Help with new answering machine message, please?

Question

Here's my script, what changes should I make?

"Hello, you have reached Hot Coco Puff. She is not available to take your call right now. Please listen to the options menu to leave a message.

If you have an ussaa, press 1.
If you have a mushkilley, press 2.
Para Espagñol, marka 3.
Ou en francais, si vous preferez, marquez 4.
For all other m’seebays, please press 5.

BEEEP!”

G Bone, hill en teeznah, I bailed your *** out of jail! Show some respect. You'd better recognize, G!

Answer 1

LOL

I don't know why, but i remember this now.. I read it somewhere: girls are like cellphones, we like to be held, talked too but if u press the wrong button and you'll be disconnected.

Answer 2

hello this is the fridge. the answer machine is on strike so if you leave a message with me I'll stick it to myself and someone will get back to you. (pause) oh yeah "beeep"

Answer 3

well i dont think u will be getting any mes,they will reach 3 and hang up,so u'd better make it
1-if u have anything usefull to say,khteser
2-if u dont get the hell out of here
beep

Answer 4

what if i have 2 ussaas (ostein)

u should have a cycle
e.g. press 6 if u want to go through the directions again.


cool.............

Answer 5

if this is the parole officer, press 6

Answer 6

cool message
I especially love the BEEEP!!!!

Answer 7

6. If you are trying to sell something , @%$# off !

Answer 8

keep it short and sweet good luck