What are some funny chemistry jokes you can tell to a teacher?
not to be a suck-up lol don't worry.
2007-06-26 12:15:26 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Science & Mathematics ➔ Chemistry
some of these are lame but give them a crack anyway
Q: What kind of ghosts haunt chemistry faculties?
A: Methylated Spirits.
Q: What do you do when you find a dead chemist?
A: Barium.
Q: What do chemists use to make guacomole?
A: Avogadros (Avogadros <--> advocados get it? lol this is one of the lame ones)
Q: What is Ba(Na)2 ?
A: Banana
Q: Why do white bears dissolve in water?
A: Because they're polar!
2007-06-26 17:49:03 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Funny Chemistry Jokes
2016-10-04 10:54:42 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My chemistry jokes are jokes against chemists (because, you know us engineers are better than scientists. ;) )
* What is the difference between a chemical engineer and a chemist?
$30,000/yr.
* A chemist and an engineer are on one wall of a room. Across the room at the other wall are two women. They are told that if they get to the women they can have them, but they can only cover half the distance each time they move. The engineer starts going, but the chemist stays still. When asked why he didn't go, the chemist replied "Everyone knows that if you can only take half steps, so I could never reach her." To that, the engineer smiled and replied, "I can get close enough."
2007-06-26 13:40:32 · answer #3 · answered by newfaldon 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋
A lad walks into the keep giggling and asks the chemist for a durex and bursts out giggling louder.The chemist provides him the durex and the lad leaves the keep giggling. The lad does a similar the subsequent evening and yet another 6 nights working ,constantly giggling. finally the chemist says to to the lad your directly to a robust ingredient,can i ask you who the fortunate woman is.The lad replys your daugher.
2016-10-19 00:50:12 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
An atom walked into a bar (or a restaurant) and asked: Did you find an electron in here?
Bartender (or waiter): No we didn't. Are you sure you lost one?
Atom: Yep, I'm positive!
2007-06-26 12:20:08 · answer #5 · answered by ecolink 7 · 8⤊ 0⤋
How's about...
A neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. "How much is that"? it asks the bartender. The bartender replies, "For you? No charge"
If that doesn't get a chuckle from him, show him this website:
http://www.chm.bris.ac.uk/sillymolecules/sillymols.htm
2007-06-26 12:21:25 · answer #6 · answered by Katie Z 3 · 7⤊ 0⤋
Epitaph:
Here lies Mr. Everett Goof,
Alas, he is no more,
For what he thought was H2O
Was H2SO4.
Another is on Werner Heisenburg's tombstone:
(remember his uncertainty principle?)
"I lie somewhere over here."
2007-06-26 12:43:51 · answer #7 · answered by bbwannab 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
What kind of cars do chemists drive?
Mercedes Benzene
2007-06-26 12:23:25 · answer #8 · answered by chipmunkian 2 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Little Willie was a chemist,
Little Willie is no more,
What he thought was H2O,
Was H2SO4
Little Willie full of glee,
Put radium in grandma's tea.
Now he finds it quite a lark,
To see her shining in the dark.
Heisenberg was speeding on the freeway when a policeman stopped him. As the officer swagers up and asks "Do you know how fast you were going?" Heisenberg replies...........................wait......................................................................................................................wait......................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................."No, but I know where I am!'
2007-06-26 15:54:49 · answer #9 · answered by kentucky 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋