about his sexual past, and the things I found out are the things I didn't want to beleive. In the past he has had a foursome, a threesome, been with many woman and dont some wild and crazy things. Now that he is with me he says I am the best ever and that Iam better than a 1000 women, however in my head i think he is comparing me to them, I mean how can I beat out 3 women giving him a bj at the same time? I feel less now to him, like i dont compare and its affecting me cause I dont think I measure up. He even said that with the foursome it wasnt that great and it was akward (which I dont beleive f course) but I still feel insecure about it. My past is pretty tame, i have only been with two guys. Iam 26 and he is 38. He is the best thing to happen to mein the romance department and he is the nicest guy ever. He says he wants to be with me and doesnt ever want me to share him with anyone else, ever. He says he wants to spend his life with me and only me.
2007-06-28 20:41:09 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Everyday he tells me m beatiful and that he thinks i am the best. He just says all the right things. The sex is awesome too, and he swears that he has never had sex like this with anyone ever....but still, how can get over feeling insecure about his sexual past.
2007-06-28 20:42:26 · update #1
Your boyfriend is significantly older than you, so you can expect that he will have had more sexual experiences than you. Rest assured, your bf is NOT comparing you to other women that he's been with, or to the "wild" sexual experiences that he's had with others. You are unique and he loves you and wants to be with you for the things that make you you. If it was all about sex your bf could have chosen to stay single and continue to have the same types of experiences he did in the past. Instead he is with you and, God willing, focusing all of his sexual energy on you and on making you happy. He experienced all of this before he met you and then rejected it for you. That should tell you what (and who) he truly values.
2007-07-01 23:51:01 · answer #1 · answered by Dick Jones 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be sad over what had happened b4 u n ur bf meet each other. U will only feel misery n u can't go further in ur current relationship. Even with any other guy. U cant change anyone's past.
If u think he is the best guy ever, y don't u enjoy ur time together n be happy ? Being together is NOT only about sex.
U can be cautious but don't make urself feel insecure n miserable all the time.
2007-06-28 21:08:22 · answer #2 · answered by EnAjOe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry about it too much. My husband has been with quite a few other women in his day too. He is 5 years older than me, and he is my first and only. For a while I thought the same way you do. I always thought that I was being compared to people but I learned that I wasn't. My husband tells me too that I am his best, I now truly believe that, because he feels comfortable with me. Most one night stands, threesomes, foursomes, and moresomes lol are very uncomfortable for people and with me he can relax and enjoy himself, try new things that he always wanted to try but was never able to with those other women, he can talk to me about what he likes and don't like.
So just don't worry about it, I'm sure he really does mean it when he says those things to you.
2007-06-28 20:51:29 · answer #3 · answered by Mom22 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ive got two points of view on this and I’m not trying to be offensive so please don’t take this personal.
The first point of view is that He obviously is comfortable enough around you to tell you the truth about his sexual activities (pre you) and I would reward him for his honesty.
Show him that you value his integrity above all things and that even though the truth has shocked and unsettled you, you admire his courage in telling you the truth and have identified the respect he must have in you to do so.
The second point of view is that you have asked some one who is close to you a question that may and has indirectly effected your ability to be close to him.
Honest answers that effect our picture of those we love often come from poorly thought out or deliberately probing questions meant for nothing else than self-gratitude.
Before i met my wife I was defiantly no saint either but my wife got to know and fell in love with the person i became when i was around her and i feel she never cared about what i was before that point.
I’m sure she has done some crazy stuff before me too however i don’t care because i fell in love with woman she was when she was with me.
2007-06-28 21:07:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to say it, but this sounds like it's mostly you that is creating this problem.
I understand completely that dealing with a partner's past can be tough. But in the end you have to ask if you trust him, and if you are happy with him. If you say yes, then it's up to you to let go of his past. As for comparing to 3 women, don't worry about it. 3 women is just more, not better.
2007-06-28 20:46:39 · answer #5 · answered by rohak1212 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont worry about the past.. it is past, what matters is present. Believe what he says, or u will plant a seed that will make you lose the trust u have for him... and then its pretty much over right there. Good luck.. give him the benefit of the doubt.. sounds like he deserves it.
2007-06-28 20:45:39 · answer #6 · answered by aussienurse 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What were you expecting? Do you think he just popped up out of nowhere right before you met him? Hell child, there is 12 years difference between you of course he is going to have a sexual past. If you can't deal with that then I suggest you find someone who is still a virgin.
2007-06-28 21:46:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well some experiment in the past and are not for settling down. the fun is over and now looking for a future. Believe him when he tells you that is good this way now. dont let the past ruin what you have.
2007-06-28 21:24:08 · answer #8 · answered by curious6710 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You must realize that you are with him now. His past is his past, and it is up to you to either hold him accountable for it, or to let it go. If you feel that he is truly committed in a relationship with you, then let his past go. And for him to share such things with you like he did, I would guess that he is pretty committed. If you trust him, then trust what he says about you being the best he's ever had. Feel proud about that.
2007-06-28 20:46:45 · answer #9 · answered by The Professor 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like he's settled down at 38
I would not put alot of thought into his past because it will just wear you down and out of your relationship.
stop and think about your relationship right now and if you think it will last?
Do you love him and he you and would it be fun getting ole together thats it!
forget about his past and your past and dont bring it up again
you will ruin what you have!
the past is gone! live today! await tomorrow!
you can control your feelings and emotions please dont let the past kill your love!
2007-06-28 20:52:15 · answer #10 · answered by kiphyn b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋