I am am grown and sexy woman. Married with three kids. When i was 18 i discovered i was bi. I didnt act on it for several years. by the time i did i was married with more kids. Now Me and my husband regularly have threesomes with other ladies and I'm extremly satisfied. But there have been some times I have wanted to call it quits in my marriage...but the problem is i can never see myself with another man. Am i all the way lez or does that mean i'll need time to heal? When i fanticise it always girl on girl. What u think?
2007-06-24 13:47:39 · 18 answers · asked by hunnihh 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
As people, we are all sexual beings. By extension, each of us has a sexual orientation: an enduring attraction — be it sexual, romantic, emotional or affectional — to another person. Sexual orientation, however, varies from one individual to the next and exists on a continuum that ranges from exclusive homosexuality to exclusive heterosexuality. Between these two poles, there exist various forms of bisexuality.
It?s unclear why some people are attracted to people of the same sex — also referred to as having "same-sex feelings" or a "same-sex orientation". It's thought sexual orientation is likely the result of complex interactions of a number of factors — cognitive, environmental, and biological.
Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior: sexual orientation refers to feelings and to self-concept. People may — or may not — express their sexual orientation in their behaviors.
So, these interactions of cognitive, environmental, and biological factors mean that sexual orientation is shaped at an early age?
In most people, yes, and their sexual orientation emerges in early adolescence. What's more, there's also considerable evidence to suggest that genetic and hormonal factors play a key role in shaping a person's sexuality.
People do not choose to be either gay or straight.
The bottom line
The origins of sexual orientation are very complex. There are likely many reasons for a person's sexual orientation. These reasons may be different for different people. Some people who identify as gay, lesbian, or bisexual say they have always felt attracted to members of the same sex while others claim they became aware of these feelings during adolescence or early adulthood
2007-06-24 13:58:20 · answer #1 · answered by TRACER ™ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When I fantasize or watch porn it is always girl on girl as well but I am not gay. I am a happily married straight woman, I think most straight women fantasize about girls more often then they will admit. This by itself does not make you gay. If you enjoy the threesomes because you like being with women than I would say you are bi. It was not a one or two time thing that you were just experimenting with, you like it and you do it regularly. The question is why do you want to call it quits? Is it stress or normal relationship problems or is it because you don't want to be with men anymore? If it is normal marital problems it may just be a phase that married couples go through, if you are not attracted to him or any other man anymore than you may want to explore that further. Good luck.
2007-06-24 20:54:50 · answer #2 · answered by PinUpGal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am exactly the same way. I think I have come to terms with the fact I am a lesbian. I have been with my boyfriend for 8 years, and couldnt imagine myself with another man. Men dont turn me on, and I fantasize about women. But I love my boyfriend. It is just a weird situation. Good look =/
2007-06-24 20:52:23 · answer #3 · answered by Kayla born 8/18/09 <3 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think life is to short do what makes you happy and dosent hurt anyone, to many labels these days get in the way. You might want to talk to someone a pro i mean. Good luck one more thing if you love your man and dont want to lose him then you have your answer.
2007-06-24 20:53:53 · answer #4 · answered by ynot_chas 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well fantasizing is never a bad thing and being open with other sexual experiences is not a bad thing either... but have a husband and kids and wanting to give that up kinda sound risky.... it is your choice.... but if i were you i would talk to my husband and tell him you are still up to threesomes and your probably just what they call curious... you just don't know what is going on in your head but think about it before you make any rash decisions
2007-06-24 20:54:02 · answer #5 · answered by Brandi 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps you should consider if what turns you on is being with a woman or if it is just the "Threesome" aspect of the relationship. If you find that you can only be sexually turned on by women then perhaps you are gay.
2007-06-24 21:14:52 · answer #6 · answered by Imndshadows 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it doesn't matter. Labels are often overused, and carry entirely too much importance. You are who you are. If you love a man, or love a woman, be with that person. Don't sit around trying to figure out what label you best fit under, just be yourself and live your life.
2007-06-24 20:51:24 · answer #7 · answered by raindreamer 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u want to be w/ a woman, than be with a woman, if u feel should leave your hubby, and if u feel its the right thing to do, then do it. your bi or lez if you are sexually, and personality wise attracted to girls. no sense in hiding thats jus crazy.
hope this helps somewhat. ;)
2007-06-24 20:54:08 · answer #8 · answered by a_ravers_party2011 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Am I reading correctly, that if you are in fact a "pure" lesbian, it would mean that you OUGHT to dump your marriage, without concern for the side-effects on your kids, or even your husband?
I'm all for being who you are, but compromise for the good of others can be . . . good!
2007-06-24 21:00:42 · answer #9 · answered by georgetslc 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No neither. According to the Gay community gay people just KNOW they are gay from a very young age, you didn't apparently.
Have a great one.
2007-06-24 20:54:00 · answer #10 · answered by ™Tootsie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋