman my have been taking her story way out of proportion What she feels is not ok you might feel IS ok. Now if she told you she saw your husband f-ing some woman in the parking lot you have reason to be upset

Answer 2

I definitely would not like it, and would be very upset. And I know my husband would be furious if I did that. But, there is really nothing you can do except tell him how you feel about it. If I were you I would tell him it really hurt your feelings and was very disrespectful to you. I would also discuss further outings to bars, maybe he should not go out to bars with out you. Make it a together thing. I can see once in a while a guy going out with his buddies.... but if this is what he will routinely do when he goes out with his buddies I would put a stop to that then as well. Its just asking for trouble. Try to get your husband to understand how it made you feel to hear that from a stranger, and ask him how he would feel if the situation was the other way around. Give him another chance to behave appropriately, then if you hear of something like that happening again put a stop to him going out to bars with out you. I am sure he would not appreciate you bumping and grinding with some other guy. Good luck!
Hope this helps.

Answer 3

I agree I wouldn't want my husband doing that and would be extremely mad if he did. But she could have just made it up also. Women are good at that especially if she got shot down by him at the bar.. But alcohol plays a big part in what you might do when at a bar and wrapped up in things (friends Music Drinking, showing off) I would ask him about it. Don't accuse him of it just ask in a nice way or say so I heard about the bar the other night did you have fun? What all happened? Just see what he has to say. I live in a small town and this kind of thing happens all the time at the bar a woman gets mad over something and starts running her mouth to try and get him in trouble.. Hope all works out and she is just lying..

Answer 4

There are lots of questions here. Do you know her? How does she know that was you husband? Where were you when he was dancing at a bar? Do you know if this woman and you share the same definition of "bumping and grinding"?

Without making any accusation, bring this up. Just tell your husband that about what she said as if you're wondering why she would have said such a thing. If you know your husband, you'll know from his response whether you should be worried.

Answer 5

First I must say I am amazed that you are mad about *how* he was dancing with another woman. Not the fact that he was at the bar alone in the first place, or even the fact that he was dancing with another woman, but only about *how* he was dancing with the other woman. I am not normally one to agree with being upset about something like this. I would normally say you need to trust him, etc. But seeing as how the trust was there enough to be ok with him being at a bar alone and with dancing with another woman, and it is only the way he was doing it that is upsetting you, I would say yes, you should be upset. Tell him you are not happy about it. Let him know that he is very lucky to have a wife that does not get upset about him being at a bar alone or even with dancing with another woman, but if someone else saw it and felt it necessary to tell her about *how* he was dancing, he needs to back off a little. You have given him plenty of ley way, he needs to think about that and respect that. Kudo's and K+ to you.

Answer 6

Mad at who?
-The woman: no...but she should mind her own business. To know why, read on...

-The husband: maybe. Do you have set boundaries on that type of thing? I mean, if he didn't kiss her, maybe he thought what he was doing was OK. I have friends that would do that with another woman if their wife was there, and they also would do it when she's not. Then again, I know that MY wife would probably be upset...I think...we've never talked about it. I know that kissing would be off limits.

Seems like you're mad. So you need to talk with him about what's allowed. Not sure I'd tell him that someone came up to you, though. Don't want him thinking you're snooping on him--cuz that will turn this thing into a BIG argument.

Answer 7

Has your husband had anything to say about this? Have you asked him yet? Without other evidence, be careful flying off the handle on the word of someone you don't know from Eve. She could be trying to drive a wedge between you and your husband.

Still, take the info and store it away. Talk to your husband about it. See if you can get confirmation from other people at the bar. Then if he's out creeping around, you can bust him.

Answer 8

Whoa. Why don't you calmy tell your husband this and give him a chance to defend himself? Was he even there? Do you know this woman? Could it potentially be someone just trying to get your goat? And why's your hubby out dancing without you anyway? All fair enough questions to ask.....get his side before you let this get to you. In all fairness, if it turns out true, than no, your hubby should be doing no kind of dancing with any other female except you and his family. Best wishes.

Answer 9

Yea..
I don't think that I would be thrilled about it. I would talk to him about it, and find out what's up, but I would try not to lose my cool over it, because the reality of it is, you didn't know the woman, and since you weren't there you don't have any way of knowing if she were telling you the truth or not...hell can you even be sure that the man she is talking about is your husband?
I know it probably doesn't make sense for her to lie, but there are people in the world who live to bring chaos into our lives.
You know your husband...ask yourself if he is the type of man that would do something like that?
Talk to him, and find out what happened.

Answer 10

Before you freak out, consider who this woman is. Does she know you? Him? Could she have any interest in making you feel angry? You should take things slowly and evaluate the information they gave you.

If she is a trustworthy person, then you might have to open your eyes....If you trust your husband, tell him about this. You know him, and you'll know if he did this or not. And always have a Plan B ready, in case things get ugly. Good luck....

Answer 11

Personal experience tells me that your husband should only be dancing, bumping and gridning with you.
Does he feel it is okay to go out without you? YOu need to talk to him.