I cant stand it when my wife goes out on the pull please help!!?

Question

I cant stand my wife going out with her girl friends until 3am dressed to pull.
she spend hours getting ready for going out with her mates, and comes in at 3am.
I cant help it I get so para that she has been chatting up other blokes etc. I get so jelous but cant control it as it feels like a threat to our relationship.
Whenever we go anywhere she does not put as much effort into getting dulled up why??? it makes me feel as if im not as important as her mates.
she says she loves me more than anything and we have 2 children and that she wants nobody else but waiting up until 3am wondering what is happening is making me stress what can i do to stop these feelings as I know it is not fair on her.

She goes out once or twice a month but would do more as I stay in looking after the kids.
However when I want to take her out she finds an excuse like I cant get a babysitter or when we are out she worries about the kids and we have to go home at about 11pm maybee it is me i have threatened to end the relationship because I have been so upset before.

Answer 1

sounds like she is to comfortable with you.. she wants her cake and eat it to. try shaking things up alittle and you go out. stay out till 3 am and show her how it feels..


go jr go

Answer 2

I feel really sorry for you. If I had a mate doing that, I would feel very hurt and suspicious. What she says and what she thinks may be two different things. If she were content at home, there would be no reason to be going out clubbing. I wonder how she'd feel if you were doing the same thing? Are any suspicious things happening? It seems like she's out trolling for men and/or attention. It is not very thoughtful of her to leave you home worrying like that. I think you should start doing the same thing and bring this situation to a head. Go buy some Gucci cologne. I swear, it will drive the women nuts! Give her some of her own medicine! If she makes a stink, tell her that you aren't going to quit until she quits! If you're headed for a divorce, get it over with. If she's madly in love with you, forcing her to feel how you have been feeling will hopefully make her stop and think. If she doesn't care or is just mad because she has to care for the kids by herself and not because she thinks you might find another woman to replace her, then the marriage is quickly coming to an end. I am sorry you are suffering so!

Answer 3

Dude, hate to say it but you need to grow a set. If she is getting dressed up and going out with her friends till 3am without you then you have got some serious problems.

Again it does depend on how often, where they go and if you have a reciprocal arrangement where you can go out as well.

It also depends on her home situation, is she a housewife, does she have a stressfull job etc

If she is going out once in a while, like every month or six weeks then thats not to bad, if its every week then there is a severe issue.

You need to tell her that she cant do it anymore. Tell her you want a divorce, leave her, get her to sign a post nuptual agreement that says if she ever cheats on you she gets nothing including the kids.

Hire a private investigator.

Alternatively shedule some romatic outing and get babysitters if she is still into going out with her friends at your expense, you do the math.

Also if your friends with the other girls partner you could discuss it with them.

Its your relationship man but your self respect is a big thing. As the song goes "no womans worth crawling on the earth so walk like a man"

Answer 4

Flirting with other men makes your wife feel sexy. As long as she is only flirting then there shouldn't be a problem. When you take her out is it to the same kind of places that she goes with her friends? Try taking her to a swingers club. There is no pressure to do anything you don't want to do. This way she can get all dressed up and feel sexy with you right there. Also, you will get your ego stroked by flirting with other woman in the club. She may find that she can't deal with it, but it's not fair to leave you at home while she's out partying. Talk to each other honestly. Flirting is innocent and a huge turn on. You may find this to be a way to fan the flames of your passion for each other. Give it a try. It has worked great for my husband and me. We do not swap and have never felt any pressure to do so. When we get home though, we are both so turned on the sex is amazing. Good luck.

Answer 5

am going through a similar the same thing bro and your not mad i know u love her and u want to fix things, some ladies have a very sick idea of dealing with things but yes she should not of done it but before u move without thinking in the bible the word sad husband stick with your wife and wives stick with your husband any women is capable of this even the ones that are saying that they will not the reason y is because its a choice and treating a woman bad helps them to make that decision my wife had an affair with a dj and the dj got her pregnant and i have been spending money for 10 years now on her for us to have a baby working 12 hour shift and overtime on my day offs and u know what this guy came from nowhere had sex with my wife and she got pregnant and the tough thing is i know am suppose to leave her but i love her to death so dont feel is u alone it dose be very difficult especially when u really love someone my advice dont give up unless your sure .

Answer 6

You wife is not going out to "pull". But if you keep your jealous behaviour she might think about it. Getting dressed up to go out with your girlfriends is very different that getting dressed up to go out with your husband. First of all you are not going to look better than her and women, no matter how great there friendship is don't want to look worse than any of their friends. Hence the hours of hair, make up and wardrobe to go out with the girls. Second, there is nothing wrong with a little bit of flirting. It lets her know she still has it but lets face she hasn't cheated on you so she is saving everything shes got just for you. So relax and the next she goes out with the girls, hire a sitter and you go out with the guys, have some fun and see how much that helps your mood and relationship.
Good Luck.

Answer 7

Whether she's chatting up blokes or not, this is a threat. You feel unappreciated and left out.

Do you go out with your own friends until 3 am? Do these girlfriends have husbands/bfs of their own? You could try doing something with them.

What about counseling to see what's going on here?

Answer 8

You should sit down with her and tell her straight out and without anger how you feel, and why you feel that way...She should really be putting her family (thats you and the kids and your feelings) before her friends. You guys might need some counseling if the sit down with her doesn't persuade her to change a little.

Answer 9

i think there is more that meets the eye here and shes not telling it all. i knew a couple where the womand did the same thing and the guy took it over for about a year and divorced she was fooling around so therefore i would suggest you just fiel and get rid of her she s not for you anym ore you have let her go to far and shes not ready to commit to soemthing any more

Answer 10

no it is not fair( to YOU!).. mayeb you should sit her down and talk to her... i mean if she goes out with her friends like once like every 2 or 3 months it might be different. Maybe you should suggest some counseling or start taking her out on night on the town once in a while yourself ( do you?) I hope you all do ok... best wishes

Answer 11

She is feeling like she did before having kids and a man. She wants to feel attractive again. You need to really talk to her about all this. Are you neglecting her in any sort of way???? I would not like my husband staying out all night with his buddies and dressing up.... maybe once in a great while he will go out.. but you need to talk to her.