2007-06-24 18:26:51 · 19 answers · asked by Svetlana E 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Like others said, a simple and sincere, "I'm sorry for your loss" will suffice. Perhaps a small hug if you feel the need. However you did mention she was an acquaintance as opposed to a good friend. I wouldn't press for more anything more than a just a small statement. I would also stay away from comments like "It was meant to be" or "I'll pray for you", or "it was God's will". They are rude and insensitive to the woman suffering the loss. Also, if a woman is not particularly religious, she may get offended at the comment.
I think it was really nice of you to post such an etiquette question on this sensitive topic.
2007-06-24 18:50:12 · answer #1 · answered by Sharon F 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
"I'm sorry for your loss." Since she is an acquaintance and not a close friend, just those words is all that's necessary. Let her talk if she would like. If she opens up, listen closely. Comment only on what she says, like: "it's good that your mother was there for you." DO NOT make comments like, "the same thing happened to a close friend of mine and..... or "you'll be able to conceive again, soon." Though well meaning, they are not what someone who's just lost a baby wants to hear.
2007-06-24 18:38:01 · answer #2 · answered by susie79 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
be sensitive, a lot of women who miscarry feel the same sence of loss that a person feels when they lose a full term baby. Tell her you are sorry for her loss and you will be there for her if and when she needs to talk, the best thing you can do is just be there for her during her time of need. Ignoring the issue will not help because she can feel as though no one cares and she is going through her loss alone. Also try not to avoid the issue of pregnancy and children she will feel that you are holding back for her sake and it can be even more stressful for her because you are going out of your way to "make her feel better" or to "avoid the issue" remember she is still the same friend and treat her the way you would have treated her any other day.
2007-06-24 18:35:56 · answer #3 · answered by i_need_sum_sleep 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it comes up, just say "I'm so sorry". If it doesn't come up but you can tell that it's on the surface, you could say "I just wanted you to know that you've been in my thoughts lately and I'm so sorry for your loss."
I miscarried - and the sweetest thing that was ever done for me was a delivery of beautiful small white rosebuds. It absolutely made my heart feel a little better.
Unless you can really tell she doesn't want to talk about it, ignoring it can cause a lot MORE pain....It's like ignoring the elephant in the room.
2007-06-24 18:35:41 · answer #4 · answered by iam1funnychick 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have had a miscarriage and I know how she feels. If she doesn't say any thing to you about it don't say any thing about it. If you do feel the need to say something to her about it you should only tell her that your sorry for her loss and if she wants some one to talk to about it your there for her. Then let it end at that don't push her to talk to you about it. She may feel it's a personal issue for her and don't feel bad if she won't talk to you about it.
2007-06-24 18:39:25 · answer #5 · answered by Rochelle N 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when i had my miscarriage one of the best things someone said to me is, "im sorry for your loss, if you ever want to talk or need me i will always be here. just call" :) and also "I will be praying for you and your (unborn) children"
DO NOT SAY "its Gods way to remove something that was not right" or anything along those lines. i wanted to kill those people!!
Oh! and dont not mention it like its no big deal. it is a great deal to us. that was her baby regardless of if he or she was born.
2007-06-24 18:35:32 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The only persons I wanted to share my feelings with were my husband and my mother. I certainly did not want anyone to mention it, especially persons that were not close to me. I had a hard enough time containing my tears when in public, without someone bringing it up.
2007-06-24 18:46:31 · answer #7 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't say anything unless she brings the subject up. If she wants to talk about it let her vent and then tell her that you are sorry for her loss. But don't gush over her or initiate the convo.
2007-06-24 19:07:12 · answer #8 · answered by omorris1978 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can tell her you are sorry for her loss, and that the baby is for sure in Heaven. You might also want to consider asking her if there is anything you can do to help. Take care.
2007-06-24 18:38:57 · answer #9 · answered by SAK 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing...I know it sounds horrible-But I have been there and I would rather people not talk about it..If she wants to mention it then let her..But just listen to her..Dont tell her it happened for a reason or she can just have another one..Its so much deeper than that..So just lend an ear if she needs it..
2007-06-24 18:31:16 · answer #10 · answered by ♥♥ 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋