Would it upset you if your boyfriend/girlfriend insisted on prominently displaying gifts from former lovers?

Question

I mean, to the extent that you had to walk by and see it 50 times a day, and whenever you had company, they would show it off and tell the story of how they got it?

I don't to be hard to get along with, but I'm getting tired of this......not saying he shouldn't keep these things, but is it unfair of me to be upset by this constant reminder that she was so awesome and had such great taste in gifts? >: (

Answer 1

Your reaction seems perfectly normal to me. Keeping a rare or expensive gift from the past would not upset me, but the constant flaunting of it and telling everyone about it sounds just plain boorish. If he needs that kind of attention and validation at your expense, his self esteem must be lower than a snake's belly. Personally, I think you deserve better than that.

Answer 2

I would have to say this depends on what the gifts are. If they were practical, or such, then to keep them in the open is no problem, however if it is ornaments, cards, loveydovey stuff, then yes, it shouldnt be in the open...... either that or if it is ornamental, he doesnt have to tell the story of where he got it from every time.

Answer 3

It is a bit tacky yes. He should highlight the story and history of what the item is where it came from, why it is important to him and mention who he got it from as an afterthought. I'm a guy and i don't make a lot of money. Some of my wife's ex lovers were well to do and lavished her with expensive and exotic gifts. If she did to me what he does to you at the least I would be quite annoyed and at worst i would feel insecure and slighted.

Answer 4

Sweety, its only stuff. You have the guy that is the part that matters. Tell him the story telling hurts your feelings. If he doesn't stop that's a whole new ball of wax. Look at the stuff and remember she had good taste in stuff....but you have the relationship that she couldn't buy.

Answer 5

Have you expressed this to him? Sounds like he displays them like trophies of past conquests. The fact that he displays and brags in front of you - I find disrespectful - to you. What if the tables were turned and you conducted a tour of all of "your" past exploits? Love does not hide or deny the past - it is part of who you both are, but it celebrates the beloved to the exclusion of everyone else. If he knows it hurts you, why must he revel in it?

Answer 6

Yes

Answer 7

i think of this is because of the fact the guy has got here upon the form of affection they did with you, with somebody else. It form of makes you experience disillusioned once you spot them, and this is like the recent individual they're with is giving your former love what you have been lacking interior the courting. Like, what did I do incorrect? Is that individual a extra suitable lover than i'm? i think of jealousy is the effects of one's lack of self belief with themselves.

Answer 8

He's being very inconsiderate of your feelings. You have the power to let people treat you good or bad. Don't settle for bad. You don't have to be a b_ _ _ ch about it, but he's needs to know how it makes you feel. If he doesn't change, then you need to make the change---in boyfriends. He's a dud if he won't change. Good luck.

Answer 9

but baby, great sports memoriabilia has to be an exception here. Surely if you had a signed team photo of the Spurs from your ex, you would not hide that, right?

Answer 10

Absolutely! Gifts from ex-lovers, if they are kept at all... should be out of sight, just like the ex-lover should be!