My ex-husband constantly leaves messages for me saying that I caused all of the problems in our daughter's life. She is 15 now and did not do well in school this past year. She basically failed her Math Class.
He has sole physical and legal custody. I live in another state.
I have always been willing for her to come stay with me. He was never willing to give me legal custody.
He wants us to live in a new state where he has moved. We would all get a fresh start in a new town.
He has told my daughter that she can not stay with him because of her grades. I don't understand that.
He says that all of my inactions over the past few years have hurt our daughter only.
I am so confused. I can't work, eat or sleep.
I want to help my daughter in the best way possible so that she is a success in life.
He keeps saying its a serious issue because of her low grades so far in High School.
How should I handle the situation and really help my child?
2007-06-27 17:49:30 · 5 answers · asked by Stareyes 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He says, he says, Hello! Its another way of manipulating you- another example of HIS lack of parenting. He is constantly putting you down, making you feel worthless just as he has done in the past- its not going to change. Who had custody- who was to be supervising her and making sure the homework is done- not you so, why are you allowing him to constantly destroy you? Perhaps its about time to put some back on his plate- don't you think? Tell him send her- if he is saying negative(she CANNOT stay with him because of her grades) then its certainly going to affect her. Time to stand up to him honey- take your daughter- finish raising her- love her and yourself--YOUR BOTH WORTH IT.
2007-06-28 09:09:55 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should concentrate on your daughter and stop paying attention to what he says. It seems like he's still pissed off at you because of your divorce, especially if you have moved on. Maybe your separation was not the answer to him, and it was really hard (because it usually is), so now he trys to take it out on you. Remember that the teen years are the worst, and your daughter needs to feel important and loved by both of you. I know it's hard, and you are probably saying " yeah, say that to my ex ", he's the one who needs to understand. Which I agree, but still, giving it your best will help your daughter and if he doesn't cooperate and keeps talking s**t to you, then simply ignore him, because after all, he is the one with physical and legal custody. He is the one that drops her off and picks her up from school. So, just move on and take care of your daughter, and focus on her only....
2007-06-28 02:13:01 · answer #2 · answered by nelly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HE'S A JERK!!!,DON'T LET HIM GET TO YOU.IF HE HAS SOLE CUSTODY. THAN HOW IN THE H#LL CAN HE BLAME YOU FOR ANYTHING. JUST WHO DOES SHE LIVE WITH! HE IS JUST LOOKING FOR A SCAPE GOAT. DON'T ALLOW HIM TO PUT HIS FAILINGS AS A FATHER ON YOU. HOW TO HANDLE IT? TELL HIM THAT YOU'LL TAKE CUSTODY OF HER. SEE WHAT HE DOES. IF HE ALLOWS IT, FINE. YOUR DAUGHTER WILL MORE THAN LIKELY BE BETTER OFF. AND SO WILL YOU........GOOD LUCK
2007-06-28 01:26:07 · answer #3 · answered by Gunny 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like he never got over your divorce and blames all the problems on you... however maybe if you were a bit more involved in her life .... try a private tutor and summer school
2007-06-28 01:03:05 · answer #4 · answered by imnickdell 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
MAKE THE OFFER AGAIN AND LET IT GO IF HE SAY'S NO!
HE HAS TO BLAME SOMEONE FOR HIS FAILURE TO RAISE HER THINKING RIGHT! IT WAS ALL HIS DOING, RIGHT?
UNLESS SHE EXPRESSES TO YOU THAT YOUR NOT BEING THERE FOR HER HAS HER DO THE THINGS SHE DOES, THEN I WOULD NOT LOOSE A NIGHTS SLEEP. GOOD LUCK
2007-06-28 01:05:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋