Can you write a mystery/horror/comedy paragraph or 2 or more that includes these random phrases?

Question

1. In the highlands of Scotland.
2. I am NOT sleeping alone in that room.
3. A scream tried to make it's way out of my mouth....But I was eating haggis at the time.
4. Col. Mustard ,in the conservatory.
5. That man reminds me of a deranged bagpiper.
6. The murderer was one of the members of the dinner party....But which one? Which one?

Answer 1

"I am telling you, none of those strories about this mansion being haunted will ever faze him. That man was born (1)in the highlands of Scotland", declared Philip as they walked down the staircase.

"Well, first let's meet this famous (4)Col. Mustard, in the conservatory", responded Margherita. "He's notorious for always having some insight to the matters like this. Those images that I saw on the ceiling of my room, last night were no hallicunation. Oh, by the way, (2)I am NOT sleeping alone in that room, again". She gave him a questioning look and Philip responded, "Fine, I'll stay with you in the room, but you know that's a bad idea. As bad idea as it is to bring Col. Mustard in the middle of all this. (5)That man reminds me of a deranged bagpiper".

Margherita giggled and said, "Regardless of his somewhat unconventional methods and a little bit off-putting appearance, he is the only person with the qualifications to solve this mystery. Besides, his reputation is solid on this type of investigations.

When they entered the conservatory to greet Col. Mustard, they found him walking around the place with his hands in his back and muttering to himself, "(6)The murderer was one of the members of the dinner party...But which one? Which one?"

Margherita and Philip gave eachother a slightly worried look, before Philip, ever the diplomat, extended his hand to greet Col. Mustard with his signature smile.

Col. Mustard distractedly shook Philip's hand, he seemed to be calculating something as he turned to Margherita and asked,"About those images that you have reported to have seen in your room, Miss...Have you heard any sound at the time, or did you scream when you saw those moving images?"

Margherita gave him a sheepish smile and said,"(3)A scream tried to make it's way out of my mouth...But I was eating haggis at the time".

Philip groaned as Col. Mustard said, "Right". He cast his eyes heavenward as he wondered how in the name of Great Scott, this type of people always managed to find him. He took a deep breath to compose himself and said,"Alright, Let's take it from the beginning. Tell me everything you know about the unsolved murders that occurred in your great grandmother's house before you kids decided to move in here".

Margherita heard Philip gulp before he said, "There is something about our family that you need to know, Col. Mustard. Why don't you sit down first?"
TO BE CONTINUED

Answer 2

In the hills of Scotland I was in a mystery. With a former colleague of mine by the name of Col. Mustard. Even though he was a good man, that man reminds me of a deranged bag piper. It was a dinner party with some other colleagues of sorts.

"I am NOT sleeping alone in that room" I screamed. See, previous to this engagement there had been two murders in that very room that I was suggested sleeping in. But now was not the time for such pleasantries, it was time for dinner in the ever lovely conservatory.

It was a wondrous room filled with many curios and other sorts of relics. The haggis today was especially delicious until the lights went off. A scream tried to make its way out of my mouth... but I was eating haggis at that time.

After the lights had returned the butler was dead. No one heard the door open or close. The murderer was one of the members of the dinner party... but which one? Which one? A HA!

It was Col. Mustard in the conservatory. He held in his hand a rusty spoon, the same which he dug out the butlers tongue!

Answer 3

No, this one will take a better imagination than mine.