Why Do I Hate My Father?

Question

I've never had a good relationship w/ my father. I don't know why. He's not a bad guy and he always proved for my family. But, it seems like he's getting worse. Even after battling cancer and recovering, I still feel this way.

I don't have an authority problem either. I respect my mother, even if I don't always agree with her. But I do not feel the same way about my father.

My parents divorced 2 years ago, and honestly I could not be happier. I just do get along with my father. We have no relationship. Tonight we had a huge blow out over nothing. I didn't overreact to something he said, but I feel a huge amount of anger and tension when he enters a room. I don't know why. I can't pinpoint when I started feeling this way or why.

It's even to the point that, when I get married. I could careless if my father walks me down the aisle. I don't understand girls that get all teary eyed at their weddings when they dance w/ their father. I don't even want that.

What's wrong w/ me? What's the cause of all of this?

I feel like a horrible person for hating my father, but it's such an involunteer act.

Answer 1

Who had cancer? If it was him I am thinking you have psychologically set yourself up in a defensive mode so that the pain of seeing him sickly won't tear you apart. You don't want to feel anything for him so if he gets sick again and doesn't recover you wont have to feel the pain you would if you were close.

Answer 2

I'm only guessing, but due to the fact, no one can review your question,, or answers no profile, very little can be deduced about who you are.
Why you need this power, in your relationship with your farther, is the question.
I would think however that you were hurt very deeply in your younger life, either by your dad or someone that is like your dad.
Once again all that is just conjecture on my part.
If you could find someone you could open up to, and share your "true" feelings with it would help.

Answer 3

Sounds like the result of years and years of not having anything to do with each other. Or maybe your father is critical of you to the point that you choose to keep your distance from him. It is really difficult to say. I mean, why is it that we get along with some people almost automatically, and others will can not stand to even look at or to be in their presence? Their could even be some unresolved issues with your father that are suppressed in your subconscious, and will always be unless you get psychotherapy.

Answer 4

it could be your gut, so listen to it. if something's not right you need to find out why not.

it could just be an underlying issue, a personality conflict.

i also don't know how old you are and maybe its just something you'll go through and work out later in life.

you should discuss it with your dad, even your mom. talk to a counselor.

Answer 5

Talk to your father tell him how you feel. Tell him from your heart. But you also need to loosen up maybe you have hurt his feelings in sme way think about it. I am sure you will resolve things! Good Luck.

Answer 6

i think you know. no one has that much resentment for no reason. a lot of little things thru out the years can be a big thing later on. you need to be honest with yourself. when you started feeling that way doesnt matter.

Answer 7

my sisters the same way with my mom, and it is because my mom was always really mean to her when she was little, maybe your dad was, if so then i guess its completely normal. if not then i dont know why

Answer 8

Are you sure nothing bad happened between you two when you were much younger?

Answer 9

You don't hate your father... you love him.

There is only very tin line between love and hate.

Answer 10

you need professional help to sort these felling out.