When you give a friend advice and they don't listen?Or if you try to help someone overcome their lonliness but they insist on feeling sorry for themselves and saying such things as they just can't see an end to their lonliness?Would it make you mad if they wouldn't even try?Is it possible that they enjoy the attention it draws to them to behave in such a negative way?Would you continue to help them or just give up and let them dwell on their own misery?
2007-06-25 08:08:56 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
Be slow to give advise because " A wise man doesn't need it, and a fool won't heed it." So you end up talking to yourself.
I would continue to help, but be careful they don't pull you down with'em. Tough love I guess. Don't agree with them just to avoid conflict. Be strict and stern and brutally honest.
2007-06-25 08:47:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
I might get a little frustrated, but remember it's just your opinion which might be different from thiers. If they asked for the advice give it to them, but in the end it's there decision whether or not to use it. In some cases yes, you'll find that that person loves the attention that they're getting, and it's there little stupid game. When you know for sure that this is what they're doing, give the advice and leave it at that, because if you don't your bound to spend a lot of time being frustrated when you could be doing something more constructive with your life. Sometimes you just have to let people dwell in there misery, you've done just about all you can do, and if they don't take the advice to make things better for themselves then that's there choice, but eventually they'll come around. Well I hope that helps.
2007-06-25 15:18:26 · answer #2 · answered by chiquita linda 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Were you easvesdro......no you couldnt have heard me. Just dealt with this exact thing today. My friend is a lost cause, she has done the same thing since she was 18, she is 43 now! She gets off on being miserable. And when the horrible situations resolve themselves she creates new ones. It must be her lot in life. I find that so sad. I have had to get a little more distance between us. She is an energy sucker and I cannot afford to let her suck me dry any more. I will be her friend, but the days of doing anything for her are over. You have to establish boundaries.
2007-06-25 15:15:57 · answer #3 · answered by wwhrd 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Cant be angry at them. Things are going so bad or them they can only see the negatives. They need positive things in their life. Just telling them to "look up" wont do it. They need to feel the love. Take them out for a good time. Cheer them up. Gather some friends over and play some games. Pull them along, make them want to see and do things. It may take a while, but it can be done. Life is really really hard for many people right now.
2007-06-25 15:15:43 · answer #4 · answered by MrKnowItAll 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My daughter's been complaining of this for the last 6 months. She tries and gives advice to her friends, and then they don't take it and continue to complain about their situation. I told her to always do her best to help her friends. She just needs to try and not take on their misery. It's hard though, I know. People do enjoy the attention though, I think. Pretty sad, if you ask me.
2007-06-25 15:14:37 · answer #5 · answered by Sunshine 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
People are under no obligation to take the advice you give, even if it is the greatest piece of advice ever given. If you are getting mad because they choose not to listen to you then you had better prepare yourself for a lifetime of disappointment.
2007-06-25 15:13:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I give it my best shot until it is time to stop trying. If my friend only wants sympathy I listen and stop opining. I don't get mad, I start in with the 'I told you so' that usually makes them listen or drop me.
2007-06-25 15:19:06 · answer #7 · answered by Madam Naka 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
oh man, there is only so much that you can do. If they are unwilling to help themselves and just want to whine then just shut them down. Everytime they start to ***** just change the subject or tell them; you won't listen to me, you don't like what I have to say so just stop. Sometimes that is what it takes for people to grow up
2007-06-25 15:13:13 · answer #8 · answered by The Voice Of Reason 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I guess it would be up to the person offering the help, I'm sure they appreciate the advice, and sometimes I'm sure they're so confused their not sure what to believe, and just because they may ask about it, it doesn't mean that they're not beginning to believe. But I guess it would be up to you.
2007-06-25 17:04:15 · answer #9 · answered by Baxter 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think I would let them dwell on it a while, then see if they're ready for my help later...
Cause yeah, I find that rather annoying
2007-06-25 15:12:35 · answer #10 · answered by FireRed 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋