my son is 9 months when I put him down on the floor he crys, when I pick him up he stops. He hates to be on?

Question

his own, I let him cry for a while but sometimes he cries so much. I can't carry him around all day, I think he is so attached to me, I do not know what to do. Any suggestions

Answer 1

9 months is classic timing for phase one of separation anxiety. This is a really tough time for little ones because they're just figuring out that they're a separate entity from mommy and it's very stressful! This phase lasts anywhere from 1 week to 1 month, usually and it is over a lot faster if you soothe them and help them through it. If they are ignored at this tumultuous time it can make it last loooonger. No one wants that, right? ;)

When we went through this phase I did sling my daughter a lot so that she got the contact she needed, but she wasn't the center of attention. In other words, I went about my business cooking, cleaning, shopping, typing, talking on the phone, whatever. Within a week, she was over it and content again to play on her own. She went through it again 4 months later when she learned to walk (typically phase two of separation anxiety) and basically the same thing...this time I gave her a lot of time and attention and hugs and cuddling for about a week and then she was once again content to toddle around the house chasing the cat.

Also, it's totally cool to leave baby with a loved caregiver to help them get used to being with someone else who loves them. What we did was stay for a half an hour for a transition, then we left while baby was having fun with grandma. Even if it's just so you can go out and have a cup of coffee without a little one attached to you, a break is very important!

Don't worry, it does pass! Good luck and do what feels right to you.

Answer 2

Sounds to me like he's got you trained! At 9 months old, children can develop separation anxiety, and some of them get it worse than others... and they can be very manipulative little critters! Both my kids were.

If this is really bothering you, try setting him on the floor while you are able to sit down nearby and be patient. After a while, he will crawl (or walk?) off. Give him a few minutes to get interested in something else, and then get up. Don't leave the room, just putter around. Clean, talk on the phone, whatever. Just stay nearby so he can watch. If he starts crying, sit back down until he loses interest in you again. Repeat. Pretty soon you'll be able to leave the room for a few minutes without him worrying about where you are. If you know you're going to be gone for a long time, take him with you and put him on the floor where you will be. He will get used to you being around without being held.

If the crying is nonstop and persists for no reason, make sure he doesn't have an ear infection or reflux. My daughter went through a phase where she seemed to be "allergic to the floor" and it was because she had an ear infection in both ears.

Good luck!

Answer 3

I know it sounds harsh, but you need to put him down and let him understand that he's OK even if you're not holding him. When I put my baby to bed, sometimes she's OK and sometimes she cries. I go and pick her up/ she stops crying. So I comfort her for a second and then put her back down. Give her about 15 minutes if she starts crying again and then go back and do it again. Eventually she got the point that it's OK to be away from me without being upset.

Give him some toys to distract him, put him down in a place where he can see you and then let him play. He'll get used to it - it may take a week of this "tough love", but there's a big payoff when he doesn't have to be carried all over the place!

Hope this helps!

Answer 4

A sling!!

It works this way: the MORE he is attached to you, the MORE he will be happy to be down by himself. So if you give him the message that you are there when he needs you (yes, by carrying him all the time if that is what he needs!) then he will not need it so much. He is asking you for affirmation that you will meet his needs. Attachment is good - it means your baby is secure in the knowledge that you love him.

And don't listen to all the answers you will get about letting him cry it out - "eventually he'll learn". It is so sad that people think their babies are little terrorists to be wrestled with. At least your baby is a bit older - the number of people who ask this same question about babies barely out of the womb!!!

My house is full of various bits of material I use to tie my son to me so I can do other things. He is almost 2! Most of the time of course he is down doing other things - he is soooo active - but they are great for those clingy times, which mostly seem to happen when you need both hands! Go to babywearer.com for ideas, but really all you need is a wide piece of material long enough to tie around you. It is not "rocket science" (i hate that expression, but you know what I mean!) - I put him on my back today using an ordinary baby blanket, as it was the closest thing to hand. It worked great.

Answer 5

Try sitting with him for a few minutes at a time in the floor. Make sure he has toys or maybe some baby music on. He probably gets scared if you leave the room. So just try to do this more often till he gets use to playing on his own.

Answer 6

Ease him into being on his own step by step. It will take a few weeks, but it's worth your while.
Step 1: get on the floor with him and play
Step 2: get on the floor with him, get a game started and then sit close by, on the sofa for example and talk to him
Step 3: same as above, but increase your distance and the time he is by himself on the floor gradually.

Sometimes it helps to put some music on or have another baby over for a "playdate" next to him

Answer 7

NO! a sling is NOT a good idea. You want to break him of the habit, not condone it! If you find an alternative method (i.e. a sling) he'll just get used to that and how long can you keep THAT up?

It seems as though hes going through a really "clingy" phase. If I were you, I would try to go out more and leave hm with a sitter. Just go somewhere for half hour intervals at first to get him used to mommy being gone, but coming back shortly. He needs to understand that when you leave, it's not forever. It's okay that he cries (and he will), it's all part of the process. It's actually harder on you, however, than it is for him. Good luck and be strong!

Answer 8

I hear you loud and sparkling. I went theory the comparable ingredient with my daughter!!!! i got here across that when she ate and that i positioned down the the crying grow to be extra beneficial than i could desire to deal with....yet then i got here across that her nap time grow to be an remarkable time to take a bathtub and/or wash my automobile water my backyard. take a seat out on the front steps and communicate on the telephone. The bathe grow to be the final...I felt like if there grow to be something to undesirable got here approximately i grow to be top there. quickly she found out that she grow to be unlikely to die and she or he grow to be good for a robust 2 hour nap. The extra that she cried the longer she slept. i think of it taught her that she could desire to sooth her self to sleep. i've got faith for you. in simple terms keep in mind this is basically a piece. she will have the potential to stay.

Answer 9

My nephew does that just hold him for a little bit and then when you put him down give him something he likes like a drink or graduates food if he eats those yet or my nephew likes the hairbrush.

Answer 10

yeah i had to wear my son around for a while too, i have a nice sling that helped. they go through a period where they want to be held. it's perfectly fine, babies need all the love that they can be given. when they start crawling and getting around on their own they seem to be fine on their own for a while.