Im pregnant.Is it ok to kill my husband and blame it on my hormones?

Question

Im 9 weeks pregnant(1st baby) with major morning sickness. I cannot eat anything and I cringe at the smell or sight of food.Before I was pregnant I used to love spending most of my time in the kitchen preparing food for my hubby.
He tells me its ok, he understands but then he will put on this real puppy dog look and make a sandwich. He cant cook proper food and I end up feeling guilty then force myself to prepare something.This frustrates me and I know its my own fault as I spoilt him. We both work and its a battle for me to get to work and home everyday and when i do get home in one piece i honestly dont have the energy to still prepare something..How can I stop feeling guilty over something so petty or should I just kill him and blame my hormones?

*this is obviously a joke:-)

thanks for your answers in advance!

Answer 1

hmm sounds like he needs some cooking classes!! at least hes trying though, as I know a few men of my friends who wont even make a sandwich. This might sound harsh, but you have to try and pick your battles arguing over food just kinda sounds like a waste of energy to me, if he cant learn to cook then you might have to try and send him off to get takeaways or put a ready to cook meal in the microwave for you.

The morning sickness will pass and you will retrun to your former glory, when you are feeling better you should try and drag him in the kitchen to help you :)

Goodluck with everything! I hope the rest of the pregnancy goes well.

Answer 2

Lol haven't all pregnant women wondered the same thing? My hubby was a bit like this in the beginning, it is hard for them to sympathise when everything just looks the same to them. From the moment my bump appeared I noticed a change in my husband and it just gets better everyday, he cooks the majority of the time now as I am just too tired and he NEVER cooked before. I'm 32 weeks now so not long to go for me and I am soaking up all the special treatment as I know as soon as the baby comes out it will go back to me being the cook and the cleaner. I sympathise with you re the working, I work full time and I had no idea how hard it would be - all pregnant working women deserve a medal! Now listen very carefully when I tell you that you absolutely must not feel guilty, get over that right now, you are growing a baby and your feelings are not petty, pregnancy hormones are horrible and whatever you are feeling is not wrong. My hubby said he couldn't cook too - it's just an excuse, he will learn to cook if he has too. Now go and put your feet up ;-)

Answer 3

I completely understand where you're coming from...I had morning sickness so bad I lost 20 lbs. my first trimester and was down to 95 lbs! I was throwing up like 3-4 times a day. Just remember that the morning sickness is only temporary. Hopefully sooner than later you'll be back to yourself, so you can cook wonderful meals again and actually enjoy food. Just let your husband know how you feel, and that you're having a hard time wanting to please him, but you need to take care of yourself and the baby you're carrying first. He should understand if you keep communicating.

Also, maybe he needs a little practice doing some cooking, for AFTER you have the baby! Make him help you a little, or you'll really regret spoiling him after the baby arrives. I had my husband help with the part of cooking I couldn't do, like cooking meat. Try cooking together if you can. Good luck!

Answer 4

I had the exact same feeling when I was pregnant. My partner use to guilt trip me when I didn't make food but it got to the point where I couldn't bear to go into the kitchen. But what I did was stock up on ready meals and we had takeaway about 2 or 3 times a week, regret it now because I'm finding it hard to shift the weight but it was definatly worth it at the time.
In an ideal world the guy should look after the woman when shes pregnant by helping with the cooking, housework etc and making sure she doesn't do anything too stressful...but is there any guys out there like that? the answer no!

advice to you would be to ignore your husband when hes guilty tripping you, or do the same to him and guilt trip him saying that youre pregnant and if you cook HIM dinner and you end up throwing up HES taking essential food and nutrition from the baby and his baby's mother.

Answer 5

Unfortunately now you have broadcast you desire to kill him its now known to be premeditated and as such you wont get away with the hormone thing! Good answers about takeaway and heart attacks or starving to death.....worth a thought at least! Seriously though, if he thinks its hard now he's gonna have a big shock when the baby arrives, He will have to learn to cook either that or learn to grow breasts and lactate so you can cook supper! Your morning sickness should be gone by 3 months (often shorter sometime longer) take this opportunity to teach him. Also your local college probably runs a course or get Delia smith how to cook on DVD if its available. As a man who loves to eat good food I find it hard to understand a man who cannot cook, but there you have it. Tell him again how sick you feel and that if he wants to eat he will have to provide for himself, I know you've already told him but tell him again we men don't always get it the first, second or sometimes third time of telling also I found the book below quite helpful (and amusing)

Answer 6

Kill him...it's a blessing in disguise.

Maybe try cooking up an army supply of food and freeze it...then he can pull out different meals on his own and heat them up?

...also get an appliance or two that make it simple, like the Foreman grills, a rice steamer, and an electric griddle.

Then he can do eggs/bacon, rice/vegetables and meats easily and quickly by himself.

You can even keep the meats marinated in Lawry's marinade for him...also a crockpot for you.

Throw some vegetables, potatoes, meat and the like in before work and it's already done when you come home...get a slow cooker recipe book.

My sons are 13/14 and are able to utilize all of the appliances above, so I think a grown man should be able to manage.

...if not, kill him. LOL

or just let him starve, same results.

Answer 7

I'm of a certain age and my view is really that you should pack up going out to work for the next several years unless you can afford hired help because you have a full time job in your tummy.
But I guess you probably won't so stop feeling guilty. There is absolutely nothing wrong with sandwiches and if he gets bored with them, anyonecan cook if they can read. You should be more worried that you are feeding yourself properly. Tell your husband what you need and advise how he can prepare it for you. And don't forget sainsbury/M&S/Waitrose ready meals and the microwave.
Keep murder as an action of last resort. :-)

Answer 8

I had Morning Sickness for the first 3 months and a lot of other Mums to be reckon that if you can get over that hurdle - you'll be feeling a lot better, so not long to go.
A cup of tea before getting up together with dry biscuits helped me and some people swear by crystalised ginger and Sea Bands (sea-sickness bands).
I couldn't face the smell of anything fried throughout pregnancy so if husband wanted chips, egg and bacon, he had to do it himself (with all doors closed between the smell and me)
Buy in some microwave meals for him to prepare - hopefully he knows where the cooker is and how to turn it on.
Or get Wiltshire Farm Foods to deliver a box of ready-prepared dishes which can be heated in the microwave, then you won't even have to look at the food counters in your shops

Answer 9

You need to have a frank discussion with him, and tell him to stop being so selfish. It's not easy to work, when pregnant, and then have a husband, who thinks only of himself. Many husbands have the idea, that when they get home from work, that they can vegetate, while the woman, who has had to work at least eight hours herself, should continue to do everything herself, because he has the idea, that only he works hard.
It's time for men to get off their dead bottoms, and help too. marriage is a partnership, not a one sided deal, with the men getting all the perks, and the women getting shafted
The husband is then upset, when she's too tired for sex at bedtime, then has the gull to blame her, and says she's frigid. That's easy to say, after he's rested, had dinner cooked for him, while she cleans the house, probably takes care of other children too.
I'm afraid that I would tell him to stick it where the sun don't shine if my husband did that. amd I've been married over 42 years, and he's been pretty good at helping in the house. In that way, I'm pretty fortunate. That's one of the reasons our marriage has last so long. as well as a deep committment, being best friends, and being loyal to each other, as well as loving each other. Plus a fist full of Prozac in my hand. (just kidding).

Answer 10

Oh bless you! It's a thing all pregnant women suffer from. When I was pregnant, I had all day sickness. My husband worked from 6am-2pm and I'd always made his sandwiches for lunch until I tried to make his favourite, salmon & cucumber. My stomach lurched, I vomitted and nearly passed out so I gave him peanut butter in desperation. He didn't notice till lunch time and when he came home, he moaned as if I'd tried to poison him!!!! I told him if he wanted me to do his sandwiches in future, he could go without salmon, or do it himself! Thankfully, he realised I was suffering and helped me out. He also became a wonderful dad. Tell your husband, the new baby needs to come first, even before it's kicking and screaming. If he doesn't get that now, you are in for trouble when it is finally born. Good luck. Your priority right now is you and the baby, not hubby's stomach.