Wife and kids or Mom? Who would you choose?

Question

If given an ultimatum...who would you choose?
Your wife...who you began a life-which includes your child(ren), a woman you trust your life with, make love to, enjoy days with & can kiss and hold hands with anytime day or night, see your child(ren) anytime with no hassle or visitation schedules, all who love you unconditionally----OR
Your mother, who gave you life, who helps you when you need help, who is probably the only woman you can trust, who will never let you down, and will always be there for you and loves you unconditionally?

Answer 1

Your wife and kids. Your mom was there to pass on her protection and love to her children and now it's your turn. It is very unfair to not be able to trust your wife or put her second. when you get married, that is the one person you need to put first after your children.

Answer 2

Why? Are you having problems with a mother-in-law? A person doesn't have to choose between one or the other, But mom needs to know that you are a grown man, and now a father. And as such, your first priorities are to them, not to her. Moms really hate to let go of their sons, and about no woman is good enough for her son...ask her!

Grow some balls and let her know that you love her, and that you will be there for her, but your wife and your children are now your main objective. If she had her head on straight, she'd understand that as a successful parent, she wished that you would be a successful father and husband, and that means, she is now second fiddle. She's still in the orchestra, she's just no longer first chair..

Answer 3

Wow, talk about no brainer. You made a commitment to your wife, not your mother. Besides, wasn't it your mother that taught you to love your wife by her example. I know what you're going through, and for me the answer was plain and simple. My wife and kids come before anyone else. And I won't tell you it's easy, cause this might upset some of your family, including you mother, but if she is a good mother than she'll understand that you are doing what's right and if her love is TRUELY unconditional as you said, then she'll get over it. If not, then you have your answer. Good luck.

Answer 4

As a mom of 3 grown kids I can tell you, it is time for your mom to let go of you. I understand all of the good things she has done for you but she's done them cause she's your mom! That's what mom's do! She is taking advantage of the situation and your wife has every reason to get cranky and tired of your mom, especially since she's lazy and dirty.
Yes, your mom gave you life. But every mothers goal should be to see her child live and be responsible, productive citizens. She didn't have you so you could take care of her in her old age did she?
As I said, I am a mother and a very loving and involved mother and I'm tell you, your mom is taking advantage of you. Your wife deserves her own home and shouldn't have to be cleaning up after your unappreciative mother. If your mother is to be a part of your family, she must be a CONTRIBUTING part of the family, as your wife is and as you are.
Help your mom out financially if you can, but your wife deserves to the the master of her own domain.

Answer 5

Once you turn 18 or so and become an adult your mother's role in your life becomes less significant. When you marry and have kids, your wife and kids become your first responsibility and deserve your greatest loyalty. Your mother's job was done, or was it? If your mother is doing anything to negatively affect your marriage, you should tell her where to go! If you can't stick up for your wife and kids, then you're definitely not a man and should go back home to mama!

Answer 6

When you took your marriage vows, you & your wife became one. You left your parents home to start a life w/ your wife & now your children. Leaving your family for your mother is wrong. If your mother is giving you this ultimatium , she is using guilt & that is wrong. If your wife is giving you this ultimatium its wrong as well. You must remember your vows & the decision you made to marry & start a life of your own. Stand up to both women & let them know they are both an important part of your life; Let mom know she has a special place in your heart b/c of giving you life but you are a grown man who has a wife & family & they come first.

Answer 7

Your a man, you now have the responsibilites of a husband. This outweighs giving it up for mum, Also mum needs to respect this and never hand that ultimatium down. You have your own family and in no way should you take out your mothers cotten baby habits on your family. Stick with your wife and kids. If mum wants you that bad, offer her a spare room in your house (with your wifes permission first, as it is her house)

Answer 8

Why would your wife ever put you in that position to choose? You should never be made to be put in the middle and make a choice like that. If your wife doesn't want your mother in her life then that is her choice but you should be able to visit with your mother and she should still be allowed to visit with her grandchildren. Children should never be used as a pawn for any reason. If the children are in danger with their grandparents then your wife has every right to not allow them visitation. If grandmother is safe and loves her grandchildren your kids have a right to love her to. Here is a little story for you.............My nephew was married to a woman for many years she was very controlling. She made him choose between her and his mother. My sister was a very good person and she had a job where she could not attend one of her grandchildrens birthday party. The war was on for many years over that alone! My nephew loved his two children very much and because his wife threatened to divorce him and take away his children he gave up his mother and entire family. He did not see anyone not even his mom and she often tried many times but the daughter in-law was the devil from hell! Ten years later she finally got a telephone call about her son. It came from the police department letting my sister know that they found my nephew dead. His wife was having an affair with a man from her work.......he drank a bottle of whiskey (he never drank) and bought a shotgun at a walmart store......He parked his car in front of her place of employment late at night when the offices were closed and drank the whole bottle of whiskey and aimed the shotgun at his heart and killed himself! In the end he did not have the courage to turn to his mother because after ten years of abandoning her for his wife he felt he didn't deserve her. We found out that he was on medication and seeing a phsychatrist for six weeks leading up to his suicide. What a selfish act that left his children devastated for years. He gave up everything even his own life over a woman that he allowed to take everything away from him! They think the medication lead to his deeper depression. My sister stressed out over this for years and one day had a heart attack and they buried her near to her son. Your wife would have to have good reason for you making this decision. Every story is different and you have to weigh everything out! If you love your mother then you love her....but don't hold it over your wife if her reasons are justifiable. Separate them both and love them both and don't let either one of them use you against each other. Know what you can live with and what you can't. The mother and the wife have to work out their differences and not put you in the middle because you love them both. You know the what the real problems are and only you know what is best for all concerned. Just don't let anyone use you in the war or put that power over emotions. If your wife loves you she needs to understand your feelings and not put any guilt over the feelings you have over your mother. Your wife can choose to never talk to her or ever see her again but she should never stop you from having a relationship with your own mother. Unless she is willing to give up her own entirely to. Best wishes and good luck.

Answer 9

I would hope that you'd pick your wife and children. Don't be a momma's boy. Any good mother would want her son to be happy and move on and live his life. If not, she's got issues. Be a man and make the right choice.

Answer 10

it may desire to be that they have got not got the comparable ideals as thier mothers or aunts. We appreciate our mothers and aunts yet we are no longer marrying them. at times they want to place an apron us and handle us like little slave boys. it shouldn't take place. courting, romance, and marriage are thrilling situations interior the lives of the two adult males and females human beings. adult adult males envision a woman as his intercourse merchandise. woman envision thier guy as their Knight in Shining Armour. Neither of those are incorrect. besides the indisputable fact that whilst certainty contraptions in there must be a meshing of the minds and an outstanding form of negotiation. the marriage vows could continuously be remembered: "for extra powerful or for worse, in affliction and in well being, for richer or for poorer" . this could be a mutual determination made by utilising the marrying companions and not by utilising mothers or aunts or every physique else.