I have been divorced 3 times. I seem to have trust issues. only one spouse ever cheted on me.the 2nd went to a rich man.the third was too self centered.and too controlling.. I cant seem to trust s well as I should .am involved with a wonderful woman now. we enjoy each others company.we are both left handed. we are both libras.shes just right for me but I have doubts about all relationships. she hasnt done one thing wrong but I cant seem to commit to her.she deserves a chance but I seem to be holding back and I dont know why..any suggestions?
2007-06-28 11:25:15 · 13 answers · asked by road runner 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Who says you have to "move on"? Since when is there a time limit on where you are in the relationship right now? Enjoy what you have. Don't stress out on such expectations. I would say just stay where you are until you are both comfortable to move ahead - if your not comfortable, then trust your instincts and do what your gut says. If she loves you then she too will wait. If she had an agenda and a time table, then you two are not as well matched as you thougth you were. If she accepts, then you two are a perfect couple. Figure out what is important and work on that. But, always be upfront with her on this information.
All the best!
Teacher S.
2007-06-28 11:31:34 · answer #1 · answered by Teacher S. 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your looking for something in her so you won't have to commit. You've already been divorced 3 times and you seem to blame the 3 ex's for whatever went wrong in the relationship. Before fully committing to this woman I would work on myself and wonder why you feel it was their fault. It takes 2 to make a marriage and 2 to break it. Going by lefthanded or signs are wrong. You should be going by what you both feel and that your both ready to make this relationship work.
2007-06-28 18:31:29 · answer #2 · answered by Krinta 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Dont rush it and give yourself a break. You have been threw alot. How about getting some outside help for dealing with the issues of these divorces. Divorces can leave a lot of excess baggage and a professional coming into your life for a minute can help sort and explore these things. It is good to add counceling when you are healing to move on. Good luck.
2007-06-28 18:30:07 · answer #3 · answered by beachgirl90 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its the old saying - "Once bitten twice shy." What I don't understand is why you need to rush. Just enjoy the relationship and see where it goes. I also always used the approach that you don't date girls you just marry them. Well - after (more failures than you) I have figured out that you really can be with a girl and enjoy the relationship and not get married. I would be much happier and richer if I had learned that at an earlier age.
2007-06-28 18:30:22 · answer #4 · answered by Moondog 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
1. You are too immature for a real relationship, since you cannot realize that each woman is different.
2. Astrological signs have nothing to do with a relationship or how compaitble you are or anything other than something to take up space in a newspaper.
Dump this woman and get counseling until you grow up enough to try to make a relationship work.
2007-06-28 18:28:50 · answer #5 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I can tell you why you are having trouble 'committing' to this woman ... you are a LIBRA who has been 'burned' three times before! The thing that tells me that you need to 'get off your stew pot' and make a commitment is the FACT that you are BOTH left-handed Libras ... you'll 'fit' together PERFECTLY, even when 'eating' because you are 'both a bit odd' ... and I'm betting that EVERYTHING ELSE will be 'just as good or BETTER than ever before. ASK HER TO MARRY YOU ... and get married on LABOR DAY because you need to be reminded that you BOTH need to WORK to make a good marriage.
2007-06-28 18:33:28 · answer #6 · answered by Kris L 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Commit. I did the same thing, a traumatic experience led me to never give the other half of my heart to my husband for fear that he would leave me as soon as I made myself vulnerable. When I realized I was doing this and why I was doing it, I made a conscious decision to change and our marriage has been rock solid. I trust him now more than anyone.
2007-06-28 18:31:22 · answer #7 · answered by lovemandycandy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Counselling darling Get counselling. Crack your head open and find out what is really bugging you and keeping you from a great relationship. It's hard work, but you'll be glad you did.
Or you will keep repeating the same mistakes and never get to where you want to be.
Good luck
2007-06-28 18:29:00 · answer #8 · answered by teritaur 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you shouldnt go into marriage unless your 100% sure....thats really the purpose of dating, to see if your capable of living with that person for the rest of your life.
and i agree with you, its hard to trust anyone in relationships nowadays, too easy for them to divorce you and take half your stuff....
2007-06-28 18:28:58 · answer #9 · answered by a deadly rope 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I'd been through that many divorces, I'd start looking at myself, and what I was doing wrong.
2007-06-28 18:28:52 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋