Be more attentive to people even at work? and please don't say shut up because I alway listen to the person but somehow i get the message screwed up!
2007-06-25 20:04:31 · 12 answers · asked by from_me_to_you 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
YOU APPEAR TO BE LISTENING; BUT YOUR MIND IS WONDERING. THAT IS WHY THE MESSAGE IS SCREWED UP.
Practice listening and repeating TV commercials, overheard conversations in the public and repeating things you just read.
These things helped me when I had a lot of pressure on me and could not focus on what people were saying to me.
Also, ''feel'' what they are saying. Put yourself in their place for the moment. GOOD LUCK
2007-06-25 20:25:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Here's a tip.
When someone else is talking to you...don't be thinking about what your response is. Many people are not listening and just looking for an opportunity to say something. Stop thinking about what you will say and just listen to what is being said. When they finish what they are saying...take a second...decide if you have something to say and then say it. If you really don't have a response...then don't give one. don't fear silence...conversations are about filling up silence...they are about listening and responding. If you are working hard to fill up all silence, then you aren't listening.
Also, don't look for hidden meanings in what people are saying. It's best to just take people literally. They will let you know if you aren't understanding what they are trying to say and they may need to rephrase, but at least you are listening to the exact meaning of their words.
Do you often find that you interupt people when they are talking? This is also a sign of a poor listener.
2007-06-26 03:25:56 · answer #2 · answered by ∞ sky3000 ∞ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
To be a good listener, I repeat what I think the other person is saying so I am sure I am getting the right message...for example, when my boss tells me to write a letter, send the mail, return his wife's call etc., I will repeat it for him to make sure that is exactly what he wants...with my husband it is a little different...it's supposed to be empathic...like when my husband starts to complain about how the house is dirty and he is frustrated with me, I have to try (AND I MEAN TRY) to not defend myself, not excuse myself or appologize, but agree with him!!!!! We have been going to counseling, and we have been trying to do this with each other...It's hard not to get defensive, but it ends up in such a way that the other person feels heard and understood...though its not always easy...
2007-06-26 03:19:12 · answer #3 · answered by joy72202 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you listen don't just hear the tone of their voice. Don't just look at body language, and definelty don't let yourself be distracted by your surroundings or other thoughts that might pop into your head.
best thing to do is making "listening sounds" so that they know you're listening, and ALWAYS ASK Q's. If you want to be perfectly sure that you understand what they're saying say, "what you are saying is......." and so forth.
hope this helps:)
2007-06-26 03:14:23 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Often when people don't listen well, it's because they're focusing too much on what they're going to say next, when it's their "turn" to talk. Try concentrating harder on what the person is saying, and them when it's your turn to talk, say, "Okay, you mean...." then summarize what they've just said. That really makes people see you're listening and you've understood.
2007-06-26 03:21:29 · answer #5 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not sure what you really mean but if you listened to people when they talk, I guess you can share your personal experiences with them too. But if they did not ask you for advise, I guess you just have to stay quiet and listen!
2007-06-26 03:11:18 · answer #6 · answered by happy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen carefully to what they're saying. If you don't understand ask again till it's clear in your mind. Repeat it back to them so there is no misunderstanding and then you won't screw it up.
2007-06-26 03:10:51 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to listen to what they are actually saying. If you dont know what theyre talking about, ask questions about the thing that theyre talking about. Try to see it how they are seeing it. Be open-minded.
2007-06-26 14:43:40 · answer #8 · answered by Tweetalette 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to listen attentively,and be enterested of what they are saying. And if you did not understand ,ask question. I hope this help. And please don't tell a person how to answer your question,it is a classless.
2007-06-26 04:32:26 · answer #9 · answered by Vannili 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen for awhile then repeat back to them what you believe they were saying to you, this way you can be sure you understood them correctly.
2007-06-26 03:10:51 · answer #10 · answered by az_mommma 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋