SERIOUS ANSWERS please...I'm in love with an older man that's a dom!!!?

Question

I'm 21 and he is 37...I live in La and he lives in Ga. I met him March 26th, 2006. I'm Submissive and he is Dominate. We both love each other... I've gone to visit him 3 times since we've met last year. I'm still a student in college and he owns his own programming business. #1. How do I come out to my mother about my alternate lifestyle? #2. How do I tell her I'm in love with a man who is 37 (the same age as her, she had me at 16) and that he is dom? #3. I'm thinking about transfering to a college out in Ga so I can be closer to him. As many may know a sub/dom relationship is quite hands on... Anyway I want to go to Ga to be closer to him and to get out of my mothers house...It's quite time I leave this city anyway... would that be a good idea?

I quite feel I'm in the closet with my lifestyle, and when I hook up with people down here it doesn't work because there is a side of me that isn't getting nurished...

So what should I do?

I'm a beautiful young lady and he is soo handsome, for the ones who don't know what I mean by "alternative lifestyle" we have bdsm in common...if you don't know what that is, do a little research...

I agree my mother doesn't need to know about the sub/dom part...but what if she wanted to know why I'm leaving town, it would be to pursue my education and to be closer to him...

Answer 1

O Kay you should just tell your mother everything! If she gets mad then leave her alone, let her cool off and then try to explain . I dnt think she has control over your life cuz mine dosent. And the transfering would be a great idea. stop and thnk when your around him are you happy do you feel WHOLE? If so GO TO HIM!

Answer 2

If you are able to be financially independent then go for it. Don't worry about telling your mom the rest just yet. Tell her you want to experience life in another part of the country as well as further your education. Just don't worry about the rest. She might take it better than you think. You can tell her the rest in time at your own pace it might be a lot to hit her with the move AND the relationship, divide the two and tell her the rest when you feel she's ready for it.

Answer 3

Last year, I met my girlfriend. She is 24, I am 48. While I am much older, I am not dominant. In fact, she sets me straight often. We are really pretty evenly tempered. We rarely argue. And we negotiate everything. She moved in with me and my 15 year old son, and we are so grateful to have her. We don't have much, but we are happy. One problem we do have is that I have never met her parents. I am older than both of them. Eventually I plan to meet them, but that issue is not a priority to settle, but that is us.

In your case, I'd be cautious. One thing to consider about a much older partner, and a dominant one at that, is that at some point, you may have to accept people in his past life, because he says you have to. One thing I know about dominant older guys, is that they like to keep old flames in a place where they come back into his life again, at his convenience. That is, until they decide to file a protection order. You may not want to accept these people out of his past. And an environment like that can make you feel over time that you have no control over yourself or anything else. As you get older, you may feel you want to be more independent, and I'm sure he won't allow that. Love is true, but to confuse that with lust can lead you to the cheese that's placed on a mouse trap. I know, I was once a submissive man that let dominating women lead me around. I regret every relationship I had like that. I wasted a lot of time and lost a lot of opportunities. At the end of the day, I'd say you'd do really good to chill out and think really hard about going to him. It may seem like a wonderful thing to do now, but I can nearly guarantee you'll regret it two years from now. My advice, find a NICE older guy that respects you.

Answer 4

"I'm 21 and he is 37"

I didn't even have to read the rest of your question. If you're into the whole dom/sub thing, that's fine, but you do NOT want to be dating a man old enough to be your father. How many young girls need to be used and dumped by older men before they get the picture? You're nothing but a sex toy to him.

Answer 5

I think it's a bad idea to tell your mother of you being sub and he dom. The rest about moving his age yes tell her that. The other part from a mother's point of view she will not understand and find it close to impossible to accept.

Answer 6

First, you should ask this man what he thinks about your common future. Ok, it is not 100% he will say the truth or that will happen what he says. But if the asnwer is positive enough then you may tell your relationship to everybody. The age-difference is a bit strange but nothing else. There is nothing shaming in it. I would say that it is in the normal range, you can even fight for it.

Answer 7

Why do you feel the need to tell your mom about the sub/dom part???? There is no need for your mother to even know that part...

Answer 8

Just wait till I move to LA. You won't need Mr Georgie DOM. Trust me.

Answer 9

The only advice I have for you is not move to GA and enroll in a college there. Mostly likely you will not finish your degree if you do that. Finish your college in LA. Finish your college, period. If your relationship works out, you will have your degree. If it does not, you will have your degree. Your degree is your freedom.

Answer 10

Keep that to yourself, and don't worry your mother with it. She really does not want to know!! I know that I have no interest in what sex games my kids play, as long as it is legal and makes them happy.