Can you write an amusing pargraph or 2 or more that includes these silly,random phrases of mine?

Question

1. Now THAT I want to see!
2. GREAT! A weekend with my in-laws.
3. Why can't you be normal?
4. Ten minutes! Ten lousy minutes!
5. No. You did NOT tell me we were going to a nudist camp.
6. When I opened the door, in walked ______ _______.

Answer 1

The catamaran was docked by the beach off Fiji, and I was enjoying a leisurely stroll beach-side as the early morning tide rolled in. I was waxing nostaligic about the girl I meet last night by the dockside bar thinking,"Ren, why can't you be normal and fall for some girl, stateside?" She had looked at me with those almond shaped eyes, and refering to the catamaran had exclaimed, "Now that I want to see!"
A pretty woman on a pretty boat was more than I could resist, so I decided to settle the tab and give her the tour, but when I opened the door, in walked Frank and Barbara Grossman my ex-in-laws! Ten minutes! Ten lousy minutes! and I would have been aboard and away conducting my private tour, but here they were.
"Ren, what a surprise to see you here" they exclaimed. "our Yacht is in dry storage for some repairs, and Cari (your ex) is back at Havard completing her medical degree after the divorce" Cari? a doctor? Now that I want to see! She had surgically removed half of my fortune during the divorce, so skills she had.
"Could you drop us off at Bora Bora? Come now, Ren, and be a dear, no hard fellings", said Barbara. I hesitated for a moment and gave my almond eyed beauty a rain check for the tour and then cast off to Bora Bora with Frank and Barbara. I'm a sucker for a hard luck story. "Great! a weekend with my ex- in-laws, I thought. We arrived early the next morning when to my horror they both stripped bare in front of me and laughed as they gestured me ashore, "Now Ren, don't be such a prude old man. You are single again, and surely we warned you this was a nude resort", Barbara giggled. "No. You did not tell me we were going to a nudist camp!" i yelled as I watched thier hind quarters disappear resort-side, bronzed by the morning sun and burned into my iris's like a parting insult to my Fiji memory.

Answer 2

Sam looked at herself in the mirror and her lips parted to form a smile. She had brushed her dark brown hair and they seem to fall neatly over her lean shoulders. Her cheeks were glowing after the blusher she applied made her flawless complexion even more radiant. She needed the final touch, a dab of the glossy pink lipstick and she would be perfect.
"Take your dirty hands off my things, you twerp!" Shrieked a familiar voice. It was her sister Jill. "But these aren't your things. They're mine," replied Sam. "Oh, is that so?" Jill continued to belittle her. "Yes, take a closer look. It says here, M-A-Y-B-E-L-L-I-N-E. This is yours L-O-R-E-A-L." She was right but Jill was in no mood to stop arguing. "Fine, but still, you're tresspassing. This is MY room. I don't fancy sissy boys like you in it! Why can't you be normal?"
Sam could take almost any insult from her sister but she hated most when Jill reminded her that she was not a 'real girl'. She stormed out of the room, with dreary eyes and revenge in mind.

Answer 3

Sally was bubbling with excitement that day. She and her husband were going on a ski trip to the Poconos in Pennsylvania for a week. She was busy packing the suitcases when she heard her hubby holler,"Guess what, honey? "(6)When I opened the door, in walked my most favorite brother in the whole wide world!", to which his brother Simon replied in a mock scolding voice,"I am your only brother in the whole wide world, Pat".

Unfazed, Patrick continued," Simon and Tina are going up to Ohio to visit my parents, what do you think, hon? Could we stop by on our way, spend a weekend with them, then continue to the Poconos? It will be fun!"

Sally walked into the living room to greet Simon and said, "(2)GREAT! A weekend with my in-laws. Can't wait".

Patrick grinned, "You know hon, when we were in college, I always used to plan these fun getaways, and once I took Simon, William, Harry and the rest of the gang to a nudist camp in South France. You should have seen the expression on Simon's face when we arrived there"

Sally smiled at Simon, "(1)Now THAT I want to see! Simon standing at the entrace of a nudist camp!".

"(5)No. You did NOT tell me we were going to a nudist camp, until we arrived there. One of your warped surprises, that's what it was", Simon retorted to Patrick.

He turned to Sally and said, "He tells us to get ready for turquoise waters of the French Riviera before we leave our hotel, then without any warning we end up at the entrance of a nudist camp. I had no time to mentally prepare myself for it".

Patrick laughed,"What is the big deal? We were in college, and any other brother would have loved to be suprised with a trip to a nudist camp. (3)Why can't you be normal? Besides, you met that gorgeous Hungarian chick there with whom you got to talk in the nude, so what are you even complaining about?"

Simon rolled her eyes and said to Sally who was watching their interaction in amusement," Yes, she was very beautiful, but she was there with her boyfriend, so, all we ever had were those few minutes." He shook his head as he remembered those few minutes that he thought he had died and gone to heaven. "(4)Ten minutes! Ten lousy minutes! That's all I got with that Wonder Woman. Then it was mostly some old guys walking around in the nude that you don't want to see in your worst nightmare".

Sally was laughing as she said,"You boys and your college adventures always crack me up". Then she turned around and said, "I gotta go finish packing, if you are hungry or thirsty,
please help yourself to anything in the fridge".

"Oh, no thanks, Sal. I have to get going, Tina is at home packing also, and she will give me grief later on if I don't help with the preparations now. We'll see you guys up at the ranch this weekend then", he said as he turned to leave.

"Looking forward to it", said Patrick, then casting a glance upstairs where Sally had gone to finish packing, he lowered his voice and said,"I'll tell you later about the surprises I have planned for her at the Poconos, it will be the vacation of her life".

"Poor Sal", Simon said as he chuckled and walked out. When he reached his car to leave, he looked back at his brother's house one more time. "Never a dull moment in the MCDoogle family", he thought to himself with a smile.
THE END