OK about 2-3 times a month my husband tells me he is going out. Won't tell me where he is going or who he is going with. I am pretty trusting but he never comes home till the next day! The first few times I just brushed it off. But now when he is getting ready to go I ask if he's going to be home tonight, he always says yes I'll be home in a couple hours. NO, NEXT DAY AT NOON! Why? What is he doing, he has a wife and 2 young children at home why? When he finaly gets home he always tells me he got drunk and slept on the couch at a friends house. What friend I don't know any friends that are not both of our friends. What should I do?
2007-06-23 17:00:52 · 19 answers · asked by momoftwo0110 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'm sorry to tell you this but this sounds exactly like my ex fiance. I found out later he was cheating part of the time. If he were a responsible adult, he would be spending time with his family. If he isn't cheating, he really needs to grow up! I didn't put up with it for long.
2007-06-23 17:07:06 · answer #1 · answered by amyaz_98 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the others that he probably is cheating and you need to check it out whatever way you can. But I would also do something else. After he leaves, I would pack up the kids, and not be there when he gets home. If you can take the kids to grandma's house, when you can leave them for a day or two. Then just don't be there when he gets home. After you see him get home, give it a little time, then go in and see how it feels to him to not have you or the kids there when he decides to show up. Then, whatever response you get, sit down and talk about it.....tell him how you feel about it and how he would like it if it were you doing him that way. (hence not having the kids around) Have a good backup plan and some cash built up in case you have to leave him at that point in time. If he is cheating, be sure to get yourself tested also.
2007-06-23 17:20:13 · answer #2 · answered by Kelly773 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my opinion it sounds as though he is cheating on you. The next time he goes out like this I would make sure that I had a friend there that I could trust to watch the kids, and I would follow him, take pictures and such to make sure. Or have a friend that you trust, follow him....you typically know which way he turns once he leaves the house, so the friend can sit and wait until he drives by and then get in behind him.....but not right on his bumper, far enough behind him to watch every move.
2007-06-23 17:08:33 · answer #3 · answered by mrs_endless 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's more than likely cheating on you..and spending his nights with another woman. If he were simply too drunk to come home.. he could call you to come get him. Or, get one of his "buddies" to bring him home. He's not showing up until the next day because he's too busy laying up with his mistress. The bars close at a certain time nightly. He isn't being honest with you..bottom line. Whether or not you confront him..is your business.. But, he's playin you! Why is he doing this to you..you ask.. BECAUSE HE CAN.! You allow him to pull all nighters and not come home until the next day. A person only does to you what you allow them to do.. Think about that. I guarantee if you even attempted to do those things to him.. he wouldn't tolerate it.
2007-06-23 17:36:49 · answer #4 · answered by Christine 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
YOU NEED TO TELL HIM THAT STAYING OUT ALL NIGHT IS NOT 'ACCEPTABLE' FOR "YOUR" MAN! IF HE WANTS TO CONTINUE TO DO SO, HE NEEDS TO BECOME FREE! You know you did not get married to have a man stay out all night, BTW, HE IS HAVING AN AFFAIR!
He thinks you are not just trusting; but a fool too! YOU DID NOT ASK TO MEET/TALK TO/VERIFY THAT THIS FRIEND EXIST~~AND HE DID NOT OFFER, SO IT HAS TO BE A WOMAN FRIEND.
SO, DEDUCTION DICTATES THAT YOU ASSUME IT IS A WOMAN AND YOU TELL HIM THAT!
EVEN IF IT IS LEGIT AND A MALE FRIEND'S HOUSE....YOU HAVE A 'RIGHT' TO KNOW WHO IT IS AND MEET HIM.
If it were my hubby, HE WOULD COME HOME TO FIND HIS STUFF ON THE FRONT LAWN IN A PLASTIC BAG! PERHAPS YOU NEED TO TELL HIM THAT.....THE NEXT TIME HE STAYS OUT ALL NIGHT, HE CAN PICK UP HIS THINGS FROM THE FRONT LAWN AND GO BACK AND SPEND ALL THE TIME HE WANTS.
2007-06-23 18:42:19 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk to him, but dont be accusing, let him know u could come pick him up, and if something happened to the kids u would want to be able to reach him, even if he is drunk, someone could bring him to the hosp that was sober. Maybe he just needs to get away from the stress of the kids for a while, but let him know you want that privledge too, at least to get out, u dont have to stay out till the next day,
2007-06-23 17:10:13 · answer #6 · answered by Ms Always Right 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Why would you put up with a husband that goes some where to spend the night anyway????? if your married you don't just go and stay overnight with someone !!! That's a good sign he is cheating on you !!! why in the world would you put up with him ??? this is crazy ! to me married men only spend their nights at home !!! that's why their married!! he's not a kid anymore that needs to spend a night with his friends!!! wake up and stop putting up with this bull - - - - !!
2007-06-23 17:37:49 · answer #7 · answered by monkeymomma46 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you go through his clothings before you put them in the washing machine? Do you check his car?
Trust your instincts.
Are you able to follow him next time he goes out? Ask someone to mind the children and start playing detective. I know I would.
2007-06-23 17:10:27 · answer #8 · answered by like-it 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Does he have a cell - if so call him when he is out all night
and kind off ask for details as to where he is..etc. Is he having fun, what bar?
Either he is cheating or not responsible.
2007-06-23 17:13:05 · answer #9 · answered by ensoman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A married guy w 2 kids should not stay out all night without you knowing where he is at!! Put your foot down, dont be a doormat.
2007-06-23 17:29:08 · answer #10 · answered by YUMMY1 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋