I had a medical abortion a year ago,it was a painful experience(physically and emotionally). I dont want to go in any details but when i was losing blood (the nurse said the baby would be dispelled) but i didnt expect to see it!it was so tiny and i picked it up and put it in tissue,then buried it in the garden the next day. Everytime i see a baby it makes me think of the one i would of had,and i wonder what sex it would have been. Do you think god wanted to make me feel guilty by showing me my tiny dead baby?
2007-06-26 09:38:12 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
For those of you with the insensitive comments,you dont know the full story as to why i did what i did,read up medical abortion if you dont believe me,you have obviously never been in this situation.
2007-06-26 10:16:32 · update #1
its OK Hun i had pretty much the same experience as yourself and was shocked that they didn't tell me this could happen,,,,it felt awful but time has made it a lot easier...these ignorant dicks don't actually know what a medical abortion is (how stupid to comment on something they know nothing about!!!) when i had mine it took a week for the dead baby to come out (and yes it did look very baby like...look it up all you dickheads) and i was in the most awful situation i went through the same feelings as yourself but i know think that its survival of the fittest and it would have been cruel to bring a child into the world in the wrong circumstance...in time you will feel better...all my love (ignore those idiots)
2007-06-26 10:36:45 · answer #1 · answered by Shell 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
That's just not a very good arguement. Most people cannot recall things before the age of four. Does that mean that children are a non-entity before their first recallable memory? One reason that people might be against abortion is because of a belief in the sanctity of life, and the unknowable extent and realms of human consciousness. Abortion can also leave a sustained psychological and physical impact on the woman. The following is a statement of facts, the reality of the two choices, not a moral judgement: - there is a gulf between the necessary attentiveness to protect and nurture a baby as it develops in the womb, and making a decision to have it sucked out in pieces. I think you will find that abortions are not occurring at "a week or two old", but I don't think that is the point anyway. A foetus isn't "supposed to be human", it is human. Many would argue for pro-choice (and the choice of contraception is widely free and available in the UK), but in any case, abortion is not something to promote or be flippant about.
2016-05-21 02:16:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been through a medical abortion as well. I'm surprised they didn't tell you that you might be able to see the fetus (depending on how far along you are). They told me this was a possibility, but as I was only 3 weeks along the fetus was only about the size of a pea and certainly wasn't the shape of a baby. I can't imagine having seen it like you did.
Despite the difficulty of possibly having to see your fetus I have read that most women tend to prefer medical abortions simply because they seem more natural and are less invasive.
I certainly don't think god is trying to make you feel guilty. I too am having a difficult time emotionally after the fact even though I know the abortion was the best decision for me. Everyone deserves forgiveness for the mistakes they make in their life and everyone makes mistakes. The hardest part is forgiving yourself.
2007-06-26 18:35:07 · answer #3 · answered by gjs2113 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Um, what you more than likely saw was a blood clot. At the time when most medical abortions are performed, the fetus is actually so small that it is indistinguishable from the blood clots that are expelled along with it.
Which week did you have the medical abortion?
Before 8 weeks, the fetus is the size of a small bean or seed (or smaller) and in ultrasounds looks like a tadpole. It would not look like an actual baby, it would be much too small.
And no, God would not want you to feel guilty because obviously this was something you had to do based on your situation. God understands what you were going through and loves you. She would not want you to feel bad about something you felt compelled to do.
I hope you feel better and have someone who is nonjudgemental to talk to about this experience. Best of luck!
Peace,
Jenn
2007-06-26 11:40:49 · answer #4 · answered by jenn_smithson 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know what you are going through as I have been through the same thing. My heart goes out to you as I know how you're feeling.
Having such an experience makes you think about life in a whole different perspective. You tend to feel really guilty and I felt like a 'murderer'. The only thing I could suggest is moving on. It's hard but it has to happen. It happened to me 3 years ago and I still remember the physical and emotional pain I went through. I remember the date and I remember the intense guilt I felt.
I don't think you need to God to make you feel guilty, I think you have realised what you have done is wrong and the only way to correct it, is to make sure that your future does not repeat your past. You need to think to yourself whether you can put yourself through that experience again and whether you want to bury another child of yours again.
At least you know that when you have a child next time or when you next concieve, it will be in an incentive to give your next child a life to remember. You can not replace the life of your first but you can always try and make up for it. Anytime you see a baby you tend to think how old your child would have been, what sex it would have been, what it would have been doing etc etc but it is all part of the mourning process.
I believe the whole abortion thing is wrong in certain circumstances and it seems you did it as you had no choice but babes, ask for forgiveness and learn to forgive yourself as long as you dont repeat it and talking about it might help
Good Luck, I know its not easy xxx
2007-06-26 10:31:37 · answer #5 · answered by ROSE A 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I really feel for you. I had an abortion 5 years ago and it was touch and go whether I went ahead with it or not. My bf at the time was horrible and didnt want to know me so I thought the best option at the time was to go through with it. I did feel guilty for a few years afterwards but time will heal I promise. Im with a new man now and so much happier and am preg again. God wouldnt have wanted to punish you. Im a firm believer that the things we do happen for a reason.
2007-06-26 10:01:49 · answer #6 · answered by Lorraine A 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
speaking from experience I really do know what u are going through and I have tortured myself for 5 years over it , as I don't think I made the right decision at the time and have regretted it ever since. ...my heart really does go out to u as I saw what u saw and it was the most terrifying gut wrenching thing I have ever done and seen .
as for thinking it gods way ect I feel this too that I am being punished as I am now been in a relationship of 5 years and we are now trying for a baby and for 6 months it still isn't happening I just wonder if this is my punishment.
all my love to u sweet heart xxx
2007-06-28 02:47:48 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
There can be healing after abortion, but the issue needs to be dealt with--not just ignored because "you shouldn't feel this way." God can forgive anyone; they just have to ask for and accept it.
Some people refuse and find other ways to try to drown their problems. Unfortunately, women who have abortions are five times more likely to abuse drugs or alcohol and to commit suicide in the year following their abortion. Please get help.
Listed below are some organizations that can help. Many of their volunteers have had abortions themselves, struggled with their decisions, and now work to help other women recover from their abortions.
2007-06-27 17:16:28 · answer #8 · answered by Richard M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please don't feel guilty and don't let your belief in a higher being trap you into this guilt. It's just propaganda by the anti choice brigade.
Foetuses are not viable outside the womb until 28 weeks. You made the right decision for you. Don't let anyone say otherwise!
There's a better website someone posted a few days ago; I'm not sorry.org I think. Will get back to you on that one. Have a hug on me. *hug*
2007-06-26 18:59:20 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How far into your pregnancy were you? Surely they should not have let you home if the foetus was at a stage which actually resembled a baby or were you still in hospital? It must have been terrible. It is not a decision which is taken lightly and im sure you had genuine reason. You dont need to be made to feel any worse at a vulnerable time like this x
2007-06-26 09:44:26 · answer #10 · answered by Foxy Chick 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋