I am soon to be divorced after over 5yrs of separation. The wait in between was based in finances. I have a new woman in my life and looking very much like a second marriage is in my future.
I have mixed feelings however what I should do with my wedding ring from my first marriage. It feels like it would be such a slap in the face, and with children from my first marriage...it feels like it would be disrespecting them and the union that created them to just throw it away. At the same time I don't want my new wife to feel I am holding on to my ex as if she is still my wife in some strange way...any suggestions, please help.
2007-06-26 04:41:54 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Why not put it in a safety deposit box, and then when your oldest turns 18, give it to him/her. I wouldn't keep it in your home, especially if you share a home with the new woman in your life. But I think it's perfectly natural for you to have some sentimental value attached to the ring. It's part of your past, and, as you said, it's a symbol of the union that created your kids. I think if you explain this to your new potential wife-to-be, she'll understand. Anyone who cares about your feelings and who you are (and your past is a part of who you are) will understand.
Good luck!
2007-06-26 04:46:31 · answer #1 · answered by Courtney 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Put the ring away for your kids. Someday it would be nice for them to know that the union that created them did mean something to you even if it did not work out. Your new wife should understand, as long as she does not find you curled into a fetal position sobbing over the ring, that may bring up a few concerns on her part. Just kidding! Best of luck in your new relationship.
2007-06-26 11:49:25 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I applaud you for placing the respect you do on your former marriage. I do think you need to not wear the old wedding ring ever again and maybe place it in safe keeping to give to one of your children later on. Your children will know that they were conceived from a loving marriage by your words, not by a ring that if you continue to wear will be a bad reminder for your new wife.
2007-06-26 11:48:06 · answer #3 · answered by Lise-Anne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My wife's ring from her first marriage never bothered me, because I was busy living in the present. What was in her past has never bothered me. None of it. She kept hers because it was a part of her history, and to her it represented good memories as well as reminders of what can go wrong in a marriage. There is nothing threatening about that, and I don't see any reason why your second wife should feel threatened by a piece of metal.
2007-06-26 11:52:48 · answer #4 · answered by bg4gb 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The ring symbolizes the commitment you made to each other. There is no commitment anymore. Don't lie to yourself about not wanting to disrespect your children as reason to hold on to it. That ring does not symbolize your love or commitment for them. Pawn it; what's the problem? You have a new one anyway.
2007-06-26 11:48:43 · answer #5 · answered by ron-D 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Id put the ring away for your kids. They can have it in the future.
2007-06-26 12:58:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask your children if any of them would like it. It may hold a lot of meaning for them.
2007-06-26 11:46:58 · answer #7 · answered by proud grandma 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why dont you put the ring in a safe place in a box somewhere where it is not in place where you look at it all the time and whatnot, if your new gf is understanding, she will know why you kept it.
2007-06-26 11:45:52 · answer #8 · answered by jelly_bean_19_69 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your soon to be wife.. Let her know what you think and feel.. Let her know just what you said to us here...
Keep it in a nice safe place.
2007-06-26 11:48:07 · answer #9 · answered by movu101779 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
put the ring away for your children
2007-06-26 11:45:05 · answer #10 · answered by bronzebabekentucky 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋