Negative Criticism?

Question

I'm sort of a sensitive person, but sometimes I fear that people see that as a weakness. I don't know why, but recently I was looking up negative criticism for this type of personality because I thought it would give another opinion that I could consider. However, the more that I've been looking it up, the worse I've been feeling about myself. Whenever I go to read a book, or write something, I feel this is my sensitive side, and then I connect it to the hatred that some people show to this, and then I don't want to be who I am anymore. I'm confused right now, and I'm wondering if someone can help me get this negative critique out of my head. I thought looking up negative criticism would make me see that it's not that bad and I would get over it, but it just made it worse.

Answer 1

Have you heard about The Secret? I suggest you read the book or even better, listen to the audio book with the accompanying music. It explains the law of attraction. In it there is an explanation that tells us that when we think of something negative, we think of more negative things and feel worse and worse. The Secret is to change your thought patterns to change your life.

They say it'll transform lives. I think you'd get a lot out of it. Good luck and blessings :-D

Answer 2

*shrugs* Everyone's sensitive about SOMETHING, and it just so happens that there are people who are just a tad more sensitive than others. I like to call these people the anti-conservatives aka liberals (of which I am a part of ^-^). It's not a bad thing to be sensitive to things. Why feel bad about books and writing? Without these things, the masses would be mindless. The only ones who say that writing and books are dumb are the ones who are UNABLE to read and write correctly. Don't feel bad for being educated. I certainly don't. Besides, would you rather be cold and heartless or caring and sweet? Get over this negative criticism stuff... it was most likely written by a bunch of conservative idiots who have too many insecurities of their own and in turn lash out at the compassionate.

However, if you are OVERLY sensitive, that may be a problem, but I doubt that you're THAT PC, so no worries. The ones who are overly sensitive, in my estimation, are the ones who take offense to words like "hut" and "physically challenged" because they claim that such words may be hurtful to certain people (seriously, there are certain campuses that ban those words because they think that those words are un-PC or offensive). That is just PC to the extreme and a bit too much for me, so unless you're THAT sensitive, don't worry; you're fine.

Answer 3

There are many cultural and sociological reasons that you happen to feel less valuable in a Western society as a sensitive person, but since I doubt that you would like me to go into that, I will just give you direct suggestions.

Unfortunately, since you are a sensitive person, you probably find yourself puting too much thought into thoughtless words from others. I would suggest that you take into account the significance of what other people say before you let it affect you.

Stop looking-up negative criticism. You are what you eat...literally and verbally.

Often times people who are sensitive are more in-tune with other people's feelings, which is a real GIFT. People who lack sensitivity (like me, to be honest), will never be able to connect with others the way that you naturally can.

Try to focus on your positive aspects, not the negative ones. You are just as "good" a person as anyone else. If the self-negativity persists, try positive self-affirmations. Those have been helpful to me in my life. Good luck!

Answer 4

Give yourself a break! Yes, you're sensitive, and that's okay. Negative criticism hurts your feelings. That's okay, too. Where did you get the idea that people hate sensitive people? People are people are people. When we arrived, no one was better than the other. It's what we build into our character that defines us, and I would much rather be a kind, sensitive woman than an insensitive step-on-your toes aggressive person. You're lucky, not guilty.

Answer 5

Being sensitive is an advantage. You are more in touch with your raw emotions than an avarage Joe. All the truly creative artists, actors, musicians. poets etc. are very sensitive. It is a good thing. Feel proud of it. Brag about it. Seriously. You will see the change in your social life, which will change your attitude in approaching the subject.

Hope this helps.

Answer 6

all my life i've wished that people WOULD give me negative criticism so i could learn from it to move forward a better person...it would be very welcomed !!.......especially when i would be in a relationship that ended and never knew why.......if i had known what my "defect" was...if there was one...i would know what to do..or what not to do....i see it as a gift and that people care enough about you to invest the time in you.....try to accept it thankfully and consider it to be a very important part of your journey lucky one !

Answer 7

It's about finding that place where things aren't 'perfect' , but they never will be. An Idealistic way of rating and classifying things is the mark of an adolescent, who has not yet emotionally matured.

Keep trying.

Answer 8

I suffer from extreme sensitivity to criticism too. There are some things you can do to thicken your skin a little and boost your self-esteem.
The first is to accept yourself for who you are. You can't change who you are. You can always try to be a better person, but at some point in time you have to forgive yourself for not being perfect.
The second is to confront your strongest critics and ask them to accept you for being who you are. If they feel they must always correct you, change you, or fix you, they don't really love you! And you need to tell your critics this - they need to accept you for who you are, faults and all, or not at all. (I had to move 200 miles away from my older sister before I couldn't hear her any more - she still hasn't shut up, but by being 200 miles away I am not convenient for her to rant and rave at me anymore.)
You need to forgive your critics, and recognize that they are not perfect, and that they are in the end, just people! Sometimes their criticism really stings when you are trying to impress them or believe they are better than you. By realizing that they are only human, that they are NOT better than you (or worse people than you by only criticising and never complimenting), you knock them off their pedestals and bring them back down to your level. Once they are your equal you can defend yourself against their criticism better.
Don't become like them by passing on the criticism to everyone else. Become the one who compliments instead of criticizes. Have the courage to stand up and defend the target when the target is not you! By having the courage to speak up and defend someone who is not there to defend themself, you will gain more courage to defend yourself against the criticism when the target is you.
Take the high road and start ignoring your critics as much as possible. Stop giving them ammunition by reducing the amount of time you spend with them. Stop giving them ammunition by keeping your mouth shut and not saying stupid things just to shut them up. Stop giving them ammunition by learning how to do something successfully without them, by yourself, on your own, that has nothing to do with your critics, so that when you are around them, you know that not all of their criticisms are true. And if not all of their attacks are true, then maybe what they are criticizing about is not true. And if not all of their comments are true, then maybe they are false. And if they are false, then they are the only ones having the problem. And if they are the only ones having the problem, then that makes them pretty selfish, doesn't it?And why do things always have to be their way or not at all? Why can't I use a pump instead of blowing up the pool floatie by myself? Why can't I go the scenic route to my other sister's house instead of direct? What was so terrible about me being the only one in the family who tried to put out the fire started by the knocked-over candle? If she couldn't even bring herself to thank me for putting the fire out, I don't need to associate with her any more - sister or not.
By giving yourself some personal weapons and boosting your self-esteem, you may not completely silence your critics but you may be able to reduce the sting.
You also, at some point, need to tell your critics to just plain SHUT UP. If you never can do it right or make them happy, when are you ever going to make them happy? There comes a point where you have to stop living for them and that one word of thanks you will never receive, and start living for you. You are a better person than they are telling you. You don't deserve their bad treatment. You need to tell them if they can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all, and firmly change the subject whenever they start in their litany all over again. And leave the room.
Good Luck.