This man and woman are married but there is no sexual contact at all. Says he loves her but never pleases her at all in any kind of a sexual way.The woman gets very depressed at times because she thinks that the problem is her.
2007-06-28 05:48:58 · 38 answers · asked by Missy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Missy,
There could be many factors that come into play with this one. How long have they been married? How old is the couple? Has he always been stand offish? Does he have health issues down there? Best thing she can do is talk to him go to counseling and try to work on it from there. It doesn't mean he doesn't love her because they don't have sex but there is definitely a reason.
2007-06-28 05:57:54 · answer #1 · answered by Blaqchinah Violation Queen 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously some open communication between the man and the women is needed here. Hows the rest of the relationship ? if its just a sexual issue , then he has something going on , weather it be stress or something else. Talk to him about it. If the whole relationship is suffering then you probably have a much more serious problem. But do not take it personal, that depression it causes you will do more harm to the marriage then not having sex more often. Talk to your man and find out why his lack of interest, if he doesn't know , then let him know how badly it bothers you and how personal you are taking it , and ask him to talk to his doctor about it. He could be suffering from low testosterone or many other things.
2007-06-28 05:56:20 · answer #2 · answered by EGOman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you say pleases her--i wonder do they never actually have sex, have sex a few times a month or not at all in a month. The problem has to be lack of communication---I would say before she starts to pack her bags or better yet contemplate suicide that she at least--tries a few things to see if it gets his attention. Something odd that would place him in a very tempting situation. They are married so I don't see anything wrong with it--Go by his job for a little light 'lunch', make sure when he walks in from work you give him a nice 'hello'...things of that nature. I don't know of one red blooded American guy who wouldn't turn down getting pleased and that would lead right into sex. Now if he refuses or just isn't turned on, then that's another story all together. But she should not feel down because he just may be going through something. They are married and comm--uni cation (get that) is the key, so if all fails I would just tell him---you gonna give me some tonight!
2007-06-28 05:55:00 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he has a psyical problem that he is ashamed of admitting. If that was the case it would make her feel much better. There is help for that. There can be great love in relationships without sex. Intamacy is more than sex, it is the interaction of love between two people. Words can be the most wonderful thing. A touch of a hand, a breathy kiss behind the ear. Maybe he doesn't feel like she loves him anymore. Maybe the two should try a frist date all over again and not expect to make love, but go with the flow.
2007-06-28 05:55:32 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good question... And very sad... We all need affection, tenderness, love in action although, I think that the sex part is like the icing on the cake. When still desiring sex and your partner doesn't, it can be the emptiest, lonely feeling ever. I moved into a different bedroom when this happened in my life and eventually, divorced the man who with held. I am still on my own yet I no longer feel rejected. Hope things work out for you... Am sending you a hug!
2007-06-28 06:01:13 · answer #5 · answered by gypsey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know how a lot of times a man and woman are sexually connected, but not emotionally connected and thats y a male and female never get sex?...well this is an opposite case where a male and female are emotionally connected, but not physically. What can I say...Would you have sex with someone who talks to you everyday for a while, but never talks emotionally or romantically? ....think about it
2007-06-28 06:00:35 · answer #6 · answered by seano 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont know. but i know someone with basically the same issue. well, this man sleeps in his chair rather than come to the bed. he may come to the bed 3 - 4 times a year. and then it is for sex only. but still 3 -4 times a year??? How old is the guy you're talking about? maybe there is a medical issue?
2007-06-28 05:52:55 · answer #7 · answered by just me #1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is my current situation... Are you sure you're not one of my close friends that I have told this to??? LOL
Seriously... my husband has just recently confided in me that he has ED. He is afraid that if he attempts to please me and it fails that I would give up on us. So, he just holds me, tells me he loves me... and we fall asleep. I blamed myself for a long long time, thinking maybe the 10 pounds I gained was a turn off to him.
Have her talk to him. It is a very sensitive subject, but we have discovered that our love is strong... and after being married for as long as we have been, maybe it is time for the sexual part of our relationship to take a back seat to the intimate part of our relationship. Since finding out what the problem actually is, we talk more. See if he will talk to her....
good luck!!!
2007-06-28 05:58:42 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
does a child sleep in the room with them? if not then there is definitly a problem. maybe he's gay and doesn't A. Know it, or B. Doesn't want to admit it. It IS possible to love someone very deeply and not have sexual intercourse of ANY kind. maybe a trip to the doctor is in order. best of luck, no sex sucks :(
2007-06-28 05:53:58 · answer #9 · answered by xxtr8sbabygurlxx 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all wise up love yourself first. Communciate with him and ask him if he seeing some one else. Seek help marriage counseling or just pray to God to show why this man is not giving you the attention you deserve. Pray daily so that depression would not enter your heart. Be strong
2007-06-28 06:01:32 · answer #10 · answered by Curiousone 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋