Shouldn't you exhaust all other options first?
2007-06-27 04:40:15 · 12 answers · asked by Kristy s 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Absolutely. I'm a marriage counselor so I see this all day long. People tend to think divorce is an easy way out and will solve all of their problems. They don't realize it's like dealing with a death... more often than not there's regret, ruined lives, and many other consequences.
In some cases, like abuse or infidelity or addictions, yes divorce is the only option and even then it's still too bad. But the whole "we fell out of love," "I love him but I'm not in love with him," "I have been neglecting my needs," etc is nothing but crap.
Studies have actually shown that couples who are considering divorce and stick through it and work on their problems report having happy marriages again 5 years later. It's sad so many people give up too soon. Everyone goes through problems in their marriage; people seem to think it will be blissful the whole time.
2007-06-27 04:48:08 · answer #1 · answered by Yogi 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I think that people don't work on it and "divorce" has become a possible way out. People use divorce as a threat when it should NEVER be brought up in a conversation. When two people get married they should honor that commitment and exhaust all possibilities before splitting. Sure there are circumstances where divorce is necessary. My parents were in a HORRIBLE marriage and had they not divorced I would not be mentally healthy. However many people just get divorced because it is the easy thing to do
2007-06-27 04:47:56 · answer #2 · answered by luvmypups 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I feel your question has 2 parts.
Yes, it is too easy to obtain a divorce.
That is why there are so many divorces.
And not enough 40, 50 year marriages.
It's too easy to just walk away.
But on the other hand.
No, it is never easy to obtain a divorce. There are always feelings involved. And those are usually hurt feelings. So I think divorce is one of the hardest things to go through.
Whether it's your choice or your spouse's choice, it hurts either way.
2007-06-27 04:49:34 · answer #3 · answered by MommaBear 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would say that many marriages that end in divorce did not exhaust all options. Some view it as an easier way out than working on the relationship.
2007-06-27 04:44:42 · answer #4 · answered by David B 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Way too easy! When you can go to the mall, visit the legal store and get fill in the blank divorce papers, something is wrong! And by the way what is no-fault divorce, if no one is at fault why would there be a divorce in the first place? Sorry little things like that get to me!
2007-06-27 07:55:33 · answer #5 · answered by Rock H 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is way too easy to obtain a divorce these days. I don't think divorce should be granted so quickly and so easily. Under extreme circumstances such as abuse cases ok, but I am pissed at you cases should be sent to counseling first, this way even if the divorce does occur both individuals will be more fit to stand on their own feet and face the world.
2007-06-27 04:49:14 · answer #6 · answered by 20+ years and still in-love! 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I agree 110%. Too many people view marriage as disposable and when the going gets rough they throw in the towel. Divorce should be a last resort only. Counseling should be first pursued. I favor states that have a cooling off period before a divorce is granted, or require continuous separation for a few months before filing.
2007-06-27 04:47:39 · answer #7 · answered by Eyota Zen 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Nope!!!!! No! Nadda! Its too easy to get married! It should be nipped in the bud before the license is applied for.
If we had had some kind of counseling, maybe I would have seen the behavior that would have made me suspect that my soon to be husband was an abuser. He was all sweet and good until about 3 years into the marriage then wam!!! all hell broke loose. And believe me death sometimes seemed the only way out...until I realized it wasn't. If the divorce had been harder I might have been stuck with an abusive man, and in turn would have eventually taken my life. Because believe me when there is nothing, no children, no love, only hate and anger and you spend your every free moment in fear, death starts looking very appealing.
2007-06-27 04:43:58 · answer #8 · answered by gypsy g 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
If you get divorced - you can exhaust all other options if you choose -- but, when you don't love the person - or they treat you like crap- I say - get out.. why waste how many more years of your life unhappy!!!
2007-06-27 04:48:33 · answer #9 · answered by ★★★ Katharine ♥♥♥♥ 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes, all options should be tried before divorce is granted. Some states make it harder than others to get divorced. I wish all states would make it harder, especially if children are involved and there are no abuse issues between the parties.
I also think it should be tougher to get married and the waiting period should be longer and pre-marital counseling should be required.
2007-06-27 04:43:21 · answer #10 · answered by Stefka 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋