My wife has been distant since 2000 and no sex since 2004. I do have "parkinsons disease" and for a while had to take something the doctor prescribed to make a part of me work but don't need it anymore since my part works fine again. Still no sex and she is gone for a long while on her days off shopping and such. No closeness just indifference. Any advice?More to her actions but too much to put here. Lets just say phone calls from other men and such. Brusises on her inner thighs, strange cars go by at all hours and stop in my driveway(that was going on while i was unable to get out of bed at night, has not happened in a long while, since I can get out of bed when I want to now.). All I want is proof for me to make sure I am not being overly suspious. Can't divorce her as I will need someone to take care of me when I get bad. She told me that no one would want me anyway. Just need a little advice.
2007-06-27 17:21:44 · 11 answers · asked by anoldspringchicken 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Sorry about your condidtion dude, but your going to have to be really strong for the next chapter in your life. That must be to get rid of her and find maybe profesional medical help for your condition of relatives.
I hate telling men that thier wives sound like they are cheating, but from what you have written here, the wool has been pulled over your eyes and the suspision you are feeling is natural and very understandable. Also how dare she tell you something so awful. You are married to one another to care and love one another, not depress your partner to the point where they feel worthless. This is not good for you. I understand where your commning from with your condition, however if you stay in the situation you are in now, you are only going to feel worse. Id rather be free and happy than trapped and unhappy. Good luck, dont depend on her, depend on you and the medical community. Be strong its not going to be easy at first, but time does help. Good Luck Brother!
2007-06-27 17:40:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry about your disease. I am going to be frank. Ask yourself these questions. If all you want her for is to take care of you when you get bad then could you really say you would blame her if she did? She obviously cares for you or she would not have stayed with you, would she? Has she taken care of you? Have you done all you can do on your part to take care of her? If you won't divorce her anyway ...knowing or not....Then what does it matter to you? I think it is wrong, yes. I know I don't know the entire story, only what you have written but to an outsider it might sound like you are using each other. Remember this...don't put yourself down so much and that just because you have a disease doesn't mean your life is over. Wake up and start living the life you have left dear.
Set down and "talk" with her and be honest. Try to remember what attracted the two of you to each other in the first place.
2007-06-27 17:36:23 · answer #2 · answered by TabbyFtStewartGA 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She sounds like a cheating wife to me. Instead of worrying, just make sure she's doing this and then leave her. You don't need someone like that. My own father had this same problem too with his wife (my mom). She was up at odd hours phoning the guy. He was very trusting. I am sorry that you have Parkinsons. There are many other wives I have seen out there who take good care of their best friend (their husband) even though he has something wrong with him – and vice versa. Hopefully you will be able to find care that is from someone other than her like a son, daughter or relative.
2007-06-27 17:28:58 · answer #3 · answered by green sky means run 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow! What would you like us to say?? You certainly have reason for suspicion, and need to be prepared for the inevitable.
To prove: one may go to Radio Shack and find phone recording devices. Not recognized as lawful, but an avenue to fulfill your suspicions.
Her cell phone will have calls in and out. Also, I'm sure Mr Hanky Panky is in her address book under some code name.
Discreet cameras are also available if you think you really want to watch her.
Just following her in a car will be easily uncover her whereabouts. Place pictures in a manila folder and place it on her dresser :)
Good luck, We all feel for your condition, our hearts goes out to you.
2007-06-27 18:08:48 · answer #4 · answered by Nana Butterfly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my gosh! She is SO cheating. I know because I am cheating too, and I have always made sure that none of the things you mentioned were obvious. If you have noticed these things, then much more has probably went unnoticed! I hate to rain on your parade, but that is cold-hearted what she said about no one would want you anyway. I'm not sure what she is thinking, but I would suggest thinking long and hard about keeping her around.
2007-06-27 17:35:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
signs of a cheat? in addition to what you have said ..and i know its hard to belive but trust me...you will be glad you confronted her
always "busy"
cant make set plans
never hears the phone ring
comes home late (or says they have to work late)
always with friends doing NOTHING special
very sneaky with the cell phone (turns phone on silent around you)
and the simple fact that she said no one would want you anyway is SICK..confront her! and you dont NEED her..im sure you have family or friends..dont ever depend on someone to make you happy..
im sorry this is happening to you..be strong and good luck
2007-06-27 17:32:22 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
pal you can put a recorder on your phone and this is legal . if she has ben acting different .happy. cleaning up mor. happy. calls come in and she tells you it was either a bill collecter or wrong number . she is i would place a recorder on my phone as well millage on the car as well you can install a carmera in the car pictures or voices dont lie in my opion? ref<< ben there and divorced now my .ex. over the same thing in.2002?
2007-06-27 17:57:36 · answer #7 · answered by the_silverfoxx 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look in the yellow pages under private investigator,and hire one to find out whats going on,thats what I would do.
2007-06-27 17:30:17 · answer #8 · answered by sasyone 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you could hire a private dectective but why bother it will only depress you even more... no i say try to get the romance back in motion
2007-06-27 17:32:55 · answer #9 · answered by imnickdell 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'de say the second she said knowone would want you with your condition,I'de be able to decifer that at once...............
I think it's pretty much over guy Ide be making plans to move on,and her moving out!
2007-06-27 17:28:47 · answer #10 · answered by rpoker 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋