Sport: So can't us Brits(The worlds greatest minds) think up a new sport we can win?

Question

And my apologies for where this is posted as is meant to be general sport!

Answer 1

The Sarcastic Olympics would be good. We could have all the usual sports but the Brits could sit at the sides making comments about female shotputters thighs, swimmers being shaped like ironing boards, 4 foot tall gymnasts with pony tails who are actually 32 and Australians.

Answer 2

Ever play 43 man Squamish?
Squamish is played on a five-sided field, or Flutney, and the game is normally played within seven 15-minute Ogres, or eight if it's raining.

Each team consists of one left and one right Inside Grouch, one left and one right Outside Grouch, four Deep Brooders, four Shallow Brooders, five Wicket Men, three Offensive Niblings, four Quarter-Frummerts, two Half-Frummerts, one Full-Frummert, two Overblats, two Underblats, nine Back-Up Finks, two Leapers and a Dummy — for a total of 43.

The game officials are a Probate Judge (dressed as a British judge, with wig), a Field Representative (in a Scottish kilt), a Head Cockswain (in long overcoat), and a Baggage Smasher (dressed as a male beachgoer in pre-World War I years). None has any authority after play has begun.

Equipment
An Official Pritz (or ball) is 3-3/4 inches in diameter. It is constructed from untreated Ibex hide, and is stuffed with Blue Jay feathers.
Each player is equipped with a Frullip; a long, hooked stick very similar in appearance to a shepherd's crook. It is used to prevent opposing players from scoring with the Pritz.
Gloves, a helmet, and flippers are also required in an official Squamish game. Any extra padding is suggested, but optional.

Gameplay
Before any game, the Probate Judge must first flip a coin, usually a new Spanish peseta, while the Visiting Captain guesses the toss. If he guesses correctly, the game is cancelled immediately. If not, the Home Team Captain must then decide if he wishes to play offense or defense first. Play begins after a frullip is touched to the flutney and the recitation "My uncle is sick but the highway is green!" is intoned in Spanish. Penalties are applied for infractions such as walling the Pritz, icing on fifth snivel, running with the mob, rushing the season, inability to face facts, and sending the Dummy home early.

The offensive team has five Snivels (equivalent to downs in football) to advance to the enemy goal. Carrying the Pritz across the goal line is a Woomik and scores 17 points; hitting it across with the frullip counts as a Durmish and only scores 11 points. Except in the 7th Ogre (and the 8th, if it rains), only the offensive Niblings and Overblats are allowed to score. In this case, the four Quarter-Frummerts are allowed to kick or throw the Pritz, and the nine Finks are allowed to heckle the opposition by doing imitations of Barry Goldwater.

The teams are to play a sudden-death overtime to break a tie, unless both Left Overblats are out of the game on personal fouls. If this is the case, the tie is settled by the teams lining up on opposite sides of the flutney and shouting dirty limericks at each other until one side breaks up laughing.

When an insufficient number of players precludes a regulation 43-man squamish match, a simplified version may be played: 2-man squamish. The rules are the same, except in 2-man squamish, the object is to lose.

Answer 3

We are top in moaning but not doing anything about it, followed closely by gossiping.

Seriously though, we have many champions in sport but they're not publicised by the media because its not as exciting as Beckhams new hair cuts.

Answer 4

Yes i have sitting in a council flat drinking special brew blaming Johnny foreigner for every thing

Answer 5

Yeah World Pub Games...Pint lifting contest, 100 yard stagger and Drunken Wrestling

Answer 6

How about 100 metres whinging? Us Aussies could never beat you at THAT sport.

Answer 7

Well, don't ya'll have croquet?

I mean, the concept never really took off here in the states. Maybe just perfect one before moving on to another.

Answer 8

we watch & play sports but we don't win them.

end of story.

Answer 9

How about sitting around on our arses complaining... We're the best at doing that.

Answer 10

might be a start if we won the sports that are around right now......