arrange marriage or love marriage - which is better ?

Question

todays young crowd including me want to marry of our beloved one. But as per the local survey arrange marriage is more succesful than love one.i have trust on love but practical is different. r u agree or what u want to say

Answer 1

yes i m agree.
arrange marriage is better then love marriage.

Answer 2

I say love is better, because then if u don't like the person once u get to know them a bit, ur not pressured to work it out or stay with them, because there's no ceremony binding u together. Usually love marriages take longer to come about(u know ur partner longer), and therefore, eventually, they're gonna have to let their guard down a little more as they're comfortable, so then u'll know what u like, don't like, and can, and can't tolerate, and u can go from there. Plus, no ones' gonna interfere in ur marriage if it's social unacceptable.

In arrangement, since there usually isn't a whole lot of time before the nuptuals, people can/will hide who they really are until they're comfortable, and comfort takes a pretty long time, especially when ur talking to the one u might end up marrying one day. Then u've got realtives and god knows who else giving u well meaning advice...that ur not sure if u'll want or need, because everything's still sinking in, but ur married! Arrangement is not as fun as u'd think. The main reason that love marriages in India fail and arrangements work out is because u do haVe the family's blessing. IF they're a pain in ur side at wedding time, they can also be a big help when ur going through hardships, so more often than not, ur marriage will work, and withstand a lot of things. But in love marriages, couples usually have to go it alone, no matter what, and when faced with those odds, sometimes it seems easier to split. There are different pros and cons to both, so it really dpends on u. There are some arranged married couples that some who've fallen in love would envy, and vice versa. So it really depends on the couple. Love can grow out of arrangement, and fade in a love match, u can't really tell. It only seems love is better because u know the person, and are guided by feeling and u feel u belong already w/o a ring. U feel arrangement is better because either love comes from it, or u feel ur committed to that pesrson by religious decree, and don't want to be disgraced. U think arrangement is bad because u don't really know what ur getting into until it may be too late, and sometimes too many people are giving u advice on a person they're not married to. And sometimes u think love is bad because when the feeling fades, it's a hard crash, and then u might relize that there's really nothing to keep u guys together,and u can't find any common ground worth holding on to, so u split. Bottom line, which ever route u go, marriage is hard work, and the only opinions that matter are the ones of u and ur spouse, and how hard ur willing to make the committment work. In love ur just guided by ur heart, and that's not always good. In arrangement, ur usually guided by ur head, which isn't always good. A mixture of both is ideal. So in either case, a long courtship is recommended before marriage. It can be socially appropriate too, phone calls, group outings(with mixed gender friends, and a grown-up chaperone), u can even get supervised alone time(like the kind the guy and girl get when the guy comes to see the girl). That way it's socially approved, and u might like the person.

Answer 3

Both are the same.
Theres a saying you will never know a person until you live with her/him.

That is so true.

In a love marriage you have taken the decision and it is you and your partner to see to it that it works. The only plus point would be that you 2 alredy know each other quite well (so you think) and take things for granted.

In an arranged marriage your parents do all the talking finding out and decisions, and you believe and trust your parents and aceept the proposal and get married. That also is not a wrong thing, for all our parents always want the best for us.

Both arranged and love marriage is a gamble. You should act responsible and mature and when you find things not going right, nip it in the bud. Take your own decisions (that is with your spouse) dont listen to what the others around tell you.

The bottom line is if both of you can always be happy then what the hell.

In any marriage there is a lot of give and take, and believe me its not a bed of roses. Its upto you to make the bed of roses and enjoy life to the fullest with your partner.

Hope i have made myself clear .

Take care all the best in your life.

Answer 4

The facts will support both kinds of marriages. There are advantages to them and there are disadvantages. We in the West are programmed to only think of love between two people as the primary ingredient to a good marriage. Unfortunately things happen that may destroy the love and then the marriage falls apart. Arranged marriages are made for a variety of reasons not the least of which is a financial consideration. The mates are chosen by their parents who claim to have more experience and insight into who might be best for whom based on the errors they made in their own marriages. They don't always work out because their children aren't them. And with all the independence of people these days - being forced to make a life with someone who is a stranger isn't all that beneficial. There's no answer to the question you pose - it's up to the individuals themselves. If they want to have a hand and input at choosing the person they desire to make a life with and grow old with then they'll opt for Love marriage. But if they don't care who it is that they're with then they can leave it in the hands of others and hope for the best.

Answer 5

Success or failure of any marriage cannot be predicted. U should focus on making love marriage a success. Even after arranged marriage if things go wrong family/friends say it is ur luck and whatever help they do is along with humiliation only which is difficult to accept. U ve to be on ur own in all circumstances then why not marry the person u love. But be sure that u r alert and understand that u love the person, observe his small day-to-day habits which will be a eye-opener as to the real person ur lover is. u ve to live with his day-to-day habits mostly and if u can manage then go ahead.

Answer 6

I had a love marriage but the advise I give u might surprise u. I would say arranged marriage is better. I am happy in my marriage, we hv completed 10 yrs of our married life with lot of ups & downs. Whenever I hv a major problem, that is when I think "wish I had an arranged marriage", I could hv atleast confided my problems to my family. But with my marriage, I cannot tell anything to my family cause they r just gonna say 'We warned u this is gonna happen'. Then when it comes to in-laws, they r the worst ones. Since I'm of a different caste, they hv never accepted me, even after 10 yrs. So these r all the major problem one faces. I guess the girl is the one that gets affected too much.

Answer 7

I'm not sire whetherone is better than the other.
With an arranged marriage you usually dont know the other person very well and the marriage is based on duty. if you have been married to an unkind person these marriages can be hell. I suppose you start these marriages with low expectation and if love and respect grow (which it often does) this is a bonus.
With a love match a person starts out with high expectations and is sometimes blind to their partners faults. This can result in and disappointment and resentment. However if you marry the right person you have no regrets. However love marriages can be hell if you married the person without knowing them well enough first.

Answer 8

U r right. For a person who already has someone he/she loves & wants to get married to the same can do one thing. Send a marriage proposal to the beloved's family & convert the love to an arranged marriage instead of debating on love vs. arranged marriage. One wants marriage to make a family & not topic of debate.

Answer 9

There are advantages and drawbacks to both kinds of marriages.

I wouldn't say that "arranged" marriages are any better, per se, than "love" marriages. It just so happens that a great many cultures where marriages are traditionally arranged - also frown upon divorce.

So two people can be terribly mis-matched - and yet stay together in a loveless, cold, dungeon of an arranged marriage - because they have to for the sake of society.

That's why there are mistresses and consorts.

Answer 10

Arranged marriage had more success than the love marriage. In love marriage both of them should be free from ego otherwise some problem will arise where as in arranged marriage the elders will take care of the couple.

Answer 11

I'm for the love marriage -- I prefer binding myself to someone I know well enough than to live miserable for the rest of my life in an arranged marriage with someone I didn't want to be with in the first place.