Wife and I have been married for 12 years with 3 kids. Sex had started to come mostly in the form of quickies and with a lack of passion. We have always been very open with each other and neither of us are the jealous type. A couple that we had been close friends with a few years back before they moved away and the wife and I rented a beach house in Florida for a week. The first night after the kids went to bed the conversation turned into a very open adult conversation. Nothing physical or even any open suggestions about the others spouse. When we went to bed my wife was on “fire”. She admitted that she thought Brad was hot and had had impure thoughts over the last few hours about him. We had the best sex we had in years. Funny thing was that the next morning Brad and I went on the “Donut” breakfast run he said that he and his wife had fantastic sex that night.
The week continued with plenty of talk, innuendos, and flirting but no physical boundaries crossed. The fact that during conversations we had all admitted that the others we found the others spouse attractive, the vacation atmosphere, and the general lack of clothing involved with the beach created a rejuvenating atmosphere for all of us in the sex department. The wife and I still use this experience 1 year later as fantasy material while having sex. Anyone else very experience something like this?
2007-06-26 04:01:00 · 14 answers · asked by Brian 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Did some of you who have answered thus far actually READ what Brian wrote? He mentioned at least twice that no physical boundaries were crossed, there was no mention of a partner swap openly or anything along those lines. Simply that his wife thought the friend was hot and had some "thoughts" about him.
All of a sudden most of you answerers have turned these people into swingers. Either condemning them for it or telling them to become "non participating" swingers. What the ????
Brian, my wife and I have been married for 15 years. We have three kids. We also have lots of couple friends married more or less than us. Several of these couples are very attractive and even hot!
On several occasions of hanging out with these friends, the conversation has turned adult as you mentioned. Talking about favorite positions, favorite places, new techniques, articles, books, etc. Most of the time this "talk" has set my wife and I on fire. On fire for each other.
On one specific occasion a few years back a late night turned into an overnight stay. And the conversation lasted about as long. Nothing happened between any of us until my wife and I got back to our bedroom. Let me tell you the hour drive home was unbearable with the kids in the back. We wanted each other so bad! Needless to say that over a three day period we had sex nearly 10 times. It was so incredibly awesome. Even to this day we talk about it and the spark returns.
We are in the same boat. Ignore that other stuff about being swingers etc. Sounds to me like you don't need that. Sounds to me like you are both just human and other humans create some sparks that you keep to yourself. Any therapist would applaud you for being able to NOT take it to a harmful level.
2007-06-26 04:47:16 · answer #1 · answered by JoelMacDad 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My ex wife liked to talk about swapping with a couple that we were very good friends with and it did make her very hot and we had some awesome sex during and following those conversations. The problem was that this former friend came to visit and I caught them having sex. They tried to play it off as just an extension of the talk we had between us as couples and tried to make me think it was all my fault for not stopping it. Like I said at the beginning, she is my ex and that is exactly why. It is fire you are playing with and unless you want to share your wife and your bed, then you need to put the brakes on it, because it will not be too long before the fantasy is not enough.
2007-06-26 04:13:10 · answer #2 · answered by Suthern R 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
It sounds like you're 1 step away from becoming swingers - couples who openly swap partners. Some couples find that lifestyle exciting and a way to spice up their own life. If that's something you can do without jealousy, then good for you.
I could never do that because I'm the jealous type.
2007-06-26 04:06:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Great...four adults that had fun and did not cross the line. It rarely happens this way. Continued exposure to anything "forbidden" may sometimes desensitize the appropriateness of abstaining. When interacting with this couple remember you are entering a danger zone and while there always be aware of the line that once crossed usually leads to pain for all the parties involved.
2007-06-26 04:23:26 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
The problem is, no one should force morality on anyone, if I were to answer this question I would be forced to condemn what you and your spouse and those others did, but If I did that, i would be as bad as the Taliban, so I wont do that, I will simply say this much;
I would be sad that a relationship I swore before my GOD to honor and cherish til death do us part, would tarnish so quickly and be distracted by ideals of the flesh after a mere 12 years, that if in my eye I would have to look to another woman to excite me that was not my wife, I would be ashamed, that my wife would have to look to the flesh of another man to excite her would hurt me, in a marriage not just the phyiscal laws of fidelity must be honored, but take captive even the thoughts, for thougts are more dangerous than a mere physical act of sex, if you can remember it, since 12 years ago seems to be sooo long ago for you, if you can remember who you were and what you were thinking when you looked in her eyes and said, I do, you will quickly remember it was a thought that bound you together, the thought of a love so special that only you and she would share it, now here you are, betraying that thought with the thought of two tired musty old things, the bodies of your friends,, that will wilt and wither in the dust storm of time, but true love , shall never dim... for it lives in our hearts and minds, not in our penis and behinds :)
take care and thanks for the question, I hope we both got something out of it....
2007-06-26 04:14:59 · answer #5 · answered by Daddy in a box :) 3 · 1⤊ 3⤋
Lol. Honey, i'm a working stripper. and that i do have a pole in my place of abode, I do pole tricks at artwork, yet i will inform you that being a rapid learner has no longer something to do with it. Plus you're making extra money doing floor artwork than pole artwork, given which you may simulate intercourse extra powerful on the floor than on a pole. i could propose S ingredient by utilising Sheila Kelley, in case you wanted although. yet be waiting to handle extra beneficial than in simple terms pole tricks, in case you initiate working at a club you handle drama, bruises, sprained ankles - I went to artwork the day gone by with the two my ankles sprained, and grimy adult adult males. Plus the existence-type is annoying to get out of as quickly as you get into it.
2016-10-03 04:07:22 · answer #6 · answered by Erika 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have not personally experienced anything like that but I feel that anything that goes on between consenting adults is fair game so long as there is no sneaking around and cheating involved.
2007-06-26 04:09:51 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
My wife was the same way with Kevin Costner movies, then Brad Pitt, then Vigo. I don't see a problem with it.
2007-06-26 04:50:34 · answer #8 · answered by snack_daddy10 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I haven't, but if it works for you and your wife and you are happy and "on fire" for each other.............keep it up.
Fantasies are NEEDED after 12 years of marriage!
Enjoy each other.
2007-06-26 04:06:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Swingers huh? Well your wife is doing Brad in her mind and not you when she is on fire. If thats ok with you then enjoy it.
2007-06-26 04:05:08 · answer #10 · answered by Maria 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋