the guy i like has an abusive wife. we are ' JUST FRINEDS" casue niether of us wants to be a cheater. although we both like each other and have admitted so. anwyys he emailed me yesutrday and i wrote him back and sent him a link about abuse and told him his wife fits several of the crieteria of abuse and that i m just trying to help out of concern & care and that i am just bein a freind and i hope he is not offended cuase i felt like he was reaching out to me by telling me some of the abusive behaviors hes had to endure. i aslo sent him a child support calcuator becuase he was concenred on how much he would have to pay if he dumped her and im in a legal class and we are learning how to calculate the paymetns online at the courts web site. today he didnt write back. do u think i've scared him off, or am i reading too much into it?
2007-06-27 18:42:09 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
sometimes people just need you to listen and aren't necessarily looking for advice. your help may have made him feel inadequate as a man because as a man he may feel that he can take care of himself and he can handle his situation. it also seems that, because you have something to gain, that you want him to get out of his situation so that you don't have to be cheaters.
2007-06-27 18:46:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Stop pretending that you're just trying to help, when the real reason you're doing it is to get the guy to dump his wife and be with you (despite your comment about not wanting to be a cheater...sorry, but actions speak lounder than words). I say butt out of his business and let him do his own research, unless he specifically asks for your help to send him links and help him calculated payments. You probably scared him off, which would be a good thing.
2007-06-28 01:51:17 · answer #2 · answered by ((♫♥♪♫♥♪♫ Shivers ♫♥♪♫♥♪)) 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I think you did alot for him as a friend and you should leave the rest to him. After all, it is his family problem. Try not to get involved with it. It will turn out messy. Just leave him alone to think over and maybe give him more time. Let him try to fix things his way.
2007-06-28 01:54:32 · answer #3 · answered by Ashley 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Hey Wholy, Sounds to me like your just trying to stir up some trouble. If you know his wife is abusive to him then you better back off before she beats your meddeling little ***! Get yourself a life. They are married, hear me married!! You refer to him as the "guy I like" that sound pretty suspicious to me........ Plus the fact that you empasized that you are "JUST FRIENDS" is another red flag in my book! Hopefully he will not write you back and avoid a whole lot of heartache for all of you. I personally think that you are the one that is abusive!!!!
2007-06-28 01:51:28 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
I think you should give it a day before you start to worry.. but if you want to worry.. i would be worried she saw the email you sent to him. That happened to me once and it was ugly. I hope I didnt scare you off.
2007-06-28 01:44:42 · answer #5 · answered by neverdugdisco 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I hope so. He needs to sort out his problems with his wife by seeking the advise of a professional.
2007-06-28 01:57:39 · answer #6 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Unless you have seen the abuse I wouldn't be too sure about it. You should know that men who cheat on their wives will say anything.
2007-06-28 02:07:50 · answer #7 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Its hard to say...it might just take him a few days to realize that you are doing him a favor.. Give him a little space, then tell him that you werent trying to get too personal...just being a concerned friend.
2007-06-28 01:45:44 · answer #8 · answered by helicopterjen 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋
I don't think you scared him off. I think he just hasn't had enough time to write back. He thinks you are really helping him a lot and is very grateful. Don't worry!
2007-06-28 01:58:45 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
OMG. Get over yourself. Yes you "scarred him off." He realized you weren't worth wrecking his family for.
2007-06-28 01:52:12 · answer #10 · answered by ashleyok 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋