I had a live in girlfriend for almost 3 years. March 2006 she took a government job and had to move 800 miles away. I helped set her up in the new place, and we visited each other at least once a month. Sep 2006 she announces she thinks we need to take a break, split up, as she wants to try "life on her own". Turns out she just wanted to get with another guy there and I found out she slept with him within two weeks of our split. Ouch. Anyways, now she is no longer with that guy and realizes her mistake (she did admit what she did) and would like another try with me. She now realizes that I am all she has been looking for in a man. I was very much in love, but think I was burned too bad by what she did. Thoughts?
2007-06-28 10:55:31 · 15 answers · asked by Michael H 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well, in her defense, a long distance relationship is the pits. Even if you are madly in love with that person, it's pretty tough to avoid feeling lonely and needy, and when someone else is right there in front of you, it can be very tempting.
If you want this relationship to have any chance, you need to close the distance between you. It wont work a second time if it didn't work the first. She clearly knows you're what she wants. She has tried someone else, and this has only reinforced her feelings for you. Just get rid of the distance thing is this is going to work.
2007-06-28 11:01:03 · answer #1 · answered by helly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should never go back to what you left the first time. Did she realize this after the other guy dumped her? Try doing yourself a favor and leave the past in the past. A real woman would have realized this before she moved and not after she moved on with someone else. You don't want to be in the same place as you were before. Good Luck.
2007-06-28 11:20:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
A lot of people are probably going to say, "She's only coming back because she lost the other guy" and normally, I'd probably say that too but, this exact thing happened to me. I did what she did to you - sort of anyway. A guy from the United Kingdom flew over here and I dated him for a month! I was still with him when I realized I had made a mistake by dumping my ex and he actually gave me a second chance and now we're getting married. Sometimes things like this happen and I think it happens for a reason.
If you love her - really, really love her - then give her another chance. She didn't cheat on you did she?
This is really a tough question to answer. Do what your heart [and head] tell you.
2007-06-28 11:02:42 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
depends on her level of remorse, and if she truly realizes that what she did hurt u terribly. sometimes one has to leave something to realize what they lost. give it some time, don't just take her back that easy, make her regain your trust, if she is sincere she will bend over backwards to get u back. but as they say once a cheater always a cheater, just depends on if your a forgiving guy or not. it is hard to get past betrayal and usually never works out but is worth a try if u still love her.
2007-06-28 11:19:36 · answer #4 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
mike
that sucks, I have been married for 18 years now and while not everything has been all Rosie and great, the one thing I can say is she has always had my back and I can trust her with everything, and for me I need to be able to trust the person I am with. so i don't know that I could take a women back that cheated on me, I would always wonder, so I think before you make a decision you need to think about weather you could really ever trust her again? what happens when she want to try life on her own again? also you have to know she was seeing this guy before the breakup, this is what gave her the courage to want to try life on her own, she didn't want to try life on he own, she just wanted to try another guy on her own.
2007-06-28 11:05:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you accept her back then you also accept the way she treated you. Tell her that you don't think it makes sense to pick up where you left off because she obviously took quite a few steps back. Tell her you are up for dating, but not being exclusive with her since you don't think she is ready for that.
It sounds great, but you are telling her that you are will to have sex with her or whoever you want to. If she wants you she will have to wait until you are ready.
2007-06-28 11:28:02 · answer #6 · answered by snack_daddy10 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO way....she will do it again...been there did that for 4 years with a girl...off and on and off and on....she never learned, I ended up just moving away to get away from the situation entirely. Loved the girl, hated who she became.
2007-06-28 11:00:29 · answer #7 · answered by Lorax099 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
One of the things I respect the most about men is their self respect in situations like this...
Because of the mileage between you now and what she did, I think you are better off moving on with your life.
2007-06-28 11:01:25 · answer #8 · answered by The It Girl ∆☻乐 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You should explore why she cheated on you in the first place. Then it is up to you. If you feel you can truly forgive her then you could give it a try.
2007-06-28 11:12:33 · answer #9 · answered by Don 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once a cheater always a cheater. Move on. never speak with her again. Go find you a new gal. Good Luck
2007-06-28 11:01:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋