We went to my in laws last night with our 6 week old son, my mother in law had food poisoning and was throwing up and had diahrrea. Even though she was not professionally diagnosed as having food poisoning I began to grow concerned about the health of my baby. I had a panick attack and left without saying goodbye. Now her feelings are hurt and I don't know how to make her understand. Side note: I had 4 previous miscarriages and was only 4 months along when I was put on bedrest and got sick with everything so I am hypersensitive and protective of my newborn around people who are ill or feeling bad.
2007-06-25 08:42:37 · 15 answers · asked by Julie J 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
honesty is the best policy and i think your mother in law would be over protective waiting for that grandchild for a long time. Be honest tell her you freaked and didn't know how to react and your sorry.
2007-06-25 08:46:50 · answer #1 · answered by momof3_angles 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First I hope your mother-in-law is feeling better. Now for the situation. It is alright for a mother to be protective of her children. I was always being careful with my 2 and now with my 6 grandkids, I am over protective, such as going way under the speed limit with my grandkids in the car and they are screeming, go faster, go faster. That is when I explain why I am doing with precaution. Now, I do not believe your baby will catch what your mother-in-law had because your babies food is not the same as the one you all ate, but the germs are there in the air and eviroment, so leaving was alright, but you could have first asked if she needed anything then if she said no, then leave and say good by and tell her to call you to see how she is doing. Then, if now she says anything about you leaving and no good bys, then tell her that since you had previous miscarriages and all the rest and extra care needed to give birth to you new baby, you felt that you had to leave for your son, but you tell her that you are worried of her health. I had a similar case with the 9 year old neice of my ex who was realy sick with fever, vomiting and diahrrea. I went to see and my ex came with our son only 7 months old at the time. I said to him you stay and I will take the baby and leave. I did not say good by, but hoped that she would get better. So do not feel bad, but let her know your reason and be gentle.
2007-06-25 08:56:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
When it comes to the health of your baby, you are excused from considering others' feelings. Tell her you were upset by the throwing up, and had to leave. You could even tell her that you were afraid that you would throw up too. If I were you, I wouldn't have stayed there, either. I had food poisoning a little while ago, and it was not pretty. I did NOT invite anyone over. I know that it's not contagious, but it's extremely unpleasant!
Don't worry about her. I'm more concerned about the panic attack. Do you have them often?
2007-06-25 08:51:18 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I cannot believe she had the audacity to be offended ! She had no way of knowing for sure that it was food poisoning.Your baby is protected by natural antibodies from you for a certain amount of time after birth, but I would still not want my baby around a sick person. If it were viral and you caught it , who would take care of him ?She needs to grow up. As a new mom, you are supposed to be protective. I call it maternal instinct and don't blame you at all for being cautious. Just explain to her that you do not want to take any chance of your newborn or you getting sick, esp. with something as serious as vomiting and diarrhea that was of unknown cause.This is your baby and you used your judgement which is what's best for your son.
2007-06-25 08:51:48 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all, with as many of miscarriages you had.... never take a chance on anything! for one if she did has food poising then that's every reason to be concerned! and if she didn't have that then she was sick and you shouldn't be around sick people. It sucks that your pretty much stuck around the house but why take a chance this is the baby you have been wanting and waiting for Good Luck
2007-06-25 10:12:50 · answer #5 · answered by Jenny S 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you know for sure that it was food poisoning, then the baby would have been fine around her because that's not something that you can catch, and then you owe her an apology. but, if you don't know that it was food poisoning for sure then i wouldn't want the baby close to her either. you should try talking to her and tell her that it was nothing personal, you just don't want to take chances at your baby getting sick and that you will come back over and see her when she is better.
2007-06-25 08:48:32 · answer #6 · answered by mrs garfield 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
let her know you are sorry, and you should not have left without saying good bys. But you can also let her know of your fear of the baby getting sick. If she was not dx'd by a dr. woth food poisoning, she may have had a stomach virus, which can be very bad in small children. Send her flowers and tell her you will bring the baby back over as soon as she is feeling up to it!
2007-06-25 08:47:27 · answer #7 · answered by parental unit 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Apologize, explain that you realized that you over reacted but you were concerned for the baby and you didn't mean to hurt her feelings, although if she's got food poisoning she's got bigger problems right now.
2007-06-25 09:49:01 · answer #8 · answered by Sandy Sandals 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok, maybe you overeactyed a little but you are concerned about your baby's health and so would I.....I think it is her who should understand...so what were you suposed to do staying there in such an awful environment?? She sounds like my "monster" in law, LOL. You just say why you left, you don't have to make her feel alright, if she's upset about it that's her problem. Don't worry about anything but your newborn.
2007-06-25 08:49:48 · answer #9 · answered by Baby Ruth habla español 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
she was once a new mother, just explain that even though you enjoy being around her and appreciate her help with your baby, having the child around any kind of sickness no matter who it is still freaks you out. as long as you let her know that it's not personal and make her feel loved and appreciated she's sure to understand and get over it.
2007-06-25 08:54:31 · answer #10 · answered by leggettkiana 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋