I have been married to husband #2 for a year and a half. I have a three year old with him. I have 2 older boys with Hubby #1. I haven't seen Hubby #1 in 10 years, due to drugs. Well Hubby 1 is clean for the past 4 years and is back in his kids live. Well hubby 2 who has little or nothing to do with my other 2 kids does not like this at all. I am not allowed to have any contact with hubby 1 at all. Not even if it's about the kids. God forbid he finds out that I had any contact with him my life isn't worth living. What do I do?
2007-06-27 14:22:32 · 5 answers · asked by Buffy39 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
tell him that those boys need a father in their life and that #1 has cleaned up and is going to visit with them. if he has to, have him get a court order to do so.tell him that your not going to be around the ex but the boys need a man in their lives and your husband isnt filling that need.you shouldnt be that controlled by #2 .ive been through 3 divorces and no man has ever told me what to do.stand up for your self.if your scared of #2 there are womens shelters in every state.ive been to one.they are not bad like people try to make them.they offer great help and support.
2007-06-27 14:46:30 · answer #1 · answered by marilynfsmgm 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hubby #2 needs to grow up. These are your kids and you know what if he doesnt treat them the way he should there would be no question what to do. He'd be gone. When you get with someone who has kids you take the whole deal or nothing at all. He doesnt deserve to be in the presents for your older kid period!
2007-06-27 21:29:45 · answer #2 · answered by lyttledarlin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to be very careful with your ex and I'm not surprised that your present husband doesn't want your ex in your kids life. You should not want to have your kids jump into your ex's life just because he has been clean for 4 yrs. He doesn't deserve it and your kids don't need to see an unstable and unsure person unsupervised. This is a very tricky situation. Don't put your children or your marriage on the line for such a person regardless of your present husbands relationship with the kids. Your present husband really doesn't have a say on how you want to handle this with your ex, but your gut should give you the right way to go and you should have the ability to talk about this with your husband. Talk to him and try to work it out. There is a way that everyone gets what they want but within guidelines.
2007-06-27 21:43:59 · answer #3 · answered by dawnb 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally hubby #2 sounds like a jerk to me. He has little or nothing to do with your other kids? Why would you be with someone who doesn't even acknowledge your kids, let alone marry them?
It sounds like HE has some issues HE has to deal with and he's taking it out on you and your other kids.
2007-06-27 21:42:29 · answer #4 · answered by DelinquentGurl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell hubby-2 that if he doesn't trust hubby-1 it's one thing but he has no reasons to not trust You! His little controlling game he has going on with you is because he thinks you can't be trusted with other men....very manipulative.
2007-06-27 21:39:15 · answer #5 · answered by Jane Marple 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋